# I just blew that, right . . . (dating whiff, probably boring) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 14, 2012, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775 "2012-02-14T00:59:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ura-Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/51bf81/32.png) [@Ura-Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ura-Maru)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/1 "2012-02-14T00:59:36Z")
Just to clarify, there is pretty much no scenario in which a young woman would _casually_ mention that she wasn’t dating anyone and wasn’t doing anything on Valentine’s Day, in which she _wasn’t_ clearly inviting to be asked out, right? Assuming, just for the sake of argument, mind you, that the woman in question had been chatting with said guy for about 15 minutes and had an attractively energetic curiosity, a noticeable interest in art and music, and very, very black eyes? I mean I realize it’s not LIKELY, but I’d like to know if it’s POSSIBLE. I mean, I feel bad about it, but I don’t feel bad enough. Yet. – On an unrelated note, while waiting until later in the conversation to ask about personal info is great for avoiding awkwardness on a fumble, but leaves one vulnerable to having the other party have to run off to catch a bus . . . ---
**Author:** ![nikonikosuru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5f8ce5/32.png) [@nikonikosuru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nikonikosuru)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/2 "2012-02-14T01:23:32Z")
Black eyes as in…recently abused? ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/3 "2012-02-14T01:29:11Z")
Do you have any means to contact her? Find an event tomorrow or decide on something to do (dinner/movie/sport/boardgame marathon/whatever you think) and give her a call and ask her out. It’s not actually too late. If you don’t have her number, do you have her email? Email her. If you don’t have her email, are you friends on Facebook? Message her privately. Worst case scenario, you don’t date her on Valentine’s day. But you’re already not doing that, so what do you have to lose? ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/4 "2012-02-14T02:05:54Z")
> [@mnemosyne](#): > > If you don’t have her number, do you have her email? Email her. If you don’t have her email, are you friends on Facebook? Message her privately. And if she doesn’t have a Facebook, you could try streaking a sporting event holding up a sign with your phone number and V-day invite to her, and hope to get on the news. That’s how we did it back in my day! ---
**Author:** ![Ura-Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/51bf81/32.png) [@Ura-Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ura-Maru)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/5 "2012-02-14T03:05:50Z")
I don’t actually know her name, or have any way to contact her. She ran off for the bus before I got to that bit. Obviously an oversight on my part. I’m assuming she interpreted the lack of sally-forth as disinterest, which is not unreasonable. Besides, I’m too lazy to be a stalker OR an 80’s movie romantic guy. – > [@nikonikosuru](#): > > Black eyes as in…recently abused? Ah . . . no. Very dark irises. Caused by genetics, not punches. Jeez, am I coming off THAT creepy? ---
**Author:** ![Staggerlee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/staggerlee/32/3134_2.png) [@Staggerlee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Staggerlee)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/6 "2012-02-14T12:50:45Z")
> [@nikonikosuru](#): > > Black eyes as in…recently abused? No - black eyes as in Krull - [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiRqZGwcljg](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiRqZGwcljg) ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/7 "2012-02-14T13:41:34Z")
[Black eyes](http://daydreamerwrites.blogspot.com/2009/09/you-ew-my-brown-eyed-girl.html) ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/8 "2012-02-14T13:44:30Z")
Sometimes that girl she looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a girl… she’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. When she comes at ya, doesn’t seem to be living… until she bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then… ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin’. ---
**Author:** ![FasterThanMeerkats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/278dde/32.png) [@FasterThanMeerkats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FasterThanMeerkats)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/9 "2012-02-14T13:51:20Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > Sometimes that girl she looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a girl… she’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. When she comes at ya, doesn’t seem to be living… until she bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then… ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin’. You’re going to need a bigger bouquet.😛 ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/10 "2012-02-14T16:25:38Z")
> [@Ura-Maru](#): > > I don’t actually know her name, or have any way to contact her. She ran off for the bus before I got to that bit. Obviously an oversight on my part. I’m assuming she interpreted the lack of sally-forth as disinterest, which is not unreasonable. > > Besides, I’m too lazy to be a stalker OR an 80’s movie romantic guy. Well that sucks. Perhaps, if you’re ever in the same area, you’ll cross paths with her again and you’ll get another shot. Do not deliberately go to the area and wait every day in hopes of seeing her - that would be stalker-like 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/11 "2012-02-14T17:08:00Z")
> [@mnemosyne](#): > > Well that sucks. Perhaps, if you’re ever in the same area, you’ll cross paths with her again and you’ll get another shot. > > Do not deliberately go to the area and wait every day in hopes of seeing her - that would be stalker-like 🙂 But if you go every \_\_\_\_\__(day that you met her)_ around the time that you met her, that would be OK. What?! ---
**Author:** ![Rocketeer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocketeer/32/4437_2.png) [@Rocketeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rocketeer)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/12 "2012-02-14T17:09:04Z")
> [@FasterThanMeerkats](#): > > You’re going to need a bigger bouquet.😛 :D:D:D ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/13 "2012-02-14T18:19:11Z")
I’ve never really been in the dating game, but isn’t Valentine’s Day kind of a lot of pressure for a first date with someone you’ve just met? ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/14 "2012-02-14T18:38:18Z")
Did she run for the bus when you said, “What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?” ---
**Author:** ![Merneith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Merneith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merneith)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/15 "2012-02-14T20:32:41Z")
Be there at the bus stop with a bunch of flowers. I don’t think it’s stalker-y to just wait for her. Grilling the other bus stop people for info about her would be creepy. But just waiting for her, one time, is fine. If she’s not there today, try again next Monday. ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/16 "2012-02-14T20:58:04Z")
Please don’t. Guy waiting day after day with flowers on the chance he sees someone he spoke to once for 15 minutes = creepy. If the reason you ran into her in the first place is that you left work 10 minutes later than usual because you had to finish something up, then by all means leave work 10 minutes later and glance around for her on the odd chance that happens to be her usual time to cross by the area. Likewise if it’s not your usual bus route because it’s 5 minutes longer…go ahead, use the bus route again. But don’t wait for her. Don’t ask around for her. Don’t spend time just sitting there staring at the crowd in case she walks by. As usual, it’s a matter of degree - you can try and cross paths with her again, but don’t go there and _wait_ every damn day. That’s just too intense for a 15 minute conversation with someone whose name you don’t even know. Keep in mind that _she doesn’t know you either_. Leave the rom-com movie stuff out of it. Rom-com movies are movies… they are about as realistic in most cases as science movies (that is, not at all). ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/17 "2012-02-14T22:34:05Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > Sometimes that girl she looks right into ya. Right into your eyes. And, you know, the thing about a girl… she’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. When she comes at ya, doesn’t seem to be living… until she bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then… ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin’. Clap Clap Clap Clap Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap ---
**Author:** ![Merneith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Merneith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merneith)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/18 "2012-02-14T23:15:56Z")
> [@mnemosyne](#): > > Please don’t. Guy waiting day after day with flowers on the chance he sees someone he spoke to once for 15 minutes = creepy. > > If the reason you ran into her in the first place is that you left work 10 minutes later than usual because you had to finish something up, then by all means leave work 10 minutes later and glance around for her on the odd chance that happens to be her usual time to cross by the area. Likewise if it’s not your usual bus route because it’s 5 minutes longer…go ahead, use the bus route again. > > But don’t wait for her. Don’t ask around for her. Don’t spend time just sitting there staring at the crowd in case she walks by. As usual, it’s a matter of degree - you can try and cross paths with her again, but don’t go there and _wait_ every damn day. That’s just too intense for a 15 minute conversation with someone whose name you don’t even know. Keep in mind that _she doesn’t know you either_. > > Leave the rom-com movie stuff out of it. Rom-com movies are movies… they are about as realistic in most cases as science movies (that is, not at all). See - I disagree. I don’t think it’s stalkery to try and find her again. If he finds her and she’s not interested - then it’s stalkery if he persists. And like I said, stalkery if he quizes the bus stop people about her. But just to go and wait one time for her seems perfectly reasonable to me. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/19 "2012-02-14T23:21:03Z")
> [@FasterThanMeerkats](#): > > You’re going to need a bigger bouquet.😛 Well played indeed. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2012, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775/20 "2012-02-14T23:40:19Z")
> [@Merneith](#): > > See - I disagree. I don’t think it’s stalkery to try and find her again. If he finds her and she’s not interested - then it’s stalkery if he persists. And like I said, stalkery if he quizes the bus stop people about her. But just to go and wait one time for her seems perfectly reasonable to me. This. If **Suburban Plankton** hadn’t tried to find me again, bordering on stalking, but not creepy, we wouldn’t be celebrating our 19th wedding anniversary this coming May. You just need to drop it completely if you do find her again and she’s not interested. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-blew-that-right-dating-whiff-probably-boring/612775.md?page=2)