# I had a dream **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 25, 2005, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409 "2005-05-25T07:44:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/1 "2005-05-25T07:44:44Z")
I had a dream that I had a giant weiner-dog named Flavius. He was nine feet long and had twelve legs. But he wasn’t particularly taller than your average weiner dog. Eech leg was maybe three inches long. Although he was clearly not a snake, his body would slither like one, with each pair of legs always directly following the one in front. He liked to make lots of "S"es. Flavius confessed to me that he was depressed, as he could not find a mate. After all, there weren’t any twelve-legged weiner-bitches in the entire Metropolitan area. He checked. So I set about to remedy the situation. I irradiated my fire-escape garden with powerful gamma rays, and caused a centipede to mutate and grow to fantastic proportions. After all this effort, Flavius rolled his little weiner-eyes at me and said, “I don’t _do_ insects.” “It’s a chilopod!” I retorted, “a _mutant_ chilopod!” But this did not convince him. Poor Flavius hurled himself off the fire-escape and plunged to his death. Flavius was a real dickhead. But I loved him. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![SiouxChief](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@SiouxChief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiouxChief)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/2 "2005-05-25T17:43:21Z")
Oh, waiter! I’ll have what **Friedo** ’s having! ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/3 "2005-05-25T17:51:41Z")
Hello, and welcome to Freudian Dream Analysis 101. To get things started, can you spot all 17 uses of subliminal penis imagery in the OP? ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/4 "2005-05-25T19:03:42Z")
Dude, get me some of whatever you’re on. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/5 "2005-05-25T20:22:16Z")
“But I don’t even _own_ any horses! Especially little Arabians the size of cats!”. ---
**Author:** ![Flander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8c91f0/32.png) [@Flander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flander)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/6 "2005-05-25T20:47:58Z")
Flavius?! Where the fuck did your mind come up with that? ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/7 "2005-05-25T21:01:14Z")
Party at **Friedo’s**! He’s got some awesome shit! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2005, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/8 "2005-05-25T22:02:14Z")
On the other hand, sometimes a chilopod is just a chilopod. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2005, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/9 "2005-05-26T00:24:34Z")
Ok, you gotta quit mixing Dr. Pepper and dill pickle potato chips, just before bedtime. Or else pass me some! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2005, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/10 "2005-05-26T04:17:56Z")
> [@Flander](#): > > Flavius?! Where the fuck did your mind come up with that? Well, I _was_ reading about Emperor Justinian a few days ago. One of his names was Flavius. ---
**Author:** ![kimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f0a364/32.png) [@kimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kimera)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2005, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/11 "2005-05-26T06:31:05Z")
Aw, I wish I had cute dreams like that! The other night I dreamt I was forced to have sex with Pamela Anderson for some reality tv show. I was scared because it was going to be BDSM and she had sucked the eyeballs out of her last partner. I woke up wondering if it was even possible for someone to suck someone’s eyeballs out. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2005, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-had-a-dream/305409/12 "2005-05-26T19:15:32Z")
Eyeball sucking, eh? That sounds pretty hot.