# I got my tax relief check (500 buckaroos) now help me spend it

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [July 27, 2001, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968 "2001-07-27T14:50:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![FarmerOak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9c0ed/32.png) [@FarmerOak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FarmerOak)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/21 "2001-07-29T14:01:27Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by CrankyAsAnOldMan \*  
> \*\*
> 
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by FarmerOak \*  
> > \*\*  
> > Send this money to the Democratic National Committee, that we might undo the single largest fraud ever perpetuated on the face of the Earth \*\*
> 
> Good god in heaven above. I’m a lifelong Democrat, but even I wouldn’t advocate putting the cash in the hands of that or any political party.
> 
> \*\*

Wench! Where shall we put it?

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**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/22 "2001-07-29T14:39:43Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> This “rebate” on the “surplus” is a fraud, perpetrated by venal, short-sighted and arrogant people. They are squandering my money - YOUR money - in ways that you would BEAT your children for, if they were foolish enough to do so.
> 
> Send this money to the Democratic National Committee, that we might undo the single largest fraud ever perpetuated on the face of the Earth - the “election” of Gorgeous W. Chimp, the most laughable Chief Executive the country has ever known since Hoobert Heever.

**Moderator’s Notes:** Please keep your invective confined to the forum designated for that purpose. This thread is not be either a debate, or a vituperation. I will not tolerate comments of this nature here.

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**Author:** ![FarmerOak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9c0ed/32.png) [@FarmerOak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FarmerOak)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/23 "2001-07-29T15:03:12Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by UncleBeer \*  
> \*\*
> 
> > [@](#):
> >
> > This “rebate” on the “surplus” is a fraud, perpetrated by venal, short-sighted and arrogant people. They are squandering my money - YOUR money - in ways that you would BEAT your children for, if they were foolish enough to do so.
> > 
> > Send this money to the Democratic National Committee, that we might undo the single largest fraud ever perpetuated on the face of the Earth - the “election” of Gorgeous W. Chimp, the most laughable Chief Executive the country has ever known since Hoobert Heever.
> 
> **Moderator’s Notes:** Please keep your invective confined to the forum designated for that purpose. This thread is not be either a debate, or a vituperation. I will not tolerate comments of this nature here. \*\*

I regret that I am unable to discern that which displeases you, moderator. This IS MPSIMS. Have you confused yourself with a moderator for GQ or GD? Or perhaps another board, one that matters?

Or is it that your posts in other forums have been repeatedly refuted, and you feel the need to assert your authority on your “turf”, as the “kids” say?

Perhaps you were not previously made aware of the forum which you were designated to moderate… permit me to inform you that this is \*\*MUNDANE POINTLESS SHIT That I Must Share \*\*. For you to project your reactionary politics upon the board is both laughable and contraindicated. In fact, it merely reinforces your position as the Stooge to whom the most uninteresting Board on the Site was Sloughed.

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**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/24 "2001-07-29T15:14:34Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by FarmerOak \*  
> \*\*For you to project your reactionary politics upon the board is both laughable and contraindicated. In fact, it merely reinforces your position as the Stooge to whom the most uninteresting Board on the Site was Sloughed. \*\*

Uh, no.

What **UncleBeer** was telling you is that there is a forum for this kind of invective. This forum is not it. Any further posts of this type will force us to reconsider your posting priviledges here.

Thank you.

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**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/25 "2001-07-29T15:26:03Z")

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Let’s get this thread back on less-shaky ground. I have heard many people (and Dopers) claim they are giving the money to organizations that represent causes that they believe might be the least well-served by our present administration. You could do that.

But let’s face it, if you’re here asking, weighing your options against buying a playstation, you aren’t seriously considering giving this cash away.

I think you should start your own lobster farm. You can probably afford one good tank, and maybe some sort of jacuzzi-thing to simulate waves. Also, a 50-lb bag of morton’s to make the fresh water into that like the briny deep. Break into your local Red Lobster franchise, grab a couple of the horniest-looking lobsters from their little aquarium there, throw 'em in your tank, and sit back and wait for the money to roll in!

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**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/26 "2001-07-29T15:30:33Z")

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… and then let me know when dinner is ready. I’d about a 2¼ pounder.

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**Author:** ![FarmerOak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9c0ed/32.png) [@FarmerOak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FarmerOak)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/27 "2001-07-29T17:32:41Z")

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My boorish behavior yeaterday was and is inexcusable.

I apologize to **Euty** and to **Beer** for impugning their integrity, dedication and perspicacity.

I resolve never to impugn the qualities of the SDMB moderators again.

I am truly sorry.  
Farmer Oak

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**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\
**Post date:** [July 29, 2001, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/28 "2001-07-29T17:40:13Z")

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Thank you.

Have a lobster on me. 😉

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**Author:** ![urban1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d07c76/32.png) [@urban1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/urban1)\
**Post date:** [July 30, 2001, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/29 "2001-07-30T02:52:21Z")

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I’d suggest that you save the money. This is not a rebate, but an **ADVANCE** on next years tax. You are (probably) going to owe it back.

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**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\
**Post date:** [July 30, 2001, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/30 "2001-07-30T14:19:56Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Eutychus55 \*  
> \*\*Have a lobster on me. 😉 \*\*

::doubtfully:; oooookay, but how do I get the lobster to **stay** on you through the boiling and what not?

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**Author:** ![aseymayo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e57/32.png) [@aseymayo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aseymayo)\
**Post date:** [July 30, 2001, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/31 "2001-07-30T18:03:03Z")

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You can’t go wrong blowing at least some of it at [Stupid.com.](http://www.stupid.com/tooweird.htm) The Insane Jumping Cow is on my birthday wish list.

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**Author:** ![Kaitlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/73ab20/32.png) [@Kaitlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaitlyn)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/32 "2001-07-31T12:18:16Z")

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I just got my $300. After winning two million dollars in the lottery, I can just blow the whole thing on hats.

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**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/33 "2001-07-31T15:34:14Z")

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Just got our $600. It’s got vacation in FLA written all over it.

OK, we already have the vacation planned. But this is LOADS more Gator wrestling in which I can participate!

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**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/34 "2001-07-31T16:24:12Z")

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WOOOHOOO!!! Just got my 600 bucks.

After dividng it up three ways I’ve got $200 I can spen guilt free. What to do, what to do? I guess I could go down to the local strip club and help put some of those girls through college. 😉

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/35 "2001-07-31T17:10:32Z")

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Use it as a downpayment on a vintage Rolex Submariner.

Buy a gun.

Use it toward a bigger teevee.

Get it all in one-dollar bills. Put it in your underpants and stride around saying, “I am the KING!”

Buy candy.

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**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/36 "2001-07-31T17:24:32Z")

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Buy a [theremin](http://www.bigbriar.com) and be the envy of all your friends. And if you have enough left, buy me one too.

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**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/37 "2001-07-31T17:25:09Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Johnny L.A. \*  
> \*\*Get it all in one-dollar bills. Put it in your underpants and stride around saying, “I am the KING!” \*\*

I do this with quarters.

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**Author:** ![capybara](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/capybara/32/202_2.png) [@capybara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/capybara)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/38 "2001-07-31T17:46:48Z")

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Sorry, you guys, but it appears that Urban is correct on this one-- this isn’t a rebate on this last year’s taxes, but an advance on your anticipated refund that you (perhaps) receive next year. See San Diego Union Tribune on-line report from July 26 by David Milstead, Scripps Howard News Service, for example.

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**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/39 "2001-07-31T17:57:00Z")

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I need to get my CV joints fixed. I hope I don’t crash before I get my tax refund advance.

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**Author:** ![The\_Witch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8e7dd6/32.png) [@The\_Witch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Witch)\
**Post date:** [July 31, 2001, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-my-tax-relief-check-500-buckaroos-now-help-me-spend-it/73968/40 "2001-07-31T19:18:54Z")

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Mine is going here: [http://www.deborahsplace.org](http://www.deborahsplace.org).

If you’re not feeling particularly eleemosynary now, you can donate the PS2 once there’s a PS3 :).

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