I wave furiously at the person who I feel should have waved at me. I also fret that I am not waving visibly enough when someone helps me out.
I try to return waves whenever I can, and I like to get them in return, but its not critical to me. As someone who is often in a rush, I understand that others can be too, and so I try to live and let live. What really chaps my ass is people who pull shit that slows me down AND doesn’t help themselves at all. Last weekend I was waiting to turn right on red at an intersection. Some jackass in a big SUV pulls up in the lefthand lane, signaling left, and pulls so far past the stop line and into the intersection that I can’t see past him and have to wait for the light to change before I can safely turn. So he ended up costing me time me in a way that didn’t get shit for himself. Thanks, guy!
Last January I was in Saint Martin, driving a rental. It is customary to beep your horn (a very short beep) to thank anyone for anything. At first I thought people were pissed off at my driving. Gradually, I unwound and settled in. Soon I was beeping. Everyone is courteous to everyone else, and there is a constant “beep” symphony going on as you drive through the roundabouts.
I don’t drive, but I walk through doors. I often make it a point to hold doors open for people. Most people give me a thank you, or a smile, or at least look at me.
But I get annoyed with the self-absorbed asswipes who don’t acknowledge my existence at all. It’s as if they’re not surprised that the door just happens to be magically open.
It gets worse when I end up holding the door for a whole stream of people. The first few may give me a thank you, but people after that just take it for granted that there’s a magic door. That’s when I feel like a doorman who has nothing better to do than assist ungrateful jerks. In those circumstances, I just go through the door myself, and the hell with holding it open. I sometimes secretly hope that it slams into the nose of some clueless fuckwit who suddenly realizes “Hey! Door!”
Pisses me off too. My informal survey suggests that 9 times out of 10 it is a woman who doesn’t wave.
[sup]::awaits the smack-down::[/sup]
I decided not to make that comment about the door thing.
I’ve given up getting irritated by this. I flash my lights to let people know they can pull ahead, or over, and it surprises me when I get a flash back. I don’t bother looking for a wave anymore; it happens so rarely.
Next there will be a pitting on those who don’t wave in response to a wave. 
I wave depending on if it’s warranted, in the case where you let me in then you will get a wave, if it’s a case where you are obligated to let me in, like a ‘zipper’ or alternate merging of 2 lanes there is no such obligation, and usually no wave.
The problem would also be resolved if people got into the correct lane at the appropriate time, and no one would have to be a sucker or a tight ass about anything. There was an exit on my commute that was always super backed up during construction – like 10 or 15 minutes worth of backed up. And there were always assholes who would just drive past the line and expect to be let in near the front. Hell no. I am not making the line even longer for the people who are actually waiting in it just so you can exit quickly.
There are people who legitimately didn’t realize they needed to get over right away and would be trying frantically to merge somewhere in the middle of the line. Them, I let in.
But the ones who cruised past the whole line at high speed with their blinker on as if to say ‘No, really, I’m trying to get, honest, I swear’ while they bypassed the line? They can just go to the next frigging exit and double back.
I’m so nice, I sometimes wave twice.
(Well, I did this morning. Some very nice lady actually stopped in the midst of annoying construction to allow me to turn into my son’s daycare, and I waved once right before I turned, and again as I went past her - I didn’t think she saw me the first time.)
Everyone around here (just south of Cleveland) is a passive-aggressive driver - meaning, they will drift over in front of you without a care in the world, because obviously they are the only ones who exist (my husband, my MIL, AND my FIL all drive like this, so I really don’t think I’m imagining things). My husband makes fun of me because I grew up learning to drive incredibly defensively - I feel much more at home driving in Washington DC or Northern Virginia than I do here. And I drive here like everyone else is going to hit me. If I don’t drive that way, I’m pretty sure I’ll get hit one of these days.
Yeah, well they don’t. They start blocking the thru lane waiting for someone to let them in thus creating more traffic. Not allowing them in is just causing more of a mess. Eventually someone will and now we’ve got thousands of other people inconvenienced to prove a point that the offender doesn’t give a shit about anyway. They know what they are doing.
I always fantasize about having a paintball gun on hand for those folks.
I also empathize with tdn and his tangent about doors. I’m annoyed by one fuckwit taking advantage of me, and saddened when there is a whole herd of them who seem to think I’m practicing for a job at Wal Mart.
A friend had the brilliant idea of everyone being issued a gun to shoot bad drivers with. It wouldn’t kill, or even harm, but it would turn the driver’s face black and singe his hair, much like a shooting victim in a cartoon. It would last about 5 minutes, during which time other drivers could identify who the idiot was. Fire it too many times, though, and it would backfire.
You’re a shrink. Put a hex on them. 
Perhaps they are using thier hands to, you know, drive. Not everyone has an automatic transmission, and moving into a slower or faster lane likely requires a different gear to be selected.
When I’m driving my sidecar outfit, I often fail to acknowlege “biker waves” because sidecar rigs often demand both hands to supply the high steering forces which occur with acceleration and deceleration as well as when turning.
But, yeah, maybe they’re just jerks.
Using only a couple fingers to wave is acceptable to me or a nod, anything really. I truly hate it when people refuse to acknowledge you doing them a favor.
::flips off Elendil’s Heir::
::drives out of thread, talking on cell phone and weaving::
That’s magical. Do you morph through them like that guy on Heroes? Is there a sound like that eerie one light sabers make when they turn on?
I just figure it makes sense to acknowledge when someone does something polite or courteous, when they could have been a jerk. I do wave, but sometimes I wonder if they see it. Seems to me it’s just better to keep things in the world on a better level, if possible, and that little effort might make somebody think it’s worth doing again.
That said, I’m going to contradict myself somewhat. I think there should be some sort of signal to identify drivers who run up the shoulder or closed lane until they get to the front and then force their way into the merging line. They should have to wait there until they’re one car back from where they left the line. I don’t let them in if I can help it, unless keeping them out backs up other traffic that didn’t cause the problem. And for crying out loud, don’t give me a dang courtesy wave when you’ve practically torn off my headlight forcing your way in front of me, after you’ve driven up the shoulder to get to the front of the line. I was trying to keep you where you belong, darn it!
I was going to come and here and post that I’m one who would like a wave when I let people in, but over the years have learned to console myself with the thought that it might be better, whether true or not, that the person concentrate on their way ahead.
Thanks, SP2263, for confirming that this was a reasonable hope and the consolation sought was valid, at least in one instance.
Seconded. I almost always wave to thank someone for letting me cut in.
But the other day I was in wall-to-wall traffic, trying to turn left at a stoplight. The guy in the oncoming car stopped so I could squeeze through, and as I turned a bunch of kids darted across the street. I really WANTED to wave, I felt bad for NOT waving, but one hand off the wheel and I could’ve smeared the pedestrians.
And this is sort of the opposite point, but I’m fucking sick of people EXPECTING you to cut in front of them. Sometimes I just want to wait my fucking turn, and people are stopping their cars, holding up traffic and giving me hand motions, like, ‘‘Please! We must inconvenience everyone so I can be a nice person!’’
But I never understood the whole, ‘‘I have to be appreciated for this good deed,’’ mind-set. Virtue is its own reward, blah blah blah.