# I just about gave up on God today. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 4, 2008, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197 "2008-02-04T09:24:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/1 "2008-02-04T09:24:06Z")
I turned the game off when God in his great wisdom seemed determined to continue His obvious and baffling trend of giving the Patriots whatever they needed/wanted to prevent turnovers on downs. First it was the facemask on the fourth down, giving the Patriots more time to make their first score. Then, it was the challenge after the punt, which revealed a 12th Giant player with two of his toes still on the field when the ball was snapped. I couldn’t handle it anymore, after watching an entire season of the Patriots losing to mediocre teams like the Ravens and Eagles, but being saved from embarassment by Divine Fucking Intervention. My problem wasn’t that the Patriots were too good. It’s that they were too BAD, but they never had to pay for their stupid fucking mistakes. But our lord and savior has a sense of humor. He was just biding His time, waiting for the perfect moment to reveal the Patriots for the big, stupid fucking ugly ridiculous clown-nosed lucky ass bastards they are (were! ha!). The only way it could have been better is if a shark fell from the sky and swallowed Tom Brady whole as it plummetted to the earth. I’m only sorry that I missed half the game because I had lost my faith. I was all ready to convert to Hinduism and never turn my television set on again until I heard secondhand just how awesome the last part of the game was. I really wish I could have seen Manning shrug those three Patriots off like little drops of stupid, overpaid water. That’ll teach me to underestimate the Almighty, huh? ---
**Author:** ![Revenant\_Threshold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@Revenant\_Threshold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revenant_Threshold)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/2 "2008-02-04T10:04:44Z")
God loves a longshot. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![bbs2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e495f1/32.png) [@bbs2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bbs2k)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/3 "2008-02-04T11:34:56Z")
It’s in the Pit? Good. Fuck you. PS: I know that this only made you happier. I don’t care. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/4 "2008-02-04T12:09:27Z")
Sadly, another Manning gets a Super Bowl ring. But even more gladly, Bill Belicheat and Shady Brady do not. ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/5 "2008-02-04T13:34:02Z")
Ah, the wailing of the fans! The weeping and gnashing of teeth! Sweet music to my ears! I actually have nothing against the Patriot players, managers, owners, and assorted coaches. It’s the fans. And the sweet sound of their misery will sustain me for the entire off season. Tris ---
**Author:** ![Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Sophistry\_and\_Illusion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sophistry_and_Illusion)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/6 "2008-02-04T14:24:52Z")
[QUOTE=Triskadecamus] Ah, the wailing of the fans! The weeping and gnashing of teeth! Sweet music to my ears! I actually have nothing against the Patriot players, managers, owners, and assorted coaches. It’s the fans. And the sweet sound of their misery will sustain me for the entire off season. Tris [/QUOTE] No fucking shit. After a playoff game (I can’t remember which one), I heard a couple of Stop-n-Shop employees saying, “They might as well just cancel the rest of the season and go ahead and give us the Super Bowl trophy.” I haven’t given two shits about football for about 15 years now, but I like seeing people like that kicked in the proverbial nutsack. Arrogant shits got what they had coming. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/7 "2008-02-04T14:49:03Z")
I just wanna know why the _fuck_ God would be paying attention a football game? Seems to me there’s more important things out there for Him to worry about. You know, like global warming, Iraq, Bush, and shit, just about everything you can think of. I mean, aren’t we at risk of the entire universe flying apart if God get’s too distracted? ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Sensitive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/58956e/32.png) [@Darth\_Sensitive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Sensitive)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/8 "2008-02-04T14:55:26Z")
Why would he not care? Besides his team getting knocked off by the Giants in the Divisional Playoff game. He just figured he might as well root for the team that knocked the second coming of his son out of the playoffs. There’s a reason for the hole in the roof. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/9 "2008-02-04T14:59:53Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] I just wanna know why the _fuck_ God would be paying attention a football game? Seems to me there’s more important things out there for Him to worry about. You know, like global warming, Iraq, Bush, and shit, just about everything you can think of. … [/QUOTE] Like Wesley Snipes tax evasion trial. An Jesus is pretty busy, too, what with all the people in car accidents asking him to take the wheel and putting in appearances in breakfast foods. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/10 "2008-02-04T15:06:41Z")
[QUOTE=Mosier] The only way it could have been better is if a shark fell from the sky and swallowed Tom Brady whole as it plummetted to the earth. [/QUOTE] I would pay $400,000 to see that. ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/11 "2008-02-04T15:09:10Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] I just wanna know why the _fuck_ God would be paying attention a football game? Seems to me there’s more important things out there for Him to worry about. You know, like global warming, Iraq, Bush, and shit, just about everything you can think of. I mean, aren’t we at risk of the entire universe flying apart if God get’s too distracted? [/QUOTE] Same reason he helps boxers beat the shit out their opponent: he enjoys seeing the other side lose. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/12 "2008-02-04T15:11:25Z")
I’m sure glad I didn’t give a flying fuck _who_ won and just enjoyed the game. It was a fucking awesome football game. ---
**Author:** ![Slypork](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc29f/32.png) [@Slypork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slypork)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/13 "2008-02-04T15:37:04Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] I just wanna know why the _fuck_ God would be paying attention a football game? Seems to me there’s more important things out there for Him to worry about. You know, like global warming, Iraq, Bush, and shit, just about everything you can think of. I mean, aren’t we at risk of the entire universe flying apart if God get’s too distracted? [/QUOTE] Well, He used to only care about Notre Dame football but then realized that it was a lost cause. Besides, He had a bet with Satan about the game (Brady sold his soul for a 19-0 record and God didn’t want to see him get away with it). ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/14 "2008-02-04T15:41:29Z")
Belichich didn’t cheat. Since this is the Pit, I can say that anyone who thinks the Patriots “cheated” is a fucking moron who knows nothing about football. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/15 "2008-02-04T15:54:40Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] I just wanna know why the _fuck_ God would be paying attention a football game? Seems to me there’s more important things out there for Him to worry about. You know, like global warming, Iraq, Bush, and shit, just about everything you can think of. I mean, aren’t we at risk of the entire universe flying apart if God get’s too distracted? [/QUOTE] Dude, you yourself just gave eminent proof that God _is_ watching football, and probably knocking back a few Bud Lights while scarfing Doritos. And not just Super Bowl XLII, but since he’s omnipotent, _all possible variations of all Super Bowls ever_, a kind of ultra-bad TiVo. No wonder he’s too engrossed to meddle in things like “Global Warming” or “Iraq”. He’s got men on the ground to handle the little things, and sooner or later He’ll get right to reading their status reports, right after this fumble recovery. ---
**Author:** ![essell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/34f0e0/32.png) [@essell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/essell)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/16 "2008-02-04T15:58:55Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] I just wanna know why the _fuck_ God would be paying attention a football game? Seems to me there’s more important things out there for Him to worry about. You know, like global warming, Iraq, Bush, and shit, just about everything you can think of. I mean, aren’t we at risk of the entire universe flying apart if God get’s too distracted? [/QUOTE] Who the fuck do you think you are to define what God thinks is important and what’s not? You think God bases his prioritories on what you think? ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/17 "2008-02-04T16:00:50Z")
Maybe God can make sure that next time someone posts a sports rant in the Pit, they label it appropriately so that those of us who don’t give two flying fucks about a football game can avoid it. ---
**Author:** ![Slypork](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc29f/32.png) [@Slypork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slypork)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/18 "2008-02-04T16:06:56Z")
[QUOTE=essell] Who the fuck do you think you are to define what God thinks is important and what’s not? You think God bases his prioritories on what you think? [/QUOTE] Hey, lighten up there Sparky! It is everyone’s privilege, nay, his right, to criticize the boss. We bitch about what Bush does, you bitch about what Brown does. We second guess their decisions, gripe when they screw up and tell our buddies at the pub what we would do if we were in their place. This rolls all the way up to the Big Boss ™. If He decides to send a tornado to wipe out a mobile home park or gives a kid cancer, we should gripe about it. He gave us free will and we should exercise it as much as possible. Personally, I still haven’t forgiven him for letting ABC put that “sitcom” on about cavemen. I mean, what the hell was He thinking? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/19 "2008-02-04T16:11:43Z")
[QUOTE=essell] Who the fuck do you think you are to define what God thinks is important and what’s not? You think God bases his prioritories on what you think? [/QUOTE] It’s not really about 'priority," since an omnipotent deity has no need to prioritize anything. The issue is that God should have no reason to care who wins a football game at all. It’s not about putting it low on the list, it shouldn’t be on the list at all because it doesn’t matter whatsoever. It would also be a pretty piss poor God who would intervene in a football game but ignore the Sudan and Iraq and babies with horrible diseases and horrifically abused children and Rob Schneider movies and any number of other immediate, hideous atrocities. I will also say that I and I alone will determine what matters morally and what doesn’t. If God is not compatible with my own innate ethos, then God is not good. ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2008, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197/20 "2008-02-04T16:19:41Z")
[QUOTE=Diogenes the Cynic] Belichich didn’t cheat. Since this is the Pit, I can say that anyone who thinks the Patriots “cheated” is a fucking moron who knows nothing about football. [/QUOTE] Yeah, the NFL just randomly takes away 1st round draft picks, and levies heavy fines, for no apparent reason. :rolleyes: They cheated, and that’s why God took away their Super Bowl in the most painful way possible. Now, apparently, there’s evidence that suggests that they cheated in their first Super Bowl. If the NFL allows an investigation, I think we’ll find that they cheated in all of them (except yesterday’s). BTW, I don’t really believe in god, but it works in this case. Cheating bastards! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-about-gave-up-on-god-today/436197.md?page=2)