# "I have a gub. Give me all your cash." **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 13, 2021, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616 "2021-08-13T18:03:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2021, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/1 "2021-08-13T18:03:19Z")
From Woody Allen’s **Take the Money and Run** (1969). Woody Allen’s character hands the teller a note with that written on it. The teller, though, can’t read it, insisting that the note doesn’t say “gun”, it says “gub” The robbery fails, and Allen’s character is arrested. That wouldn’t happen in Real Life, right? > [@](#): > > # Bank Robbery In England Goes Awry Because Of Some Bad Handwriting > > Alan Slattery fled empty-handed after tellers struggled to read his threatening note. > > Bad handwriting [thwarted a bank robbery](https://www.sussex.police.uk/news/sussex/news/court-results/jail-term-for-man-who-robbed-one-bank-and-tried-to-rob-two-others/) in southern England because tellers couldn’t decipher the robber’s threatening note. > > Retiree Alan Slattery, 67, fled empty-handed from a Nationwide Building Society branch in Eastbourne in March after employees struggled to read his message demanding they hand over cash, [Sussex Police](https://www.sussex.police.uk/news/sussex/news/court-results/jail-term-for-man-who-robbed-one-bank-and-tried-to-rob-two-others/) revealed on Thursday. > > Police shared a picture of the note on Twitter. > > If you look hard enough, you can read: “Your screen won’t stop what I’ve got, just hand over the 10s and the 20s. Think about the other customers.” > **[Bank Robbery Goes Awry Because Of Some Bad Handwriting](https://www.huffpost.com/entry/bank-robber-botched-letter_n_61164839e4b01da700f49e0d)** > > Alan Slattery fled empty-handed after tellers struggled to read his threatening note. . ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2021, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/2 "2021-08-13T18:07:31Z")
This must be why so few doctors are successful bank robbers. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2021, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/3 "2021-08-13T22:03:41Z")
Apt natural. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2021, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/4 "2021-08-13T22:12:46Z")
isn’t it “abt natural” ---
**Author:** ![Melbourne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5e925/32.png) [@Melbourne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melbourne)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2021, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/5 "2021-08-13T22:56:53Z")
And who said that handwriting shouldn’t be taught in schools anymore… ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2021, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/6 "2021-08-13T23:10:00Z")
> [@wolfman](#): > > isn’t it “abt natural” Yes it is. Miss Frank tells Virgil it cannot be act natural, “That is a plain B.” ---
**Author:** ![kitap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b9e5f3/32.png) [@kitap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitap)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2021, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/7 "2021-08-13T23:19:26Z")
I listen to “Nights with Alice Cooper” on my way to work the other night and he was laughing over “I have a gub” then a few days later the morning radio guy mentioned this Slattery guy and all I could think was “I have a gub”. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2021, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/8 "2021-08-14T04:00:03Z")
> [@wolfman](#): > > isn’t it “abt natural” I was going from memory; give me a break. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2021, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/9 "2021-08-14T04:03:27Z")
I would be so endeared if a robber said “I haz a gub!1!1” that I might hand over cash just for that reason. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2021, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/10 "2021-08-14T04:12:36Z")
Sorry, I wish I hadn’t said that, and had it in the back of my mind after posting it. I had a bitchy day at work(remote), fighting tooth and nail for what had been signed off on at what had not been on a Friday EOB Deadline. And struck at an inaccuracy. Ultimately, mea culpa. honestly sorry. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2021, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/11 "2021-08-14T04:17:29Z")
Outside of all that , I try to avoid major typos be reading my text before publishing, but does anybody else find “And struck at an inaccuracy.” A hell of a tongue twister? ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2021, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/12 "2021-08-14T04:56:35Z")
> [@wolfman](#): > > Sorry, I wish I hadn’t said that, and had it in the back of my mind after posting it. I had a bitchy day at work(remote), fighting tooth and nail for what had been signed off on at what had not been on a Friday EOB Deadline. And struck at an inaccuracy. > > Ultimately, mea culpa. honestly sorry. Don’t worry about it. I thought I did pretty well for a semi-obscure reference I haven’t seen in years. And we do want to be accurate. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats2)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2021, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-have-a-gub-give-me-all-your-cash/948616/13 "2021-08-23T12:02:41Z")
“Pens? Looks more like Ben’s to me.”