# I know that moose get big, but yikes! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 17, 2009, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651 "2009-12-17T16:56:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Rain\_Soaked](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19adc/32.png) [@Rain\_Soaked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rain_Soaked)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/81 "2009-12-19T00:49:04Z")
> [@Zebra](#): > > A moose once bit my sister. Was this a Swedish moose? I hear Sweden is very beautiful this time of year. ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/82 "2009-12-19T01:27:24Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > Well, no, neither of my photos was Photoshopped, I can assure you. But, I do admit that I’ve engaged in a little deception in my posed shots. In the first shot, our moose was posed alongside a Giant Tit Mouse: an exceptionally large rodent who often reaches a shoulder-to-ground height in excess of 3 meters. In the second shot, our moose is posed alongside Timmy Abdule Jabbar, Kareem’s younger midget brother: 32 inches and known for his unique high contrast, hyper-saturated appearance and his knack of casting no shadows. Yeah… right! I stand by my statement. The photo with the Giant Tit Mouse is clearly genuine, as the species \*hugeous mousus mammarius \*are known to occupy the same habitat as moose, and in are in fact, their only natural predator. Your photo does appear to show an unfortunate moose about to become a minced-moose-meat-mouse-meal. But there is _ **no way** _ I’m buying your bullshit about “Timmy Jabbar”. Everyone knows Timmy hates Kareem and everything related to the Lakers. Your lame-ass photo is obviously fake because Timmy would never be caught dead wearing a Lakers uniform. As he writes in his popular children’s autobiography (which some critics are convinced was actually ghost-written by Dr. Seuss): \*I do not like Kareem Jabbar Don’t like him near, don’t like him far That goofy freak is just too tall And too damn good at playing ball I hate the Lakers, whether win or lose I find Jerry Buss to be an oozing cooze I’m so sick of the purple and gold Wouldn’t wear their uni, even naked and cold Would not wear it to the prom Would not wear it to please my mom Not even for warm-ups, while getting loose Not even while dunking on a moose \* You, Sir, have been pwned!! ---
**Author:** ![ZenBeam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3ab097/32.png) [@ZenBeam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZenBeam)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/83 "2009-12-19T02:42:03Z")
> [@Hanna](#): > > Here I go again…I think what is really bothering me about that moose’s legs is that in the first photo the lower front legs are a soft dark grey, and in the second they are definitely black. If the photo was taken from the same location, at the same time of day, wouldn’t the leg colors be the same? The second photo looks like the legs have been re-colored to a darker shade. The first photo looks genuine to me, but the second looks weird - and it isn’t the size of the moose, that I totally believe. Overall, the two pictures are exposed differently. The first picture as a whole is a little washed out looking. The moose and the background differ consistently from the first picture to the second. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/84 "2009-12-19T02:53:22Z")
[Moose Pron](http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/moosemount.asp) Possibly NSFW, but it’s funny. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/85 "2009-12-19T08:13:35Z")
No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: “The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist”, “Fillings of Passion”, “The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink”. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/86 "2009-12-19T11:41:10Z")
> [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](#): > > Yeah… right! I stand by my statement. > > \ > > But there is _ **no way** _ I’m buying your bullshit about “Timmy Jabbar”. Everyone knows Timmy hates Kareem and everything related to the Lakers. Your lame-ass photo is obviously fake because Timmy would never be caught dead wearing a Lakers uniform. \ > You, Sir, have been pwned!! Your hyper-acute power of deductive reasoning has indeed thwarted my attempt to introduce a modicum of deception into this otherwise sober and scholarly thread. Alas, I could not entice little Timmy Jabbar to wear a Lakers uniform for the photo shoot, so shamefully, I used a professional celebrity look-alike. To make amends, I offer, royalty free for general public consumption, one of my most prized photographs—one which unambiguously highlights the true size of a particularly large specimen of moose. I snapped this shot just as Giant Chuck Norris, on a dingy dispatched by Cunard Cruise Line, attempted to dislodge a moose from the bow of the QE-2, after she unsuccessfully attempted to cruise beneath the hapless mammal and became entangled with it’s particularly low hanging genitalia. No trickery or enhancement was used on this photo—trust me: [Chuck, QE-2 and the Moose](http://bodybotanicaspa.com/IMAGES/chuck_moose.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/87 "2009-12-19T11:51:24Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > No trickery or enhancement was used on this photo—trust me: > > [Chuck, QE-2 and the Moose](http://bodybotanicaspa.com/IMAGES/chuck_moose.jpg) Love it. All that’s missing is a cute kitty cat and a sniper rifle. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2009, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651/88 "2009-12-19T21:29:45Z")
Of course, he wasn’t a patch on this elusive fellow I happened upon during one of my scheduled walks: [Moose may be larger than you think](http://bodybotanicaspa.com/IMAGES/Large_Moose.jpg) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-know-that-moose-get-big-but-yikes/521651.md?page=4)