It’s bland, it’s heavy, it’s starchy, but it’s not poisonous or inedible. The stores are clean, and the food is sanitary. You could do a lot worse.
The hovering servers are kind of annoying, though.
I haven’t eaten in Applebees in well over a year but that vivid description perfectly fits my memory of the meal (which wasn’t nearly vomit-inducing at all, better than I could cook myself, but still did taste a little like a paper towl soaked in grease now that you mention it.)
Food poisoning doesn’t always take a long time to come on - Jim had a good bout once from chicken at Montana’s Steakhouse (we aren’t pukey folk - neither of us get stomach flus); we had dinner, then went to a movie, and he missed the last half of the movie from being in the washroom.
I hate that Applebees sells small hamburgers they think calling Sliders is appetizing. I can’t get the thought of a cook’s spit burger out of my mind when I see that on the menu, and it’s prominently displayed on the menu.
I think Sliders is a term borrowed from White Castle.
That, at least, isn’t Applebee’s fault. White Castle and Krystal popularized the notion of mini-burgers called sliders. It’s just the name for them now. They’ve been gaining traction in a lot of restaurants, not just Applebee’s.
I agree, though, the name has unpleasant connotations.
In his defense, it happens to be a science fact that Applebee’s is, as the technical literature puts it, absolutely fucking disgusting. Even the Applebee’s founder has repudiated her monstrous abortion of a quote-unquote “restaurant.” My favorite part of the website is “After Applebee’s” which is a blank page. Applebee’s: It ruins people’s lives.
So you don’t want to pay $12 for a salad, but you don’t mind paying $12 for a plate of fried, starchy, and greasy food?
And, just FYI, this “some sort of tortilla thing” you speak of is called a quesadilla. If you’ve never had one until now, then… wow.
Also, the “balls of chicken” aren’t really balls, in the traditional sense. They’re boneless buffalo wings and they’re more akin to nuggets.
From what it sounds like, dining at a restaurant seems to be a new experience for you. Most salads at your typical chain restaurant are going to run in the $12 range.
Lastly, you sound like an awesome customer to have. I am certain most servers would love to have you as their customer, and would even fight their fellow servers for the opportunity to serve you.
I figured as much. And when I pointed out that it couldn’t be any worse than a Chili’s, or any other place where the wait staff has flair, he ensured me that it could. And it is. He is a fan of hyperbole, but I actually do suspect he thinks Applebees is worse.
While the OP’s emoting over the dreadfulness of Applebees’ food is over the top, it is possible to get food poisoning onset in an hour or so after eating, generally due to Staph aureus or Bacillus cereus (B. cereus, now). If it’s the latter you could have longer incubation diarrhea to worry about. Do post followups on your symptoms, preferably with links to images of any diarrhea (explosive or otherwise) and urp, so that we can diagnose the precise cause.*
My general feeling about Applebees is that the food quality has declined somewhat in recent years, though it’s OK for a random lunch and better than the Olive Garden, for what that’s worth. I’ve never gotten sick from their food, in contrast to a certain upper-end seafood restaurant chain that a couple of years ago donated me and Mrs. J. a walloping case of norovirus transmitted through paella.
*Get well soon, weenie.
Either we are a very varied group here on the SDMB, or the quality at various Applebee’s is inconsistent. I’ll avoid the place when I can (which is nearly always), but if I must go there, I’ve learned the “safe” foods for me to eat.
The afore mentioned riblets, for example, caused me to start a Pit thread of my own. Those and the fries were WAY over salted and had some funky off taste. And I don’t think that the off taste was spoilage, I think it was some weird spice that they used. Imagine making a package of ramen noodles but using four or five flavor packs. It was that bad. I didn’t puke, but I felt pretty sick for the rest of the night, and I didn’t even eat half of it.
The one thing that I’ve found consistently edible is the Weight Watchers steak dinner.
As much as I dislike Applebee’s food, I don’t think that was enough time for it to have been the Bee. Particularly puking over and over. But I am not a doctor, nor do I watch one on TV.
This gets my vote. I’ve had the quality vary between separate occasions of dining at the same store.
It’s never made me ill, though. Often it’s pretty good.
You’ll be back as soon as they send you a coupon.
As far as the puking thing goes, there are reasons other than food poisoning. Sometimes we puke because something is simply gross.
But yeah, I’m thinking inconsistency from restaurant to restaurant. Quite a number of people on this board have waxed eloquent about the gourmet offerings of Subway. I’ve only eaten there twice and despite being famished both times, I could not finish my sandwich. Not even half way. Both times were at the same place.
I never noticed any difference between any of the standard, Restaurant-in-a-Box family chains - Applebees, TGIF, Ruby Tuesdays, Bennigans etc etc all tasted exactlyt he same to me. And I’m as much fo a restaurant snob as anyone, but they always struck me as serviceable if I was hungry and was stuck at an out of town hotel. The beer they serve is the same as I would drink elsewhere, and the burgers tend to be edible, if nothing to write home about.
As for the OP, picking the appertizer combo and complaining it is flavorless and bland strikes me as a tad silly. Of course it is bland. It is the blandest thing on the menu. It’s sole flavoring is salt to encourage the group of 5 people from Dunder Mifflin who share it at happy hour to buy more beer.
It’s not on your list, but now I’ve got a hankering for Red Robin. That there’s some good food.
It’s chain restaurant food. Some chain restaurant food is better than others. Within any chain, some stores do a better job than others. Personally I find Applebee’s serviceable. When they first started in the late 80s at the height of the fern bar craze they were better.
If you don’t like chain food don’t eat at chain restaurants. Don’t eat there, claim there were things you WOULD have ordered but you didn’t like the price, order something else where everything is deep-fried, then bitch.
And no, if you are sick this afternoon, it’s likely not from the food you ate at lunch.
Applebee’s isn’t what you’d call a destination restaurant, but it’s several huge steps up from fast food. I’d much rather get average food from Applebee’s than anything at a fast food restaurant. However, they do have an Oriental Grilled Chicken Salad that makes me have gastronomic climaxes the 4-5 times a year I have it. It’s the only thing I get there.
I’d rather get a Big Mac than riblets. I’d rather eat dog poo than riblets.