# I got a letter from my ex-girlfriend....from prison! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 21, 2010, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968 "2010-12-21T16:56:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Keith\_Berry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/22d042/32.png) [@Keith\_Berry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Keith_Berry)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/1 "2010-12-21T16:56:49Z")
This is somebody that haven’t seen or heard from in 5 years, but we had a torridly hot relationship while it lasted…and I opened the mailbox yesterday to find a letter from her in a MARYLAND DEPARTMENT CORRECTIONS envelope. The letter itself is pretty banal, how-are-you-doing type of sentiment. On a whim, I looked her up on the Maryland Judicary website and it looks like she received a two-year sentence for burglary, theft over 1,000 dollars, and drug possession. All the charges stem from June of this year. She evidently hit the skids sometime after our relationship ended. We were both into drugs, but I quit and she most likely didn’t. What do you guys think, should I send her some commissary money or something? She’s a very small and delicate girl and I think she’s gonna get eaten alive in jail. Of course, my common sense is telling me to have nothing to do with this situation, but I can’t help feeling pity for her. My biggest fear is that if I correspond with her or send her money, she’ll show up on my doorstep once she gets out, and that’s the last thing I want, hot sex or no. ---
**Author:** ![Nightfall1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@Nightfall1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightfall1)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/2 "2010-12-21T16:59:17Z")
As much as you want to. Let it go. I’ll say again. LET IT GO. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/3 "2010-12-21T16:59:50Z")
> [@Keith\_Berry](#): > > …my common sense is telling me to have nothing to do with this situation… I think you answered your own question. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/4 "2010-12-21T17:00:15Z")
Just ignore it. She’s trying to get back with you and that, my friend, is a dangerous road. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/5 "2010-12-21T17:01:55Z")
Might check to see if you can put a little something in her commissary account anonymously. That way you’ve done a nice thing without exposing yourself to ex-con visits. ---
**Author:** ![Meatros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Meatros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meatros)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/6 "2010-12-21T17:03:42Z")
> [@Keith\_Berry](#): > > My biggest fear is that if I correspond with her or send her money, she’ll show up on my doorstep once she gets out, and that’s the last thing I want, hot sex or no. Then don’t correspond with her. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/7 "2010-12-21T17:05:16Z")
Also realize that she’s probably sending out similar letters to quite a few people, hoping to rack up as much as possible. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/8 "2010-12-21T17:20:51Z")
Not a Blood relative? Let it drop. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/9 "2010-12-21T17:37:42Z")
See of you can drop in something for her anonymously. Its a good gesture for someone who is down. And no risk to you. ---
**Author:** ![USCDiver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/uscdiver/32/354_2.png) [@USCDiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/USCDiver)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/10 "2010-12-21T17:49:43Z")
Anything to indicate this was some sort of 12-step atonement thing? ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/11 "2010-12-21T18:16:38Z")
Damn. The only thing I’ve ever gotten is a friend request on Facebook. I’m envious. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/12 "2010-12-21T18:19:07Z")
Well if you don’t want the hot sex, you can send her to my doorstep. Just tell her your donation was from me. Thanks. You’re a pal. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/13 "2010-12-21T18:21:04Z")
Go out to your car. Slam the driver’s side door on your genitals until the urge to have any kind of contact with this woman passes. Repeat as necessary. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/14 "2010-12-21T18:22:06Z")
One of my wife’s former students is serving a life sentence. He never had much family, and locked on to my wife as a mother figure. She knows how important she is to him, but she constantly tries to keep the relationship arms-length. A few letters during the year, taking his phone calls every couple of months, that sort of thing. If you don’t want her back in your life, stay away. If you let her back into your life, that’s where she’s going to be. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Onimous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Ann\_Onimous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Onimous)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/15 "2010-12-21T18:28:26Z")
I’ve got an ex-boyfriend in prison. Maybe they should hook up. No, wait. She wouldn’t want him. 🙂 > [@kunilou](#): > > If you don’t want her back in your life, stay away. If you let her back into your life, that’s where she’s going to be. I agree with this 125%. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/16 "2010-12-21T18:37:22Z")
Just keep in mind - the only thing better than conjugal visit sex is escaped fugitive sex. ---
**Author:** ![Leon497](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Leon497](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leon497)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/17 "2010-12-21T18:51:32Z")
I just can’t imagine being afraid some hot cutie I knew is going to show up wanting sex, I’d love to have your problem. I mean if she did show it does not mean you are obligated to marry or anything you know. I can see avoiding this if you yourself are now married as some women have silly reservations about helping other out in this kind of situation, but just consider it charity work you could really feel good about. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/18 "2010-12-21T18:56:58Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > Just keep in mind - the only thing better than conjugal visit sex is escaped fugitive sex. But make sure you have a fight first. Bonus points if her name is Mulva. Make sure to say Heelllloooooooo for me. But seriously. If you think you could do a little something WITHOUT her finding out its you, I would be inclined to. If she’s not so much a bad person as a decent person that did something stupid, I think a little kindness might be in order. ---
**Author:** ![BobArrgh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobarrgh/32/2881_2.png) [@BobArrgh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobArrgh)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/19 "2010-12-21T18:57:10Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Not a Blood relative? Let it drop. Umm … from the OP … “we had a **torridly hot relationship** while it lasted” (emphasis mine). :eek: As noted above, run away, run away! ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968/20 "2010-12-21T19:00:49Z")
> [@Leon497](#): > > I just can’t imagine being afraid some hot cutie I knew is going to show up wanting sex, I’d love to have your problem. I mean if she did show it does not mean you are obligated to marry or anything you know. I can see avoiding this if you yourself are now married as some women have silly reservations about helping other out in this kind of situation, but just consider it charity work you could really feel good about. Said hot cutie is in prison for drug-related crime, apparently. When your personal shit starts disappearing because she is selling it to feed her habit and her scabby drug-addict friends start coming around (and stealing your shit) and her dealer starts leaning on you for the money she owes, you’ll cry yourself to sleep at night wishing you’d slammed that car door on your dick. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-a-letter-from-my-ex-girlfriend-from-prison/564968.md?page=2)