# I hate Alton Brown more than ever. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 16, 2012, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412 "2012-07-16T14:35:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/21 "2012-07-16T16:48:53Z")
> [@Labrador\_Deceiver](#): > > Then why is he crying when they get cut? Because they’re made out of onions. ---
**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/22 "2012-07-16T17:57:26Z")
The Food Network has been on a long slide straight to Hell since the very first season. The less it is about food, and the more it is about “personalities” the less I want to watch it. Food Network, instead of nothing but infomercials all night long, could you possibly play some of your old, food-oriented shows like _Taste_? ---
**Author:** ![Leaper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4bbf92/32.png) [@Leaper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaper)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/23 "2012-07-16T17:58:54Z")
If they could make more money from that than from the infomercials, I’m sure they would. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/24 "2012-07-16T18:33:44Z")
> [@Ogre](#): > > What gets me is that Bobby Flay, the one person from Food Network who I’ve always heard was a complete piece of work, who is supposedly an utter tool to work with, comes off best on that show. He’s all business, sure, but he appears to be very straightforward in his relationships with the contestants. Giada is a horrifying harpy. Alton is a godawful sociopath who should NEVER let his true self be seen on TV. I was going to say pretty much the same thing here. Bobby Flay comes off as a smug prick on pretty much everything he does on the Food Network. Even on Throwdown, which was created for the express purpose of softening his image, he comes across as a kind of a douche. But on this season of Food Network Star he actually comes off pretty well. He seems genuinely invested in his proteges, has a good sense of humor and offers advice with being overly smarmy. Alton Brown, for as avuncular and gregarious as he appears on Good Eats, comes off as a sourpuss in pretty much everything else he does. His demeanor here reeks of “I’m just here to collect a paycheck, and so long as it clears, I don’t really give a damn what happens.” ---
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/25 "2012-07-16T18:38:11Z")
> [@Leaper](#): > > If they could make more money from that than from the infomercials, I’m sure they would. You know what would have even better ratings? HARD CORE PORN! Anyway what is the point of even having niche channels if the programs they were created for aren’t even profitable on them?!?😕 It would be like every restaurant deciding for monetary reasons to sell only burgers and fries, even if it is a Ethiopian/Japanese fusion place by name. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/26 "2012-07-16T18:42:57Z")
> [@grude](#): > > Anyway what is the point of even having niche channels if the programs they were created for aren’t even profitable on them?!?😕 It’s almost inevitable in a mass market medium. It’s called [channel drift](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Channel_drift) or[network decay](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NetworkDecay). ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/27 "2012-07-16T18:44:44Z")
Watching this season of Food Network Star pretty much erased any affection I had for Alton Brown completely. I really like Good Eats still, but I don’t think Alton is the same person he was back then. Actually, I think his personality changed a lot when he lost all that weight. And for a while there, he was way skinny and seemed very bitter about it all. I remember the last couple of Good Eats he did after he lost the weight, he had already lost his charm. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/28 "2012-07-16T18:48:54Z")
> [@Rhiannon8404](#): > > Watching this season of Food Network Star pretty much erased any affection I had for Alton Brown completely. I really like Good Eats still, but I don’t think Alton is the same person he was back then. Actually, I think his personality changed a lot when he lost all that weight. And for a while there, he was way skinny and seemed very bitter about it all. I remember the last couple of Good Eats he did after he lost the weight, he had already lost his charm. So it’s not just me then. I’ve kinda hated the guy for a while, but sheesh, that performance last night made me want to beat him with a frozen turkey leg. I went a-Googlin’ last night to see if anyone was talking about how _obviously_ fake his tears were, but the only thing I found was something along the lines of, “Could you guys believe Alton was reduced to tears? OMG!” Grrrr. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/29 "2012-07-16T18:49:48Z")
> [@Sicks\_Ate](#): > > Well, that’s fucking stupid. Its actually a sign of respect. The chef is in charge…its _his_ kitchen. Truly great chefs that aren’t total fuckwits are teachers, really. That’s why line cooks, roundsmen, sous chefs, etc at prestigious restaurants put up with the crappy pay and (sometimes) abusive treatment. They get to learn from someone renowned, take what they learn and employ it in their own way as they climb the kitchen hierarchy. It also looks great on your resume to list “worked for Alain Ducasse”. ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/30 "2012-07-16T19:03:08Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > Its actually a sign of respect. The chef is in charge…its _his_ kitchen. Truly great chefs that aren’t total fuckwits are teachers, really. That’s why line cooks, roundsmen, sous chefs, etc at prestigious restaurants put up with the crappy pay and (sometimes) abusive treatment. They get to learn from someone renowned, take what they learn and employ it in their own way as they climb the kitchen hierarchy. It also looks great on your resume to list “worked for Alain Ducasse”. Uh huh, I get that. But working for/with/under a renowned expert in any other discipline is equally prestigious, isn’t it? And yet you don’t hear underlings screamin ‘Yes, Astrophysicist Who Made Several Paradigm-Shifting Observations!’ or ‘No, Highly Esteemed Virologist!’ To take something _directly_ from a military setting and adapt it for…cooking? Can anybody with direct experience tell me when this practice (boot-camp style cookery, I mean) started? I have no way to know, but I _suspect_ that TV had something to do with it. I’m a little sarcastic today. ---
**Author:** ![Lukeinva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lukeinva/32/17872_2.png) [@Lukeinva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lukeinva)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/31 "2012-07-16T19:12:03Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > I enjoy cooking and cooking programs as much as the next schlub, but I can’t help but wondering why these chefs think they’re such hot shit. They aren’t surgeons who literally hold people’s lives in their hands. They’re not captains of industry who employ thousands and can sway entire economies with their decisions. Hell, they’re not even actors who have legions of men envying them and women lusting for them. > > They _cook food_. :rolleyes: The Celebrity Chef… appears to be a dwindling fad. ---
**Author:** ![obfusciatrist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4af34b/32.png) [@obfusciatrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/obfusciatrist)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/32 "2012-07-16T19:15:52Z")
Well, I do shout “yes, chef” whenever my boss tells me to do something. And I work in banking. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/33 "2012-07-16T19:25:50Z")
I always assumed the “yes, chef” was to ensure that you were heard and acknowledged in a busy, noisy kitchen. ---
**Author:** ![zombywoof](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/9e8a1a/32.png) [@zombywoof](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zombywoof)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/34 "2012-07-16T19:33:39Z")
> [@Sicks\_Ate](#): > > To take something _directly_ from a military setting and adapt it for…cooking? Can anybody with direct experience tell me when this practice (boot-camp style cookery, I mean) started? I have no way to know, but I _suspect_ that TV had something to do with it. [Brigade de Cuisine](http://escoffier.com/index.php/culinary-reference/124-the-brigade-de-cuisine) ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/35 "2012-07-16T19:42:12Z")
When AB had his show about motorcycling across America a few years ago (I don’t remember the title and don’t care enough to look it up), there were a few captured moments on camera that were totally unscripted, and he came across as a prick or a martinet. That’s when I started changing my opinion about him and stopped watching _Good Eats_. ---
**Author:** ![Acid\_Lamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Acid\_Lamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acid_Lamp)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/36 "2012-07-16T19:43:45Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > I always assumed the “yes, chef” was to ensure that you were heard and acknowledged in a busy, noisy kitchen. I’m fairly certain this is accurate. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/37 "2012-07-16T19:44:25Z")
**teela brown** , examples? EDIT: I too assumed it was so the head chef guy knew that he was heard and acknowledged. ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/38 "2012-07-16T20:01:46Z")
> [@Covered\_In\_Bees](#): > > **teela brown** , examples? > > EDIT: I too assumed it was so the head chef guy knew that he was heard and acknowledged. Yep - when I used to run a restaurant, we used “thank you” when orders were called out as a signal that they were acknowledged and done - sometimes we would also repeat back what was ordered to make sure there were no mistakes. Yeah, i know = more noise to make sure things are heard in a noisy environment - but it also makes sure that _everyone_ hears and that everyone is doing things - - helps more than hurts in the ‘team’ aspect of a busy kitchen. ---
**Author:** ![lance\_strongarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/87869e/32.png) [@lance\_strongarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lance_strongarm)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/39 "2012-07-16T20:03:33Z")
> [@Ogre](#): > > I’ve bitched about this before. Watching Alton Brown is insufferable. His real personality, which he displays on every other show besides Good Eats, makes his “friendly food geek” routine stand out like a giant, badly formed pair of fake tits. I can’t watch Good Eats now without thinking “fakey fakey fakey fake faaaaaaaaaaaake!” > > The guy’s really a stiff, unapproachable, tinpot dictator. He’s a manipulative martinet without a shred of real emotion besides contempt. > > The worst of it was last night on Food Network Star, during the big emotional cliffhanger. Which one of Alton’s lovable losers will be sent home? Oh, the drama! Oh, the emotion! Oh, the sheer, raw humanity! Now is the time for a carefully orchestrated outpouring of tears and fake-assed TV histrionics. > > That’s right. Alton Brown was supposedly crying. You see, he was supposedly equally attached to both his beloved protege’s. > > Except that they were the most obviously bullshit TV tears I’ve ever seen. Alton couldn’t give a rat’s ass whether those two idiots drowned in peanut oil. The camera kept giving us short cutaways of Alton supposedly overcome with emotion, but it was as if the cameraman and the director both knew that he was utterly unable to show, and possibly to even EXPERIENCE, real feelings. It was painfully hilarious. > > Actually, watching the process of making one of these shows is like watching the proverbial sausage-making. It really kills any illusions of authenticity you might harbor about these people. They’re all Type A, cutthroat, contemptuous pricks, and no, the mere fact of that doesn’t surprise me particularly, but it does not make me want to watch these assholes. Are you sure it wasn’t supposed to be fake, as a sort of parody of TV, or self-parody of Brown, and the joke just went over your head? ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2012, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412/40 "2012-07-16T20:12:32Z")
> [@lance\_strongarm](#): > > Are you sure it wasn’t supposed to be fake, as a sort of parody of TV, or self-parody of Brown, and the joke just went over your head? Yes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-alton-brown-more-than-ever/628412.md?page=3)