# I look like a damn pirate. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 15, 2000, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984 "2000-10-15T08:52:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/1 "2000-10-15T08:52:16Z")
I got a cut over my left eye today. I’m wearing an eyepatch to keep the cut off of the atmosphere. I look like a friggin’ pirate. Fer real! It’s black. And it wraps around my forehead. And I have hair down past my shoulders–and an unshaven stubble on my face. I feel like I should be plundering or pillaging or something. Raiding villages and making off with the women. (Or the weaker, more feminine men they’ve been using as women.) Has anyone else out there ever taken a good look in the mirror–and realized you looked like a pirate? Or some other negative dreg of society? ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/2 "2000-10-15T09:16:05Z")
Arrrrr, me hearties! I wore a patch briefly a few months ago when I was having eye problems. Quickly, I decided to simply close the affected eye instead. ---
**Author:** ![Commander\_Fortune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Commander\_Fortune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Commander_Fortune)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 10:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/3 "2000-10-15T10:28:17Z")
makes your Hallowe’en costume much easire though… ---
**Author:** ![stuyguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@stuyguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stuyguy)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/4 "2000-10-15T13:34:17Z")
Just buy yourself a Hathaway shirt and you’ll be mistaken for a hunky advertising icon, not a plunderer and pillager. Or are you too young to have any idea what the hell I’m talking about? ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/5 "2000-10-15T13:43:26Z")
[Seinfeld impression on] But I don’t wanna be a pirate! [/Seinfeld impression off] ---
**Author:** ![Archer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@Archer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Archer)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/6 "2000-10-15T14:11:05Z")
Mr. Pirate, where are your buccaneers? On the sides of me buckin head! ---
**Author:** ![filthy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@filthy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filthy)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/7 "2000-10-15T15:00:36Z")
Archer Mr. Pirate, where are your buccaneers? ## On the sides of me buckin head! (hehehe)😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lux\_Fiat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bc79bd/32.png) [@Lux\_Fiat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lux_Fiat)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/8 "2000-10-15T17:34:25Z")
Hey, have you heard about the new pirate movie that’s coming out? (wait for it) It’s rated “arrrrrrrrrr!” ::Lux scampers off cackling maniacally:: ---
**Author:** ![magdalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@magdalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magdalene)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/9 "2000-10-15T17:45:25Z")
Have you considered a career in Soap Opera Acting? ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/10 "2000-10-15T19:02:26Z")
> [@](#): > > the cut off of the atmosphere [discovery channel commercial] “AHHHH! The atmosphere!!! AHHHHH!” [/discovery channel commercial] ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/11 "2000-10-15T19:45:05Z")
That’s it, Lux. Walk the plank. For awhile I wore a goatee (well, a VanDyke, for you anal-retentives) and had a shaved head. With fairly angular features and relatively piercing eyes, it made me look even more evil that I usually do. Then I went (still “clean”) with a moustache and a soul patch. Still looked evil. Finally grew my hair out because I got tired of frightening people with my looks. I wanted to wait and do it with my personality. ---
**Author:** ![Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2000, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/12 "2000-10-15T19:56:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by stuyguy \* > \*\*Just buy yourself a Hathaway shirt and you’ll be mistaken for a hunky advertising icon, not a plunderer and pillager. Or are you too young to have any idea what the hell I’m talking about? \*\* I might be too young. 🙂 But more likely–it’s just because I don’t watch TV. I miss out on a lot of advertisements that way. I have the patch off today! It’s a little sensitive to the elements, but I find it to be a pleasant exchange. I stopped watching TV about 2 years ago and haven’t regretted it at all. I still play a lot of video games, though. I’m thinking of keeping the eyepatch for Holloween. (Thanks fer the idea, Cmmdr. Fortune!) ---
**Author:** ![stuyguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@stuyguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stuyguy)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2000, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/13 "2000-10-16T00:01:20Z")
**Ash,** not watching tv in the past 2 years has nothing to do with it. In the 50’s (maybe even earlier – I’m not old enough to know myself) Hathaway Shirts’ version of the “Marlboro Man” in print ads was a studly guy wearing a crisp-pressed dress shirt – admittedly, not the most distinctive of garments. What set him, and Hathaway, apart from the crowd was the unforgettable black eye patch the guy wore. It became the brand’s signature icon. ---
**Author:** ![sk8rixtx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/858c86/32.png) [@sk8rixtx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sk8rixtx)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2000, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/14 "2000-10-16T00:10:18Z")
> [@](#): > > I look like a friggin’ pirate. So? My dad looks like a terrorist. ---
**Author:** ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2000, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/15 "2000-10-16T15:31:06Z")
I was told I looked somewhat frightening in a sense - I have a trench coat type raincoat, and photosensitive glasses. If I went to a day wedding or the like, the glasses go dark, I’m wearing the coat, and I’m told all I need to look like the Secret Service agents is the earpiece…(among other things, they do security for the US president) ---
**Author:** ![Edwardina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Edwardina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edwardina)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2000, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-look-like-a-damn-pirate/36984/16 "2000-10-16T15:53:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by **blessedwolf** \* > \*\*Finally grew my hair out because I got tired of frightening people with my looks. I wanted to wait and do it with my personality. \*\* _gasping with laughter_ That’s such a great line! Omigod!