# I haven't had sex in three years **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 25, 2013, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779 "2013-11-25T21:22:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/161 "2013-11-27T12:44:30Z")
**Jesse** , I am wondering why you keep returning to this thread. You clearly are not interested in anything anyone else has to say. You aren’t even venting very much if that’s what this is for. Obviously some people here are trying very hard to help you and you are just basically spitting in their faces; does that give you pleasure? I really am curious about your motives. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/162 "2013-11-27T13:04:19Z")
> [@kayT](#): > > **Jesse** , I am wondering why you keep returning to this thread. You clearly are not interested in anything anyone else has to say. You aren’t even venting very much if that’s what this is for. Obviously some people here are trying very hard to help you and you are just basically spitting in their faces; does that give you pleasure? I really am curious about your motives. He’s trying to prove to himself and everyone else just how worthless and pittiful he really is.\* \*Rules forbid the “t” word. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/163 "2013-11-27T13:29:21Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > He’s trying to prove to himself and everyone else just how worthless and pittiful he really is. We’ve had other posters on the SDMB with the exact same MO. They don’t generally last very long because once people lose interest in them they have to push the envelope. Not saying that this is what JP will do, but the pattern has been established. As long as he keeps it to one thread and I can ignore it, I’m fine. ---
**Author:** ![SerafinaPekala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@SerafinaPekala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SerafinaPekala)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/164 "2013-11-27T13:41:57Z")
> [@Jesse\_Pinkman](#): > > I’ve tried both CBT with multiple therapists and many different antidepressants. They don’t work. Well there you have it. In the absence of any treatable disease, you just need a personality transplant. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/165 "2013-11-27T14:58:47Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > He’s trying to prove to himself and everyone else just how worthless and pittiful he really is.\* That seems to be it. Some people just enjoy wallowing in self pity and want everyone else to keep trying to help them. But they can’t acknowledge that it’s good advice or it might work because then people will stop paying attention to them and saying “poor baby…” I wouldn’t call it trolling since trolling is done with malice. It’s more of a sincerely misguided sense of how to get attention. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/166 "2013-11-27T15:04:37Z")
> [@Falchion](#): > > I don’t know about you, but I’ve had great success going up to women in bars and telling them that my life has no meaning if I cannot make them great with child. Thread won. ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/167 "2013-11-27T15:10:57Z")
The guy is clearly very depressed. He’s discouraged by the fact that he feels that he has tried very hard to change his situation and has failed. Obviously giving up is not the answer and neither is getting pity from strangers, but the fact that so many posters see his defeatist attitude and are inspired to heap scorn on him or insult him is sadly typical. How is it fun to kick a depressed person and make him feel worse? ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/168 "2013-11-27T15:18:44Z")
> [@AnaMen](#): > > The guy is clearly very depressed. He’s discouraged by the fact that he feels that he has tried very hard to change his situation and has failed. I don’t think many people are convinced that he HAS tried very hard to change his situation, hence the “scorn”. Every suggestion is met with “Tried it once, didn’t work” or “Won’t work, not going to try it”. That’s not the hallmark of someone who is working hard to change his situation. ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/169 "2013-11-27T15:20:18Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > I wouldn’t call it trolling since trolling is done with malice. It’s more of a sincerely misguided sense of how to get attention. Let’s keep any possible talk of “Troll or not?” out of MPSIMS and reserved only for the Pit. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/170 "2013-11-27T15:27:04Z")
My apology. I was trying to avoid the accusation and obviously stumbled into it instead. I’ll give a wider berth next time. ---
**Author:** ![Jesse\_Pinkman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@Jesse\_Pinkman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesse_Pinkman)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/171 "2013-11-27T15:52:47Z")
I made this topic because I needed to whine and I need people to tell me to sack up and deal with it. Since it is much less consequential to do so with faceless strangers online, I did it here and I got the response I knew deep down that I was going to get. I did it to remind myself that I’m being irrational. I’m sorry to anyone I may have annoyed and I thank you all for your advice. ---
**Author:** ![Jesse\_Pinkman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@Jesse\_Pinkman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesse_Pinkman)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/172 "2013-11-27T16:11:45Z")
Also, I should mention I’m not unemployed anymore, and I’m sorry I didn’t make that clearer. I got a job back in August. I was laid off in February and took a temporary job to keep money coming in, but during that time period I was anxious, depressed and didn’t know what to do. I had a lot of sleepless nights wondering if I was going to find something by the time my lease expired or be forced to move back in with my parents, putting me back in the same situation I was in when I graduated college. It’s clear to me why I wasn’t getting any then. I have nothing to complain about now that things are on the up. ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/173 "2013-11-27T16:31:47Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > I don’t think many people are convinced that he HAS tried very hard to change his situation, hence the “scorn”. > > Every suggestion is met with “Tried it once, didn’t work” or “Won’t work, not going to try it”. That’s not the hallmark of someone who is working hard to change his situation. Yes, it’s the hallmark of a defeatist loser. That doesn’t mean he hasn’t tried or won’t succeed if he tries harder, I’m just having trouble seeing why anyone would enjoy deriding him. Try harder, Pinkman… Bigger losers than you have succeeded, so you can too. If you need to approach 1000 girls you’re attracted to in order to find one that feels the same way about you, get busy. Three a day and you’ll score within a year! ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/174 "2013-11-27T16:46:11Z")
> [@AnaMen](#): > > Bigger losers than you have succeeded, so you can too. Cite? ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/175 "2013-11-27T17:04:59Z")
> [@Bob Ducca](#): > > Cite? Manson ---
**Author:** ![SerafinaPekala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@SerafinaPekala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SerafinaPekala)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/176 "2013-11-27T17:12:21Z")
> [@AnaMen](#): > > Manson Charles or Marilyn ??? ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/177 "2013-11-27T17:12:45Z")
Even babyrapists often have girlfriends or wives. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/178 "2013-11-27T17:18:31Z")
> [@AnaMen](#): > > Even babyrapists often have girlfriends or wives. I doubt the OP will find that particularly encouraging. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/179 "2013-11-27T17:31:54Z")
“I’m a bigger loser than a babyrapist!” ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2013, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779/180 "2013-11-27T17:38:25Z")
> [@Jophiel](#): > > “I’m a bigger loser than a babyrapist!” Not all babyrapists are losers, some are quite successful at it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-havent-had-sex-in-three-years/674779.md?page=10)