I think it’s sometimes a matter of people only hearing the first half of a sentence, or only selected words.
Me: Well, we can’t ask Dan; he’ll be in New York by then.
Them: No, Dan will be in New York by then.
Me: I just said that.
Me: Of course, I couldn’t go down Main Street because they’re doing construction.
Them: They’re doing construction on Main Street.
Me: I KNOW.
I hate being put in the position of looking as if I didn’t know the condition of Main Street, or Dan’s schedule. And I hate being “corrected” when I wasn’t wrong in the first place. Then again, perhaps these people are just on autopilot, and do that with everyone.
Stop talking. Look them straight in the eye with a slightly (only slightly) less than pleased look on your face. Clear your throat if you have to get their attention.
When they stop, do not say anything until they address you directly.
Then CALMLY ask if they have been listening to what you have been saying, or something equivalent.
Most people will get the clue.
Worst case scenario, I will end the conversation right there and tell the other person that we can continue when they aren’t so distracted, or when they’re willing to listen, or something like that (depending on circumstances).
If it’s just a matter of patronizing tone of voice, I suggest adopting the exact same tone of voice in response. Won’t take 'em long to figure it out. The humor of it can be used to break the tension.
Then again, you might be dealing with a Gerald. He’s a former friend who would get specific Ideas stuck in his head and only listen for things that matched up with his fixation. Nothing you said that contradicted or failed to agree with his intent would get past the filter. He could be incredibly frustrating to deal with and I eventually got rid of him because of it.
In that case, GOOD LUCK.
On first reading, I thought that it was the current/prior teacher doing this, consistent with the talking over and reading aloud stuff. On re-reading it, it sounds as though this was next year’s teacher doing this. If this was the new teacher, I would schedule a meeting with her, NOW, to make sure she was not just having a bad day. If she continues to behave in the same fashion, acts patronizing, or otherwise acts as though she will not work with you, get your daughter re-assigned to a new teacher, immediately, or (if the district is too small), make sure that the teacher knows that this will not be tolerated and go to the district Special Ed director with your concerns.
The overwhelming majority of both of my kids’ teachers were outstanding, but the two who were less than good caused problems with my kids’ educations with ramifications that extended well past the years they had them in class.
(I would make the effort to find out her actual attitudes before I got belligerent–this time of year, those teachers are running on adrenaline from preparing all the outgoing IEPs while absorbing all the incoming kids’ IEPs. She might have just had a bad day and I would want to give her the benefit of the doubt. However, that benefit only extends so far and I would not want to start next year with a problem. There is enough in the way of new school/new classroom/new classmates disruption at the beginning of the year to mask problems with the teacher, initially, and October is a bad time to be trying to sort it out and make corrections, particularly if they involve staff and room assignment issues.)
I’m very pro-active about my daughter’s education. I met up with the teacher over a month ago of my own doing. I called and scheduled a visit to the classroom and went to check it out, meet her, and get a feel for the school. So, she knows I’m all business when it comes to my kid.
I also have my own speech and behavior therapists that my daughter sees outside of school. These types of things get you taken more seriously when dealing with the special ed. teachers and departments. If they know they have someone (besides me) to be accountable to, they pretty much have to do what they say they are going to do.
It still annoys me in meetings when they pull this kind of crap. But since that was the last meeting with the old school, hopefully I made an impression on the new school people that says I’m not going to take any BS from them. It really is in their best interest to listen to what I have to say. I’m not one to take things lying down. And when it comes to my kid I’m in charge!! It is in their best interest to take me seriously. 