# I heard a rumor that the US Immigration Department **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 11, 2014, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579 "2014-06-11T23:31:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/58956e/32.png) [@Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emtar_KronJonDerSohn)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/21 "2014-06-12T03:07:39Z")
Q. Knock knock Q2. Whose their? A. Obama ! was borne in Kanye!!! Lolololzzz ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/22 "2014-06-12T03:28:19Z")
> [@Mr\_Quatro](#): > > Yes, that’s southern for reading test: [http://www.reading-tests.com/](http://www.reading-tests.com/) We’re gonna need a smaller bigot. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/23 "2014-06-12T04:13:06Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Maybe the M. in Richard M. Nixon stands for “Barrack,” which is almost Obama’s first name. Ah, but soldiers sleep in barracks. You know who else slept? ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/24 "2014-06-12T04:36:05Z")
Lying dogs? ---
**Author:** ![Peanuthead](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peanuthead/32/360_2.png) [@Peanuthead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peanuthead)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/25 "2014-06-12T06:05:00Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Maybe the M. in Richard M. Nixon stands for “Barrack,” which is almost Obama’s first name. Aha! The M stands for Muslim! Richard Nixon is Barak Obama’s real father! Take that you birthers! ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/26 "2014-06-12T18:34:34Z")
There’s got to be a corollary to Gaudere’s Law that works for this thread. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/27 "2014-06-12T18:55:37Z")
> [@Mr\_Quatro](#): > > I’m already on someone’s radar I just wanted to make them laugh 😃 We’re laughing at you instead of with you, but at least we _are_ laughing. Win for you…I guess. ---
**Author:** ![Mr\_Quatro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bc8723/32.png) [@Mr\_Quatro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr_Quatro)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/28 "2014-06-12T19:12:10Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > We’re laughing at you instead of with you, but at least we _are_ laughing. > Win for you…I guess. Par for the course for me … from great debates to elections to IMHO to MPSIMS I keep stumbling … I can’t wait to get back to the game room (pre season is just two more months). Maybe I’m in the wrong section … I need one that is for silly people that can’t spell 😃 Bing Dictionary mun·dane 1.ordinary: commonplace, not unusual, and often boring 2.of this world: relating to matters of this world Bing Dictionary point·less 1.without purpose or benefit: having no purpose, use, or sense, or any positive or beneficial effect ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/29 "2014-06-12T19:16:49Z")
> [@Mr\_Quatro](#): > > **Which US President said, “Let my people go”** That would be Charlton Heston, president of the National Rifle Association, in his role as Moses in “The Ten Commandments.” What did I win? ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/30 "2014-06-12T19:44:36Z")
> [@Emtar\_KronJonDerSohn](#): > > Q. Knock knock > Q2. Whose their? > A. Obama ! was borne in Kanye!!! > > Lolololzzz I hert that joke, but a a differant way: Q. Knock knock? A- Benghazi! ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/31 "2014-06-12T19:48:01Z")
> [@bup](#): > > I hert that joke, but a a differant way: > Q. Knock knock? > A- Benghazi! I heard that in a different way. Knock knock! Who’s there? Interrupting Issa! Interr– Benghazi! ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2014, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/32 "2014-06-12T20:31:09Z")
That’s actually funny. Disqualified. ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2014, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/33 "2014-06-13T11:08:55Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#): > > **INS Examiner:** All right, here’s your last question. What was the cause of the Civil War? > **Apu Nahasapeemapetilon:** Actually, there were numerous causes. Aside from the obvious schism between the abolitionists and the anti-abolitionists, there were economic factors, both domestic and inter– > **INS Examiner:** Wait, wait…just say slavery. Gah, this is me in real life at the moment, studying for a citizenship test. They’ve been changed in the last year or so to have more questions about history and general culture, and I’m having a hell of a time not overthinking the questions. There’s one that pops up on the practice tests quite a bit: He defeated the Vikings in battle: 1. King Arthur 2. Harold II 3. Alfred the Great 4. George III. I keep wanting to go with Harold, who defeated them in battle at Stamford Bridge in 1066, but by the official government book it’s Alfred (who did a deal with them, dammit – my Anglo-Saxon expert colleague concurs with me there.) I’ve got the book practially memorised, but it’s driving me crazy, as my real life responses to most of the questions start out with, ‘Welll, sort of, I guess…’ ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2014, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/34 "2014-06-13T13:06:57Z")
Who defeated the Vikings? Well, in the Super Bowl, practically everybody… ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2014, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/35 "2014-06-13T13:13:54Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > What does dialup have to do with spelling, grammar, or the fact that Nixon didn’t pardon the Watergate burglars and Obama isn’t a Muslim? Well, sometimes the 1s get stuck the other way blocking traffic and you start to miss letters because you don’t get all the data so you have to shake the cord a few times to clear the clog. It doesn’t happen with broadband because they use greased wiring, that’s why it’s so much faster. ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2014, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/36 "2014-06-14T14:54:35Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Who defeated the Vikings? Well, in the Super Bowl, practically everybody… I wouldn’t have got that one, either, as I do’nt follow US football at all 🙂 Still, I remembered that it’s others who nominate, but the Queen appoints peers for the House of Lords thanks to Blackadder, Baldrick, and a slightly confused Prince George. ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2014, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/37 "2014-06-14T16:41:08Z")
Q. Did you hear about the thread full of non sequiturs? A. Banana! ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2014, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/38 "2014-06-15T00:37:48Z")
Enough jokes about the OP. This question makes me wonder - what country has the toughest visa, residency, or citizenship exam? I’m not asking what is the most difficult country to immigrate to in general, as there can be significant non-academic requirements as well (e.g. have job offer, lack criminal record, fulfill medical criteria, win a lottery, etc.). It seems that the US, UK, Canada, etc. have pretty easy exams, generally consisting of multiple choice and/or short answer questions that come out of a _short_ list of source materials. E.g. questions like “Where is the Statue of Liberty?” rather than “Discuss the history of the Rocky Mountain states with specific reference to economic, social, and religious conflicts from the early westward expansion days to the present. What was the most significant factor in the development of the culture of Denver, Colorado?” ---
**Author:** ![Grestarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grestarian/32/3227_2.png) [@Grestarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grestarian)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2014, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/39 "2014-06-15T01:06:25Z")
> [@Mr\_Quatro](#): > > Go ahead pick on an old man on dial up … must I remind you that Gov Christi had skeletons in his closet and that the San Diego Chargers almost went all the way to the Super Bowl? Oh THANKS! :mad: You just had to remind us when my brother is visiting from San Francisco. Now he’s going read this thread and remind me that I lost that bet.:smack: –G! There i was, trying to just ignore this thread and… ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2014, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579/40 "2014-06-15T05:33:52Z")
> [@robert\_columbia](#): > > This question makes me wonder - what country has the toughest visa, residency, or citizenship exam? France. The entire exam is written in some kind of secret code. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-heard-a-rumor-that-the-us-immigration-department/690579.md?page=3)