# I hate backronyms and folk etymologies.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [July 26, 2014, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110 "2014-07-26T17:54:03Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)
#### Post date: [July 26, 2014, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/1 "2014-07-26T17:54:03Z")
Really. I hate them with an intensity suitable for the Pit, but I’m not much with the creative use of profanity, so I’m here instead. Work currently has me exposed to a lot of clinical trial names, and they’re all fucking backronyms. It seems that the pharmaceutical research industry is the only group of people more obsessed with cutesy backronyms than Congress.
And folk etymologies! They make my teeth hurt, and send me into a flurry of debunking like nothing else. For unlawful carnal knowledge? Port outward, starboard home (which doesn’t even make the limited amount of sense most folk etymologies do)? “Pluck yew”? Jesus fucking fuck.
There, off my chest for now. If you feel the same, feel free to vent here. Grr.
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### Author:  [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)
#### Post date: [July 26, 2014, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/2 "2014-07-26T18:05:03Z")
My favorite for unlikely is Found Under Carnal Knowledge (with several options in each case).
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### Author:  [@DChord568](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DChord568)
#### Post date: [July 26, 2014, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/3 "2014-07-26T19:18:22Z")
Here’s a minor one: I’d wager most folks think the name of the fast food chain Arby’s comes from R B for roast beef.
In fact in comes from the name of the founders, the **R** affel **B** rothers.
This was in the news here in my hometown recently, as the very first Arby’s restaurant in the world opened here 50 years ago this past Wednesday. One of the brothers and a bunch of present and former executives and employees were on hand for a celebration.
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### Author:  [@weef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/weef)
#### Post date: [July 26, 2014, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/4 "2014-07-26T20:49:19Z")
I never knew this one:
The official title of the USA PATRIOT Act, a 2001 Act of the U.S. Congress, is “Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism (USA PATRIOT) Act of 2001”
That’s a serious WTF…
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### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [July 26, 2014, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/5 "2014-07-26T21:01:49Z")
My favorite is one that I have never found any corroboration for, but it was in my How and Why book of Robots and Computers – a free-swimming robot for monitoring whales called the Motorized Observation Biotelemetry Yacht Data and Control.
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### Author:  [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)
#### Post date: [July 26, 2014, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/6 "2014-07-26T21:07:54Z")
so they want to make you BARF (backronyms are really fucked).
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### Author:  [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/7 "2014-07-27T00:05:50Z")
Tip=To insure promptness. Give me a break.
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### Author:  [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/8 "2014-07-27T00:11:57Z")
Want to send me into an apoplectic, frothing at the mouth rage? Just tell me that “freezing the balls of a brass monkey” is derived from blah fucking blah cannonballs fucking blah…
Death cannot come quickly enough for some people.
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### Author:  [@D18](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D18)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/9 "2014-07-27T00:59:12Z")
Huh. I had never heard of backronyms before now. The SDMB, where even rants fight ignorance!
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### Author:  [@Flywheel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flywheel)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/10 "2014-07-27T01:03:22Z")
> [@LawMonkey](#):
>
> I hate them with an intensity suitable for the Pit
You mean the place where we roast things from **beard to tail**?
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### Author:  [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/11 "2014-07-27T01:05:24Z")
> [@weef](#):
>
> I never knew this one:
>
> The official title of the USA PATRIOT Act, a 2001 Act of the U.S. Congress, is “Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism (USA PATRIOT) Act of 2001”
>
> That’s a serious WTF…
Yep. Congresscritters are some of the worst offenders, and that particular bill, among its many flaws, is one of the most egregious examples.
> [@samclem](#):
>
> Tip=To insure promptness. Give me a break.
_twitch_ I’d forgotten about that one.
> [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](#):
>
> Want to send me into an apoplectic, frothing at the mouth rage? Just tell me that “freezing the balls of a brass monkey” is derived from blah fucking blah cannonballs fucking blah…
>
> Death cannot come quickly enough for some people.
And that one I’d never heard of before, and I’m torn between wanting to look it up and knowing it’d just irritate me if I did.
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### Author:  [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/12 "2014-07-27T01:44:31Z")
> [@weef](#):
>
> I never knew this one:
>
> The official title of the USA PATRIOT Act, a 2001 Act of the U.S. Congress, is “Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism (USA PATRIOT) Act of 2001”
>
> That’s a serious WTF…
Well, that actually makes a great deal more sense than trying to associate it in some way with the fundamental principles of Patriotism.
One of my favs from earlier eras was BOAC – Bastards Overseas Avoiding Conscription – since people employed by crown corporations were exempt from military service.
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### Author:  [@LC\_Strawhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LC_Strawhouse)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/13 "2014-07-27T01:57:26Z")
There’s also an urban legend that the word “mafia” is derived from “Morte Alla Francia, Italia Avanti”, referring to a 13th-century conflict with France. :dubious:
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### Author:  [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/14 "2014-07-27T02:03:37Z")
You guys who don’t like backronyms won’t like “[Buseyisms](http://www.garybusey.com/gary_busey_buseyisms.html).”
(And yeah, I think backronyms are kinda stupid too.)
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### Author:  [@LawMonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LawMonkey)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/15 "2014-07-27T02:32:52Z")
> [@EmilyG](#):
>
> You guys who don’t like backronyms won’t like “[Buseyisms](http://www.garybusey.com/gary_busey_buseyisms.html).”
>
> (And yeah, I think backronyms are kinda stupid too.)
Ooh boy. Yep, hate those too, with some extra hate on top because they’ve got self-help/inspirational nonsense woven in as well. “CHAMPION – Creating Happiness And Magical Progress In Overcoming Negativity”? Seriously, dude? Where the fuck is that barf smiley when you need it?
(Also, because train wreck, I scrolled down and found this gem: “WAR – Women And Religion”. What in the actual fuck, Gary?)
> [@LC\_Strawhouse](#):
>
> There’s also an urban legend that the word “mafia” is derived from “Morte Alla Francia, Italia Avanti”, referring to a 13th-century conflict with France. :dubious:
You know, I obviously wasn’t thinking clearly when I started this thread. If I had been, I’d have realized that it would dredge up all sorts of shitty folk etymologies that I’d forgotten about. Oh well. I guess this is what passes for RO with me.
> [@jtur88](#):
>
> One of my favs from earlier eras was BOAC – Bastards Overseas Avoiding Conscription – since people employed by crown corporations were exempt from military service.
This, on the other hand, sounds like a perfectly legitimate 20th century military acronym coinage, like America’s good ol’ ‘fubar’ (fucked up beyond all recognition/repair) and ‘snafu’ (situation normal, all fucked up). BOAC’s not a pre-existing English word that I’m aware of, so it’s not like anyone built a bullshit acronym out of it after the fact. Now, if it had been, say, “BOAS”, with “service” as the last word, it’d be different.
Incidentally, returning to my OP: As I mentioned, [clinical trials](http://www.wikidoc.org/index.php/Acronyms_of_Clinical_Trial_Names) are what got this particular burr up my ass again. They absolutely, positively will not do a trial, so far as I can tell, without figuring out some “clever” name for it. And they’ve hit on a way to be still more irritating about it: They don’t even bother to stick to initial letters any more. Any letter, initial, medial, or final, may be pressed into service to get our name; it’s just as fair to ignore any words that don’t fit. While I suppose, if I’m going to think logically about it, this is preferable to the sorts of contortions that Congress prefers to get its acronyms on, but apparently logic departs me when acronyms are involved and it just pisses me off more. Grr.
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### Author:  [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/16 "2014-07-27T02:50:50Z")
> [@LawMonkey](#):
>
> Incidentally, returning to my OP: As I mentioned, [clinical trials](http://www.wikidoc.org/index.php/Acronyms_of_Clinical_Trial_Names) are what got this particular burr up my ass again. They absolutely, positively will not do a trial, so far as I can tell, without figuring out some “clever” name for it. And they’ve hit on a way to be still more irritating about it: They don’t even bother to stick to initial letters any more. Any letter, initial, medial, or final, may be pressed into service to get our name; it’s just as fair to ignore any words that don’t fit. While I suppose, if I’m going to think logically about it, this is preferable to the sorts of contortions that Congress prefers to get its acronyms on, but apparently logic departs me when acronyms are involved and it just pisses me off more. Grr.
**YES.** This was what I was going to mention, since I’ve seen so many of these. It’s like they come up with the clever pseudo-acronym first to sound all inspiring and then fold, spindle, and mutilate what’s going on in the trial to fit that series of letters somehow, even if it kills them.
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### Author:  [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/17 "2014-07-27T02:54:55Z")
I’ve been out of the clinical trial game for almost eight years now, but back in my day we didn’t have “cute” names for them.
This may be due to the fact that I worked for a humorless German company. A number is more than adequate to differentiate the large-cell lung cancer trial from the small-cell trial. Although that drug did turn out to be counter-indicated. Oops.
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### Author:  [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 10:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/18 "2014-07-27T10:31:06Z")
> [@jtur88](#):
>
> One of my favs from earlier eras was BOAC – Bastards Overseas Avoiding Conscription – since people employed by crown corporations were exempt from military service.
Airline acronyms are a genre unto themselves: my favourite was always Let Us Fuck The Hostesses And Not Say Anything.
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### Author:  [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/19 "2014-07-27T11:09:32Z")
> [@LC\_Strawhouse](#):
>
> There’s also an urban legend that the word “mafia” is derived from “Morte Alla Francia, Italia Avanti”, referring to a 13th-century conflict with France. :dubious:
I’d heard it stood for _Mothers And Fathers Italian Association_. OK, I heard that from a stand-up comic…
I can get onboard with this rant. I spent 37 years working in or for the Navy, so I encountered more than my share of acronyms, many of which were idiotic. The absolute worst, tho, was at the last command before I retired. I had to take a [photo](http://s72.photobucket.com/user/fairychatmom/media/Knight%20cup/ffd07ba0-89be-4b50-a266-116af8dc3dd8_zpsabebd5f0.jpg.html?sort=3&o=0)of it to share.
This was an award to recognize outstanding work and stuff. Because cash money was too tacky?? Oh, and they called it a chalice. Seriously. In case you can’t tell, it’s a cheap plastic cup, one step above a disposable cup. An entire committee came up with it. Much mocking ensued. My boss knew how much I hated those things, so he made sure I got one at my retirement ceremony. Cracked me up.
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### Author:  [@Jumpbass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jumpbass)
#### Post date: [July 27, 2014, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hate-backronyms-and-folk-etymologies/694110/20 "2014-07-27T11:44:09Z")
Calvin and Hobbes managed to satirize the idea with the Get Rid Of Slimy girlS club. Sounds like something a six year old would come up with.
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