Holy crizzap, your baby is a toddler now?!
About a week shy of 17 months, yeah. Time flies, huh? 
You’re clearly an awesome parent. Or, just as likely, you had easier/different kids. Turns out not all children are like yours. (I feel like this is something parents should remind themselves of on a daily basis to avoid judging other parents.)
My son (who is 18 months) is a motor baby. Walks, runs, climbs like CRAZY. He can’t stop moving, and he loves to explore. And he has NO sense. We’ve been working with him to get him to hold our hands in places like parking lots or high-traffic areas like malls. Sometimes he cooperates and sometimes - shocker, I know - he doesn’t. When he doesn’t want to cooperate, it’s not for the lack of constant attention or attempts at handholding.
I actually don’t use a leash with him. But only because I haven’t considered it til now. Now that I have…I just might get one.
Having now read the full thread, I see many other people said the same as me, but better…
Hey, my son does this too! Since he usually does this when we’re in a parking lot and he wants to go chasing cars, I end up picking him up, which just begets the full-on tantrum. If you figure out any tricks to deal with this, let me know! (Sometimes I can get him to follow me by stomping my feet and sometimes I bribe him with a snack - this works best for picking him up from daycare, since he needs a snack then anyway, so it’s not bribing, right?)
I think leashes are a good idea, both for the safety of the child and for the total strangers, like me, who get startled and knocked off balance when a child runs full - force into their legs. It’s happened to me quite a few times. I always think, what if I fell and hurt them? What if I had spilled my hot coffee on them? The parents might be crazy and try to sue me, or something! Not to even mention how awful I’d feel.
My parents didn’t use a leash with me (I was born in 1981 - I don’t know if anyone did, then). I don’t have kids of my own, but I used to babysit quite a bit, for a few different families. Some kids were always content to hold my hand, and some were born adventurers, always running off to check out whatever caught their eye. I wonder if adults who describe themselves as “tactile learners” were more prone to be the “take off and run” type, compared to people who learn more by reading and watching… In my case, I learned very early on that doing anything I wasn’t specifically told to do, including straying from my parents, would result in physical pain - which is not to say all people with well - mannered children are abusing them, by the way.
Here’s what I see as the big problem, and why there is so much hate for leashes: The people who use them as an excuse to ignore their kid completely. As an extreme example: My mother tied me to my bed at night when I was a toddler. As she did with my older siblings, before me. It was a home - made thing, basically a backwards vest with a zipper up the back, and a long fabric tail that attached to the bed rail. We called it my “harness”. There’s no reasonable explanation for it, other than simply not having to think about me for awhile. I can envision some parents with this same attitude, using a leash as a babysitter while they’re shopping, or talking or whatever, just assuming that because they can feel the leash moving, the kid’s fine and happy, and couldn’t possibly be unsafe or misbehaving. I’ve seen kids tethered to baby carriages, with no parent in sight! Maybe the odds against kidnapping are pretty good, but what if they tip the carriage over on to themselves? Or just get bored, undo the leash, and split?
Yeah this ended up much longer than I expected. Anyway, the actual points I’m trying to make are: a) All kids are different. b) Using a leash does not make someone a bad parent - ignoring your child’s safety and well - being does. c) Leashes make this easier for some of those bad parents, and wind up with a reputation they don’t deserve.
wow, I don’t know what to say about the homemade bed harness, except that is harsh
We simply put a door knob cover lock thingy on the inside of their door to keep them from wandering at night, but as soon as potty training started we stopped that because I thought it would be akin to torture to not have them in diapers and also not able to open the door to use the potty. Plus, they more than one time got their little fingers into the gap in the door knob cover and locked themselves in. My husband was able to use a screw driver to get the door unlocked from the outside, but when he wasn’t home I did have to resort to taking the whole knob off to get in the room to unlock it (and this was the time a friend of mine came over with her little ones and all four of them, her two and my two, were locked in the room and couldn’t get it opened because of the door knob cover). Yep, kids are so much fun I tell ya.
I guess I have little opposition to leashes in themselves, as opposed to the use of leashes to allow neglectful or overly indulgent parenting.
It may well be confirmation bias or just an unwarranted prejudice that causes me to perceive a correlation between parents ignoring their kids while in public. Or not using the situation as an opportunity to teach the kid what I consider to be “proper” public behavior and respect for others. Some of the comments above corroborate my suspicion - right or wrong - that leashes reflect the parenting belief that developing children must be allowed/encouraged great freedom to explore and express themselves - no matter the time or place. Some places are more appropriate than others for indulging your precious spawn’s self esteem.
I guess my personal thought is that holding a hand allows more direct contact and control - better oportunity for perceiving and influencing behavior. Haven’t seen too many kid-leashes with choke collars! 
I’m sure I’m phrasing this in a way that will cause various folk to take offense, and don’t care to take the time to parse it to express it better. As stated above, I truly believe each parent should be granted great latitude to fuck their kids up however they wish. I really don’t give a fuck how anyone raises their kids, so long as they end up being productive members of society, and don’t interfere with my peace and enjoyment of my property. The main limitations I would impose would be avoiding certain levels of physical or mental “abuse” - and a leash certainly does not constitute abuse IMO. But I will exercise my judgment, however, when a parent’s parenting choice decreases my personal enjoyment of a public space.
Hell, I’ve expressed similar judgments in the “screeching” thread. Parents claim there is “nothing they can do.” Or kids are “just being kids.” Fine. You can do what you want and what the law allows. But I will express my opinion and disapprobation (here, if not IRL) that allowing your kids to screech negatively impacts my enjoyment of my home and yard.
I’m with you on the screeching. But in my experience, parents using leashes (or strollers, or hand-holding) are increasing my enjoyment of the public space, by making sure their kids aren’t racing around everywhere banging into things. You are perceiving some substantial difference between leashes and hand-holding that I just don’t see.
We took my cousin’s advice and turned the doorknob around so it locks from the outside. Our daughter is still in a crib, though, and will be until she’s three if she’ll tolerate it. I am mightily enjoying my peaceful nights of unbroken sleep right now.
Having a very energetic, strong and curious child, toddler leashes were a godsend for us. Now that she’s bigger, we mostly resort to bellowing at her when she runs off.
I fear I have overstated my dislike for them. As a longtime dogowner, it is likely that some of my dislike is the resemblance to dogleashes. Also, handholding has some implication of affection/intimacy.
Might I suggest the image might be improved if they were compared to safety harnesses for climbers instead of animal control devices? (I’ve never shopped/googled them. Mayhaps that is how they ARE presented.)
Yeah, the most common variety that I see these days are animal-shaped “backpacks” with a leash attached. Example here.
awwwwwwww
OMG This owl packpack one is adorable!
I think they are cute and useful even when they grow out of the leash. They can have their own back pack if you remove the leash part and carry snacks and drinks and toys around for themselves. Mine like to pack theirs for trips.
I’da paid money to see that, and the look on the faces of the sanctimonious.
Heh. Ours came in the mail today and my daughter loves it. She put it on and walked around the apartment in it, happy as a clam. When I tried to take it off of her she freaked out and screamed so I left it on a while longer. She really loves her new giraffe “backpack” and thinks it truly awesome.
Pics or it didn’t happen 
My daughter loves hers too. Walking all the way to the end of our (long) street though? Not so much. I got to carry my two-year-old a half a mile, ugh.
You are being a marvelous and good parent.
Not a parent myself but it sounds like a fantastic tool and you sound like a fantastic parent. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them, or if I have I don’t remember. But I think they sound very useful 