# I just talked to my ex-girlfriend...
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [April 27, 2002, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929 "2002-04-27T06:43:26Z")
**Posts on this page:** 11
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/1 "2002-04-27T06:43:26Z")
… the only girl I’ve ever truly fallen in love with, one I’d give anything for. We’d gone out for a year, then she broke up with me but stayed friends for a couple more years, during which time she explicitely and repeatedly said she’d never go out with me again. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore (especially after she got in a serious relationship with someone else) and we severed all contact. That was 3 years ago. A couple of months ago we started exchanging e-mail again. Well, I talked to her on the phone today and found out that not only has she been unattached for over a year, but that she’s had over a dozen dates through on-line personals in the past year. Even got quoted to that effect in a recent newspaper article about on-line dating, she says. So what would you do?
I know you guys are probably sick of stories like this, it’s nothing special, but it helps me to get it out of my system. Thanks for listening.
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### Author:  [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/2 "2002-04-27T06:59:06Z")
Ask her what sites she’s using and post your own ad.
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### Author:  [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/3 "2002-04-27T07:10:45Z")
Sounds like she is not ready for **true** love. Go on with your life. If it is to be it will and if it ain’t, you can’t make it be.
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### Author:  [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 10:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/4 "2002-04-27T10:18:54Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Snooooopy \*
> \*\*Ask her what sites she’s using and post your own ad. \*\*
I’ve already found her ad, but what good would that do?
Maybe **GusNSpot** is right. She has no trouble getting dates, but “hasn’t found the right one yet.” One of the guys she met on-line flew across the country to meet her and later proposed to her, which she turned down.
I almost wish she’d just get marrid, that’ll force me to really go on with my life… (Though the cynical voice in me is saying “what life? you haven’t got one!”)
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### Author:  [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/5 "2002-04-27T12:32:34Z")
Okay, you’re available, she knows it, yet she is still searching for other men via the web.
scr4, the writing is on the wall. If you can’t handle the fact that you’re not the one for her then you should re-sever all contact with her. Wish her luck in finding Mr. Right and then mooooove on.
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### Author:  [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/6 "2002-04-27T14:14:11Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by scr4 \*
> \*\*
>
> I’ve already found her ad, but what good would that do?
> \*\*
I’m not talking about finding her ad. I’m talking about you scoring yourself a few dates with other women.
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### Author:  [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/7 "2002-04-27T15:54:29Z")
What is the question?
Is it about Internet dating which has several hundred messages on the board already?
If you want to date her, ask her out.
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### Author:  [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/8 "2002-04-27T16:38:11Z")
There is no question, I thought this was MPSIMS? Sorry if I wasted your bandwidth, I’ll stop from now on.
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### Author:  [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/9 "2002-04-27T16:44:26Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by scr4 \*
> \*\*… So what would you do?
>
> \*\*
This looks like a question.
Unless you think the recent email is an attempt to come back, I would cut her out of my life **completely**.
Find out if she’s interested. Be blunt about it. Don’t mess around with hidden messages and “reading between the lines”.
The quicker and cleaner the issue gets resolved, the better.
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### Author:  [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/10 "2002-04-27T16:55:21Z")
Thanks **Bearflag70** et al., I can’t deny that that’s the best thing to do. It’d be easier if she didn’t mean so much as a friend - even after we broke up we were best friends for a couple of years. Still, not everything in life has a happy ending…
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### Author:  [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)
#### Post date: [April 27, 2002, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-just-talked-to-my-ex-girlfriend/105929/11 "2002-04-27T17:19:10Z")
Hey! I’ve got an idea! Quit your job, leave Tokyo and come to Toronto to work for a small high tech company here.
Nah. That’d never happen. 😉
Seriously, though, I think your comment about wishing she’d get married and becoming unavailable to you is most telling. Is there anything significantly different about the situation now that leads you to believe things will be better if you start seeing her again?
Good luck!