# I hesitate to ask, but... **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [January 14, 2013, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200 "2013-01-14T18:34:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/1 "2013-01-14T18:34:02Z")
…why was my thread in MPSIMS about dick sucking closed? Was it the naughty language or nature of the subject matter? When I composed that fine work of art, I did so with tongue firmly planted in cheek, but there was a serious question(s) in there too. I don’t think I used any illegal words, I didn’t even tell anyone to fuck a cactus. Should I have put that in a different forum? I thought about putting it into the Pit but I wasn’t really pitting anyone. Can **twickster,** the mod whom closed the thread, please explain? All she did IIRC was call the thread a “trainwreck”. Other posters appeared to be having fun, then the hammer came quickly. > **[Women who won't fellate...](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=678956)** > > Women who won’t suck cock, I must ask: why not? On what grounds do you refuse to throat the schlong? Is it icky to you? “Oh, it’s hairy down there!” Is it that you have half the money and all the pussy so you feel you are under no compulsion to do... ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/2 "2013-01-14T18:44:04Z")
Since I reported the thread to be dealt with by the forum mods, I’ll begin by asking “Seriously? Did you start posting here yesterday?” That was obviously a trainwreck in the making, as anyone who has been here more than a week would know. You poisoned the well from the beginning. In my opinion, you were lucky not to get a warning for trolling. In particular I would point to this: > [@](#): > > Is it that you have half the money and all the pussy so you feel you are under no compulsion to do so? You’ve already “earned your free pass from performing such duties”? You could possibly have started a thread in IMHO on the subject by using less inflammatory phrasing. Or you could have gone the other way and started one in the Pit. But it clearly wasn’t suited to MPSIMS. If you’re going to do such a thread, go one way or the other with it and start one in the proper forum. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/3 "2013-01-14T18:47:45Z")
I’d like to hear some responses to the question so I’d like to see a less-inflammatory OP posted somewhere myself. I think (if it’s done right) it’s a perfectly valid question. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/4 "2013-01-14T18:49:55Z")
Doesn’t seem that bad to me, and certainly not worthy of a red-alert lockdown; the “offensive” phrasing is clearly meant to be facetious. But alas, what would I know of such things? ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/5 "2013-01-14T18:50:05Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I’d like to hear some responses to the question so I’d like to see a less-inflammatory OP posted somewhere myself. I think (if it’s done right) it’s a perfectly valid question. As I recall, we’ve had similar threads in the past. **FoieGrasIsEvil** just phrased things in an unnecessarily obnoxious way. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/6 "2013-01-14T18:51:42Z")
Yeah, despite the punning, Hypnotoad’s post summed it up. Legit question, but phrased assholishly enough that it seemed doomed to end poorly. I wouldn’t have closed it though, as everything seemed to be going fine at that point. Some jokes, no rule breaking, all civil. I don’t operate under the assumption that things will get worse. So long as everyone’s good, I’m good. No need for the preemptive strike. This is not a war; it’s a message board. If it turns into a disaster, then close it. If not, leave it alone. Easy peasy. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/7 "2013-01-14T18:51:43Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Doesn’t seem that bad to me, and certainly not worthy of a red-alert lockdown; the “offensive” phrasing is clearly meant to be facetious. But alas, what would I know of such things? Just because it might have been facetious doesn’t mean that some posters won’t choose to take it literally and pick a fight over it. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/8 "2013-01-14T18:53:33Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Yeah, despite the punning, Hypnotoad’s post summed it up. Legit question, but phrased assholishly enough that it seemed doomed to end poorly. I wouldn’t have closed it though, as everything seemed to be going fine at that point. Some jokes, no rule breaking, all civil. I don’t operate under the assumption that things will get worse. So long as everyone’s good, I’m good. No need for the preemptive strike. This is not a war; it’s a message board. If it turns into a disaster, then close it. Easy peasy. It would be a lot simpler if the OP just went ahead and took the suggestion to open a less offensively phrased thread in the correct forum. Problem solved. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/9 "2013-01-14T18:55:00Z")
OK, I will rephrase and try in IMHO. **Colibri** , no, I’ve been around long enough to be confused by what is and isn’t offensive to mod/board sensibilities, just like everyone else. _Of course_ the OP was meant to be offensive…but that in and of itself is not a violation of any rules, is it? The bit you parsed is an Eddie Murphy joke reference. It was supposed to be crude, but with an honest question buried therein. And again, I didn’t put it into the Pit because I wasn’t pitting anyone or anything (at least not directly). And if you please…what in particular makes a thread not suitable for MPSIMS versus the same thread in IMHO? If I get what you are saying, the way my OP was worded it would _only_ have been suitable for the Pit which is strange because there’s plenty of foul language and questionable topics/threads in both of those forums. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/10 "2013-01-14T18:56:09Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Doesn’t seem that bad to me, and certainly not worthy of a red-alert lockdown; the “offensive” phrasing is clearly meant to be facetious. **But alas, what would I know of such things?** Indeed! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/11 "2013-01-14T18:57:21Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Just because it might have been facetious doesn’t mean that some posters won’t choose to take it literally and pick a fight over it. But why does that necessarily make a topic, obnoxiously worded or not, taboo? People argue with each other all the time around here about all manner of things. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/12 "2013-01-14T19:27:26Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > Of course the OP was meant to be offensive…but that in and of itself is not a violation of any rules, is it? If the OP was intended to be offensive, then it was in the wrong forum, so yeah, it was against the rules. And what forum it actually belonged in depended on which was more important to you: getting an answer to your question, or slamming women who don’t give blowjobs. So rather than moving it, it would be better for you to decide which kind of thread you want and start a new thread in the right forum. > [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > But why does that necessarily make a topic, obnoxiously worded or not, taboo? People argue with each other all the time around here about all manner of things. As has already been said, the topic itself isn’t at all taboo. We’ve had threads on it before. It was just that your OP was a bit too obnoxiously worded for MPSIMS. (In any case, since you were asking for opinions that wasn’t the correct forum for it anyway.) If you want a friendly discussion of the subject, try a less provocative phrasing in IMHO. If you want to criticize women who don’t like to give blowjobs, then you can start a thread in the Pit. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/13 "2013-01-14T19:35:15Z")
**Colibri** has done a fine job of articulating my concerns: It was in the wrong forum and phrased in a way to be as offensive as possible. (As it says in the FAQs: “Sex: The medical approach is OK, the Penthouse approach is not.”) If it’s a serious question, try again in IMHO. If it’s an attempt to offend people and or bitch about the fact that you’re not getting your dick sucked as often as you would like, take it to the Pit. And if you were just trying to be funny, you failed. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/14 "2013-01-14T20:03:27Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > **Colibri** has done a fine job of articulating my concerns: It was in the wrong forum and phrased in a way to be as offensive as possible. (As it says in the FAQs: “Sex: The medical approach is OK, the Penthouse approach is not.”) > > If it’s a serious question, try again in IMHO. If it’s an attempt to offend people and or bitch about the fact that you’re not getting your dick sucked as often as you would like, take it to the Pit. > > And if you were just trying to be funny, you failed. Yeah, **Colibri** did a good job clearing that up in his last post(s). I suppose myself (and others, I can’t be alone on this) tend to just throw topics of randomness into MPSIMS due to the nature of the forum without necessarily considering the other forums as being a more appropriate place for the topic at hand. And as for your bit of snark there…you wound be to the inner core. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/15 "2013-01-14T21:52:38Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > The bit you parsed is an Eddie Murphy joke reference. It was supposed to be crude, but with an honest question buried therein. It is my recollection that Richard Pryor is the man who so eloquently stated the aforementioned opinion of women. ---
**Author:** ![colonial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/34f0e0/32.png) [@colonial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colonial)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/16 "2013-01-14T22:51:17Z")
This board only has one major problem, but it is a big problem, namely, the vast number of completely and totally moronic HS-JHS caliber threads having to with sex and bodily functions. Such threads got no reason to live, none of the goddam things, and it would be nice if a moratorium could be imposed on sexual, excremental, urinary and menstrual themes as a subject for OP. SDMB would be a better place for it. Most intellectually adult boards don’t let such utter garbage see the light of day. I hope administration here does see the light some day and adopts a policy promoting serious intellectual discourse only, as opposed to the juvenile trash the OP for this thread is all wadded up about. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/17 "2013-01-14T22:56:23Z")
And I hope they give me plenty of advance notice beforehand so I know not to renew my membership. ---
**Author:** ![colonial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/34f0e0/32.png) [@colonial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colonial)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/18 "2013-01-14T23:39:18Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > And I hope they give me plenty of advance notice beforehand so I know not to renew my membership. Go for it! Non-renewal by people who enjoy substandard OP topics would be part of the solution to eliminating such topics from the board. ---
**Author:** ![Lasciel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e79b87/32.png) [@Lasciel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lasciel)\ **Post date:** [January 14, 2013, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/19 "2013-01-14T23:48:22Z")
Go clutch your pearls. I think the “taboo topics” threads are interesting, and I also think society would be a better place if those topics weren’t taboo everywhere else. There’s too much fuss made over natural bodily functions in this world anyway - everyone shits, you know? ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2013, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200/20 "2013-01-15T00:05:12Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > It is my recollection that Richard Pryor is the man who so eloquently stated the aforementioned opinion of women. You may be right. Online the quote is also attributed to the move _DC Cab._ > [@colonial](#): > > This board only has one major problem, but it is a big problem, namely, > the vast number of completely and totally moronic HS-JHS caliber threads > having to with sex and bodily functions. Such threads got no reason to live, > none of the goddam things, and it would be nice if a moratorium could be > imposed on sexual, excremental, urinary and menstrual themes as a subject > for OP. SDMB would be a better place for it. > > Most intellectually adult boards don’t let such utter garbage see the light > of day. I hope administration here does see the light some day and adopts > a policy promoting serious intellectual discourse only, as opposed to the > juvenile trash the OP for this thread is all wadded up about. :rolleyes: [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-hesitate-to-ask-but/647200.md?page=2)