# I just saw a Bigfoot in the woods; to whom should I report it? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 11, 2006, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086 "2006-07-11T21:33:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/41 "2006-07-12T00:14:48Z")
Not quite the stuff of sequential thread titles, but I found it highly amusing that this was the top non-sticky thread in MPSIMS, and the second thread’s OP was **Yeticus Rex**. Put **that** in your conspiracy theory stockpile! ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/42 "2006-07-12T00:15:57Z")
\*\*Winston Smith \*\*–if y’all was a _Real, Og-Fearin Ammurican_, you’d have shot it with the Elephant Gun y’all carry to keep crows outen the garden. So…how long you been _posin’_ as a Real Ammurican…Comrade? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/43 "2006-07-12T00:35:09Z")
[QUOTE=Polycarp] Not quite the stuff of sequential thread titles, but I found it highly amusing that this was the top non-sticky thread in MPSIMS, and the second thread’s OP was **Yeticus Rex**. Put **that** in your conspiracy theory stockpile! [/QUOTE] I fail to see what poker has to do with my most recent bigfoot sighting, the CIA movement against me and the _satellite thing_, but that’s fine. I feel ya. Thanks (I think). ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/44 "2006-07-12T00:41:59Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor] \*\*Winston Smith \*\*–if y’all was a _Real, Og-Fearin Ammurican_, you’d have shot it with the Elephant Gun y’all carry to keep crows outen the garden. So…how long you been _posin’_ as a Real Ammurican…Comrade? :dubious: [/QUOTE] Hey, I squeezed on off at the sumbitch with my trusty .38 (it’s my custom to do so first and ask questions _later_ but I’d had a couple “road sodas” and, well, my eyesight ain’t what it used to be (it’s the first thing to go, you know). That’s never happened to me before. Really. I must have been tired or something. ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/45 "2006-07-12T00:42:48Z")
Sorry, but what (who?) you saw couldn’t possibly be Sasquatch (codename Bigfoot). You’re far out of its range which is _Northwestern_ US and Canada. Besides, the two bodies found in one of the state parks here were, obviously, the work of said primate. He couldn’t possibly be in two places at once. More than one, you say? No way. Why? Because I SAID! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/46 "2006-07-12T00:54:17Z")
Folks, **Listen To Winston.** Ya’ll know how badly that “swallow the expanding manta ray” thing turned out. ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/47 "2006-07-12T00:54:55Z")
[QUOTE=Winston Smith] Hey, I squeezed on off at the sumbitch with my trusty .38 (it’s my custom to do so first and ask questions _later_ but I’d had a couple “road sodas” and, well, my eyesight ain’t what it used to be (it’s the first thing to go, you know). That’s never happened to me before. Really. I must have been tired or something. [/QUOTE] Oh, sure! I’m sure that’s what you and your buddies at Comintern would like us to believe, isn’t it? Well keep your wookie-loving communism out of _my_ country!! ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/48 "2006-07-12T01:01:30Z")
[QUOTE=picunurse] Sorry, but what (who?) you saw couldn’t possibly be Sasquatch (codename Bigfoot). You’re far out of its range which is _Northwestern_ US and Canada. Besides, the two bodies found in one of the state parks here were, obviously, the work of said primate. He couldn’t possibly be in two places at once. More than one, you say? No way. Why? Because I SAID! [/QUOTE] I saw a bigfoot, not Bill Gates. Jeez. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/49 "2006-07-12T01:06:17Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant] Folks, **Listen To Winston.** Ya’ll know how badly that “swallow the expanding manta ray” thing turned out. [/QUOTE] What he said. Seriously. It’s not even a “trust me” kind of thing. It’s more a “believe me now, thank me later” kind of thing. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/50 "2006-07-12T01:13:48Z")
[QUOTE=Linty Fresh] Oh, sure! I’m sure that’s what you and your buddies at Comintern would like us to believe, isn’t it? Well keep your wookie-loving communism out of _my_ country!! [/QUOTE] If **50’s Dad** were here right now, he’d tell you to settle down, son, and use your manners when addressing your elders. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 8:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/51 "2006-07-12T08:46:20Z")
Let’s see, big hairy, scary monster and you’re _wondering_ who to call? Oh, come on, now, the choice is _obvious_, you call someone who can take care of that big scary, hairy monster! Not the military, of course, since they’re in on any CIA operations. No, you call the one group out there who not only has the necessary hardware to handle the big, scary, hairy, monster, but _also_ would like nothing better than plugging any pesky CIA agents who might show up: The NRA! 😃 Just tell 'em it’s either Osama or a UN gungrabber on the loose, and you’ll have a couple million guys loaded up with enough weapons and booze to invade several Third World nations in no time. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/52 "2006-07-12T12:46:42Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] Let’s see, big hairy, scary monster … The NRA! 😃 [/QUOTE] I’m thinking Charlton Heston here… ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/53 "2006-07-12T13:28:20Z")
Well, here’s the [pic](http://i82.photobucket.com/albums/j257/winston_smith_/bigfoot.jpg) I promised. It’s a bit of a disappointment (it’s _kind of_ hard to make him out), but I’ve posted it nonetheless, as promised. He is (or was) in the lower left-hand corner. You can _sort of_ make him out. If you squint. And use your _imagination_. You can see him much more clearly in [this pic](http://i82.photobucket.com/albums/j257/winston_smith_/lentobigfoot.jpg), though I must confess I did not take that picture myself. Call it _Stock Footage_, if you please. ---
**Author:** ![badbadrubberpiggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@badbadrubberpiggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badbadrubberpiggy)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/54 "2006-07-12T13:37:03Z")
Well, I don’t see any Bigfoot… But did anyone notice the crying Virgin Mary in the upper right hand corner? ---
**Author:** ![jali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecae2f/32.png) [@jali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jali)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/55 "2006-07-12T13:49:39Z")
Thanks Winston for the “bigfoot” remarks. My guy recently told me… …lemme set it up first: We were lounging on the couch and my feet were in my sweetie’s lap. He started laughing and said, “you have grown man sized feet,” and swung his feet up to measure them against mine. (grrr) _Think_ people, before you post. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/56 "2006-07-12T13:50:46Z")
[QUOTE=badbadrubberpiggy] Well, I don’t see any Bigfoot… [/QUOTE] Look _closer_. [HERE HE IS!](http://www.nba.com/media/sonics/Squatch%20dunking.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/57 "2006-07-12T13:57:42Z")
I’m sad because I really wanted to see a honest to God bigfoot. You’re a sasquatch tease, **Winston**. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/58 "2006-07-12T14:00:21Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor] Look _closer_. [HERE HE IS!](http://www.nba.com/media/sonics/Squatch%20dunking.jpg) [/QUOTE] What about the shoes? I didn’t see the shoes. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/59 "2006-07-12T14:08:39Z")
[QUOTE=you with the face] I’m sad because I really wanted to see a honest to God bigfoot. You’re a sasquatch tease, **Winston**. ☹ [/QUOTE] No one is as disappointed as me, **you**. When I make a promise, I keep it. That’s just _who I am_. ---
**Author:** ![Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silence_of_the_clams)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086/60 "2006-07-12T15:56:57Z")
[QUOTE=silenus] [Sea Dog Brewing Company.](http://www.seadogbrewing.com/) You’re welcome! [/QUOTE] Do they in any way have anything to do with Sea Monkeys? Imagine that, a cold brew with Sea Monkeys in it, mmmmh… maybe that’s why the bigfoot frequents the area. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-saw-a-bigfoot-in-the-woods-to-whom-should-i-report-it/364086.md?page=4)