# I Got My Google Class Action Suit Settlement Check Today!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [July 6, 2012, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447 "2012-07-06T18:22:05Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/1 "2012-07-06T18:22:05Z")

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I didn’t even know I was part of this class action lawsuit, but boy was I surprised to get my big settlement share!

It is a check for 55 cents!

I have no idea how to spend this windfall.  
Suggestions welcome.

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**Author:** ![Lancia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lancia/32/17174_2.png) [@Lancia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lancia)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/2 "2012-07-06T18:51:28Z")

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Hookers and blow, naturally.

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**Author:** ![Donnerwetter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Donnerwetter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Donnerwetter)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/3 "2012-07-06T19:18:45Z")

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Most important, don’t let the sudden wealth deform your character. You may be a rich man now, but don’t forget you’re still human.

And show some compassion for the folks who worked their fingers to the bones to make this fairy tale come true, your lawyers: Put a smile on their weary faces. It doesn’t take much. Buy them a warm meal, new shoes, maybe a warm coat for the winter.

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**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/4 "2012-07-06T19:24:02Z")

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small candy bar?

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**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/5 "2012-07-06T19:34:33Z")

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A stamp to send it to Google with a note telling them to spend it on process improvement.

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**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/6 "2012-07-06T19:37:51Z")

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Buy a share of Bing?

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**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/7 "2012-07-06T20:40:23Z")

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> [@DMark](#):
>
> I didn’t even know I was part of this class action lawsuit, but boy was I surprised to get my big settlement share!
> 
> It is a check for 55 cents!
> 
> I have no idea how to spend this windfall.  
> Suggestions welcome.

What is US postage these days? You could spend the 55 cents on a stamp to send a letter to the lawyers thanking them for winning the lawsuit. 😃

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**Author:** ![LawMonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/8 "2012-07-06T21:08:19Z")

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Why are you asking us? Obviously you need to google “[how should i spend 55 cents](http://lmgtfy.com/?q=how+should+i+spend+55+cents)”.

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**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/9 "2012-07-06T21:20:46Z")

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Cones for all the neighborhood tards?

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**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/10 "2012-07-06T21:44:57Z")

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> [@LawMonkey](#):
>
> Why are you asking us? Obviously you need to google “[how should i spend 55 cents](http://lmgtfy.com/?q=how+should+i+spend+55+cents)”.

Heh. The second hit is the OP.

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**Author:** ![fifty-six](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@fifty-six](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fifty-six)\
**Post date:** [July 6, 2012, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/11 "2012-07-06T21:47:20Z")

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How much wan interest?

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**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/12 "2012-07-07T00:49:57Z")

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How many 55₵ cheques do the lawyers get?

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**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/13 "2012-07-07T00:51:58Z")

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Between you and your check and me and my 85 cent check from the power company, we can take over the world!

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**Author:** ![notfrommensa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f14d63/32.png) [@notfrommensa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notfrommensa)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/14 "2012-07-07T02:07:27Z")

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VEGAS Baby!

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**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/15 "2012-07-07T02:12:32Z")

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> [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](#):
>
> Cones for all the neighborhood tards?

The sentiment is offensive; the phrasing even more so. I assume this is intentional. Since you have a pattern of provocative behavior, I’m going to give you a warning for being a jerk.

Your posting privileges are under discussion by the moderators.

**twickster** , MPSIMS moderator

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/16 "2012-07-07T02:15:52Z")

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> [@twickster](#):
>
> The sentiment is offensive; the phrasing even more so. I assume this is intentional. Since you have a pattern of provocative behavior, I’m going to give you a warning for being a jerk.
> 
> Your posting privileges are under discussion by the moderators.
> 
> **twickster** , MPSIMS moderator

It was a joke based on a current thread in GQ, where someone made a reference to “tards” and unusual strength…

(it would have been clear to anyone who has read said thread)

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/17 "2012-07-07T18:12:02Z")

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> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#):
>
> Between you and your check and me and my 85 cent check from the power company, we can take over the world!

Wow - great idea! We could form a SuperPac and run political ads in every state!  
I will look into finding an accountant to make sure our seed money does not get squandered.

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**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/18 "2012-07-07T20:02:23Z")

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You should launch a class action suit against the shitty lawyers who only managed to get you 55 cents.

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**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/19 "2012-07-07T20:05:43Z")

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> [@Ike\_Witt](#):
>
> You should launch a class action suit against the shitty lawyers who only managed to get you 55 cents.

which will probably have the net result of receiving a check for 54 cents some day.

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**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\
**Post date:** [July 7, 2012, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447/20 "2012-07-07T20:28:59Z")

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> [@Canadjun](#):
>
> which will probably have the net result of receiving a check for 54 cents some day.

And the cycle will then continue. Kumbaya.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-google-class-action-suit-settlement-check-today/627447.md?page=2)
