# I got this email from Amazon today: **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 11, 2025, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894 "2025-04-11T08:15:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![bob\_2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bob_2/32/3341_2.png) [@bob\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_2)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/1 "2025-04-11T08:15:03Z")
**[Amazon.co.uk](http://Amazon.co.uk)** Hi Bob, Your package with Large Heavy Duty Squirrel… will be delivered today. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 9:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/2 "2025-04-11T09:33:45Z")
Have you ordered a large heavy-duty squirrel, or is it a scam? Be carefully that you don’t end up with a marmot with a duster glued to it. ---
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/3 "2025-04-11T09:40:18Z")
I’m not clicking on the link, but I am dying to know when it will arrive. Is there tracking info? Could you provide pictures when it does? My squirrels are all light duty and I’d like to be able to assess a heavy duty one ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 9:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/4 "2025-04-11T09:44:28Z")
Does it come with Moose? Asking for two friends. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/5 "2025-04-11T10:10:45Z")
And their boss? ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/6 "2025-04-11T10:12:10Z")
Good purchase. You don’t want the small light duty squirrels, they’re a rip off. ---
**Author:** ![bob\_2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bob_2/32/3341_2.png) [@bob\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_2)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/7 "2025-04-11T10:13:39Z")
It arrived an hour ago, and it’s no scam. _\> Large Heavy Duty Squirrel Proof Bird Feeder for Wild Seed Feed Mix Outdoor Garden use - Mocha Brown - with Strong Galvanised Metal Cage to Deter Squirrels…_ The squirrels in question are nasty American imports that bullied our native red squirrels almost to extinction. They are athletic and clever and love to steal the seeds I put out for the birds. ---
**Author:** ![Jegpeg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jegpeg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jegpeg)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/8 "2025-04-11T10:54:46Z")
But the US has extremely high tariffs and other barriers to prevent out magnificent squirrels being exported. They have been ripping us off with th8s imbalance for years and needs to be stopped. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/9 "2025-04-11T12:00:54Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > Does it come with Moose? Asking for two friends. That would be Møøse - get it right! ---
**Author:** ![Jasmine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jasmine/32/2964_2.png) [@Jasmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jasmine)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/10 "2025-04-11T12:17:43Z")
Hope for a red squirrel because they are considered an endangered species in England and might be worth money. On the other hand, you might get arrested for “red squirrel trafficking” if caught. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/11 "2025-04-11T12:46:17Z")
> [@bob\_2](#): > > Large Heavy Duty Squirrel _Proof Bird Feeder_ [![](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/345/758/033.jpg) ](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/345/758/033.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/12 "2025-04-11T12:49:52Z")
> [@bob\_2](#): > > The squirrels in question are nasty American imports that bullied our native red squirrels almost to extinction Come get your starlings. (Sucks about the red squirrels though; nifty ears!) ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/13 "2025-04-11T12:51:13Z")
Can we keep Clarice? ---
**Author:** ![bob\_2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bob_2/32/3341_2.png) [@bob\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_2)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/14 "2025-04-11T13:42:21Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > Come get your starlings. I think ours have emigrated across the Atlantic: > Figures show that since 1979, there has been an **85 per cent** decrease in the number of starling sightings in every British garden. The number of woodpigeons spotted, however, has increased by an enormous 1,160 per cent. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/15 "2025-04-11T13:57:56Z")
The heavy duty squirrel assholes have started chewing on our porch paint (and wood) again. Glad to ship a couple overseas. ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/16 "2025-04-11T14:13:28Z")
This reminds me of the time my wife ordered something called a Root Assassin from Amazon. It’s a sort of shovel with a serrated tapered blade for cutting through and digging up tree roots. Except when I found the box on the porch, there was a sticker or piece of tape between the two O’s in Root and I was sure it was covering up a B. Awesome, I thought, my wife ordered a Robot Assassin! I was thinking about who I’d like to have it kill first when I opened the box and… yeah, not what I was expecting. ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/17 "2025-04-11T14:31:07Z")
> [@bob\_2](#): > > Squirrel Proof Bird Feeder I’ll just let you know right now, you have **not** bought a Squirrel Proof Bird Feeder. You have, in actual fact, bought a Puzzle-based Squirrel Feeder. Once they figure that thing out, they’ll go to town on the seeds. ---
**Author:** ![bob\_2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bob_2/32/3341_2.png) [@bob\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_2)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/18 "2025-04-11T14:34:41Z")
One of the reviews had pictures of a squirrel removing the top to get at the contents. ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/19 "2025-04-11T14:36:42Z")
And you bought it anyways? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![bob\_2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bob_2/32/3341_2.png) [@bob\_2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_2)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2025, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894/20 "2025-04-11T14:38:42Z")
It was one of many that asserted its squirrel and pigeon proof qualities. Nothing is perfect and every purchase has “some” negative reviews. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-got-this-email-from-amazon-today/1016894.md?page=2)