# I knew it!! It wasn't a massive seismic event; it was gay people. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2005, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233 "2005-01-05T18:06:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2005, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/61 "2005-01-06T21:02:05Z")
> [@Shade](#): > > I once made a JOKE that gay sex could cause earthquakes. Is there nothing ridiculous enough that someone won’t say it for real one day? You were beaten to the punch by about 1500 years: > [@](#): > > At least when the Emperor Justinian, a Christian monotheist, decided to outlaw sodomy, he had to come up with a good practical reason, which he did. It is well known, Justinian declared, that buggery is a principal cause of earthquakes, and so must be prohibited. > > - Gore Vidal, _Monotheism and its Discontents_ ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2005, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/62 "2005-01-06T21:10:17Z")
> [@Coil](#): > > Well at least the gay people in Sweden (and all the rest of us Swedes as well I guess) got the blame this time. Look at the link posted by **Baker**. Maybe you can claim some Scandinavian credit for that? > > [http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...en\_1-3-2005.pdf](http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...en_1-3-2005.pdf) > [http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...es\_1-2-2005.pdf](http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...es_1-2-2005.pdf) > > Does anyone know if those people and that site are real? I mean are there people that evil and stupid? Sorry to say, Coil, they are very real. I see them around at least a couple of times a week, because they live in my hometown, Topeka, Kansas. Humpf. At least I was born here. Fred comes from Missisipi, moving here in the 50’s. His older kids are the same age as me, late forties, early fifties. The guy has great-grandchildren to carry on his work. The Westboro Baptist Church pickets my own church, Grace Episcopal Cathedral, a couple times a month, at least. They were there on Christmas Eve, hollering from across the street that Christmas is a pagan holiday. Huh??? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2005, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/63 "2005-01-06T21:15:17Z")
> [@Coil](#): > > Well at least the gay people in Sweden (and all the rest of us Swedes as well I guess) got the blame this time. Look at the link posted by **Baker**. Maybe you can claim some Scandinavian credit for that? > > [http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...en\_1-3-2005.pdf](http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...en_1-3-2005.pdf) > [http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...es\_1-2-2005.pdf](http://www.godhatesfags.com/fliers/...es_1-2-2005.pdf) > > Does anyone know if those people and that site are real? I mean are there people that evil and stupid? Do a search on “Fred Phelps” here on the SDMB, and you’ll find out way more than you ever wanted to about these diseased hate-mongers. They get pitted on pretty much a bi-weekly basis. ---
**Author:** ![quiltguy154](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ad7895/32.png) [@quiltguy154](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quiltguy154)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2005, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/64 "2005-01-06T21:19:15Z")
[QUOTE=They have a saying that goes something like, “A wife for children, a man for desire, but for pleasure a boy.”?[/QUOTE] Or, as I recall: “A woman for duty, a boy for pleasure, a melon, for ecstasy.” ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2005, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/65 "2005-01-06T21:29:33Z")
So that’s why noone has said I made the earth move for them, I’m just doing the dirty with the wrong gender. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2005, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/66 "2005-01-06T21:47:26Z")
> [@Rune](#): > > Yeah, come here and strut your stuff! Brag like a motherfucker! > > Always it’s the stupid yanks, that gets to get all the blame, the goddamn Jews, the bossy feminists, the moonbat liberals or the fucking fags. bah… I tell you, nobody ever blames us fucking Danes of anything. Blotty unfair! It’s like they don’t know we exists or something. You do know we exist don’t you? I do exists don’t I? Well, don’t forget that if it weren’t for you guys, then Shakespeare would never have written _Hamlet_, and thus Freshman would have to find something else to get pissed at in English class. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/67 "2005-01-07T03:31:05Z")
> [@](#): > > “A woman for duty, a boy for pleasure, a melon, for ecstasy.” …and each night the traumatized cantalopes would gather to vow their vengeance and work on their secret earthquake generator… ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/68 "2005-01-07T03:33:51Z")
I think the Montreal gay Doper community should be held to account for the St. Lawrence Valley fault system! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/69 "2005-01-07T03:38:33Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > …and each night the traumatized cantalopes would gather to vow their vengeance and work on their secret earthquake generator… [You think they’ve been reading this, then?](http://www.excludedmiddle.com/earthquake.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/70 "2005-01-07T09:16:40Z")
> [@Rune](#): > > Always it’s the stupid yanks, that gets to get all the blame, the goddamn Jews, the bossy feminists, the moonbat liberals or the fucking fags. bah… I tell you, nobody ever blames us fucking Danes of anything. Blotty unfair! It’s like they don’t know we exists or something. You do know we exist don’t you? I do exists don’t I? My Communist brother is going to spend the next few months in Denmark. I think you may just get what you’re asking for. ---
**Author:** ![Testy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@Testy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Testy)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/71 "2005-01-07T09:38:00Z")
> [@Bear\_Nenno](#): > > Holy Crap!! What is wrong with these people. I thought blaming God for the weather and earthquakes and fires was long in our past! > Are these people going to start sacrificing some goats or some shit to make god happy again??? Well yes, actually. If you go out to Mecca/Medina in a couple of weeks there will be dead goats all over the place. I see truck loadsof them heading west almost constantly. Testy ---
**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/72 "2005-01-07T10:27:01Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > How does one fornicate usuriously, anyway? I’m guessing it’s because gay guys aren’t really qualified to fornicate u_xo_riously, except in Chick tracts, so they have to go with the next-best thing. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/73 "2005-01-07T10:29:35Z")
Well, apparently they haden’t been fornicating _enough_ to wipe out all the religious fanatics. Therefore, I request—no, _demand_ that the gays of my country “get it on” in overdrive until cataclysmic natural disasters cleanse the world of hardline religious fundamentalism. Western civilization depends on it, damnit! Time is of the essense! ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 10:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/74 "2005-01-07T10:44:14Z")
“Homoclismic” I nominate for that for Word of the Month! ---
**Author:** ![Rune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e68b1a/32.png) [@Rune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rune)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/75 "2005-01-07T10:51:11Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > Well, apparently they haden’t been fornicating _enough_ to wipe out all the religious fanatics. Hey! Can straights apply?! “Fuck for Death”. That sounds just like my kind of thing. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/76 "2005-01-07T12:35:42Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > Well, apparently they haden’t been fornicating _enough_ to wipe out all the religious fanatics. > > Therefore, I request—no, _demand_ that the gays of my country “get it on” in overdrive until cataclysmic natural disasters cleanse the world of hardline religious fundamentalism. Western civilization depends on it, damnit! Time is of the essense! Is killing all you can think of? They could use their powers for good! Perhaps, they could even homoclismically warp the fabric of the universe itself and prevent the tragedy. If they could turn back time . . . If they could find a way . . . ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/77 "2005-01-07T13:13:06Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Is killing all you can think of? They could use their powers for good! Perhaps, they could even homoclismically warp the fabric of the universe itself and prevent the tragedy. > > If they could turn back time . . . > If they could find a way . . . It was kind of you to share that with us! ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/78 "2005-01-07T13:46:12Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > > [@Rune](#): > > > > I do exists don’t I? > > My Communist brother is going to spend the next few months in Denmark. I think you may just get what you’re asking for. I can see **Rune** now, running through the streets of Copenhagen, yelling “The commies are coming, the commies are coming!!!” Of course, people are going to look at him really wierd and wonder why the hell this guy is running through the streets yelling in english. :dubious: 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/79 "2005-01-07T18:10:16Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > Therefore, I request—no, _demand_ that the gays of my country “get it on” in overdrive until cataclysmic natural disasters cleanse the world of hardline religious fundamentalism. Western civilization depends on it, damnit! Time is of the essense! I’m givin’ it all he’s got, cap’n! He can’t take much more of this before he breaks apart! ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2005, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-knew-it-it-wasnt-a-massive-seismic-event-it-was-gay-people/283233/80 "2005-01-07T18:16:39Z")
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