# I love kittens and puppies **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 1, 2010, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586 "2010-04-01T16:10:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![NOLA\_Cajun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ea666f/32.png) [@NOLA\_Cajun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NOLA_Cajun)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/1 "2010-04-01T16:10:16Z")
And the new forum titles are just peachy. Now I’m going to go have some fried kitten tenders with a cream gravy sauce and some puppy au gratin. I’m still trying to find which puppies are the most tender (what breed and what cut of the meat). I’ve tried pit bulls, corgis & poodles so far. Poodles raised by the rich have been the tastiest but still a little stringy. Any suggestions from the most loving and kindest people on planet earth? On a side note those silly people at [del]Google[/del] Topeka are really causing quite a stir on the internet. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/2 "2010-04-01T16:17:46Z")
You are a sick motherfucker. Don’t you know how fattening that is? ---
**Author:** ![NOLA\_Cajun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ea666f/32.png) [@NOLA\_Cajun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NOLA_Cajun)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/3 "2010-04-01T16:22:49Z")
Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful! And I’m not fat,I’m fluffy! ---
**Author:** ![fuzzypickles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9d8465/32.png) [@fuzzypickles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fuzzypickles)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/4 "2010-04-01T16:24:11Z")
I likes me some panda steak with condor sauce. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/5 "2010-04-01T16:26:04Z")
Spotted owl burgers are pretty tasty too, when you need to eat on the run. ---
**Author:** ![Skammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skammer/32/143_2.png) [@Skammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skammer)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/6 "2010-04-01T16:28:55Z")
Any dog breed will tend to be stringy unless it is specifically raised for food. To get the most tender meat, dogs should be raised in a very small cage that essentially immobilizes them, to prevent excessive muscle buildup. I’ve never been able to get used to the taste (carnivore meat always tends to be… gamey) but if prepared correctly it can be quite a delicacy. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/7 "2010-04-01T16:31:27Z")
I’m going to Baxter’s for lunch. I hear they serve a great fried eagle. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/8 "2010-04-01T16:36:45Z")
Mmmm, fried beagle. With a stack of flatcats. ---
**Author:** ![NOLA\_Cajun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ea666f/32.png) [@NOLA\_Cajun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NOLA_Cajun)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/9 "2010-04-01T16:43:00Z")
> [@Skammer](#): > > …To get the most tender meat, dogs should be raised in a very small cage that essentially immobilizes them, to prevent excessive muscle buildup… Mmmmm, puppy veal steak. Great idea. I really must try that. I hear it’s all the rage in some asian countries. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/10 "2010-04-01T16:46:46Z")
> [@Skammer](#): > > To get the most tender meat, dogs should be raised in a very small cage that essentially immobilizes them, to prevent excessive muscle buildup. Beating them also helps tenderize them. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/11 "2010-04-01T16:54:50Z")
Mmm, hushpuppies. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/12 "2010-04-01T16:58:37Z")
This thread is making me hungry. I wonder if I still have some sliced pig in the fridge? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/13 "2010-04-01T17:11:01Z")
I have long pig. You’re welcome to come over. ---
**Author:** ![CannyDan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cannydan/32/548_2.png) [@CannyDan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CannyDan)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/14 "2010-04-01T17:11:52Z")
I had a friend who owns pugs. I told her the breed was developed by monks specifically for rotisseree grilling. They’re plump and solid and, minus the legs and that pushed-in mug, they are a compact package perfect for open pit roasting. Especially the pampered ones that get table scraps. I used to invite her over for bar-b-que frequently, and always suggested she bring a pug or two. For the crowd. For some reason she doesn’t speak to me any more. Anybody want some cat-kabobs to go with their shish-ka-dog? I’ll pull some prime specimens out of the herd. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/15 "2010-04-01T17:16:14Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > I have long pig. That’s what all the guys say. ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/16 "2010-04-01T17:17:10Z")
You’re a cat-herder? [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/m_MaJDK3VNE/hqdefault.jpg "EDS, an HP Company 'Cat Herders'") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_MaJDK3VNE) ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/17 "2010-04-01T17:20:18Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > I have long pig. You’re welcome to come over. I prefer Indian or Chinese. I’ll have none of that bland Caucasian crap. ---
**Author:** ![NOLA\_Cajun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ea666f/32.png) [@NOLA\_Cajun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NOLA_Cajun)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/18 "2010-04-01T17:22:12Z")
> [@CannyDan](#): > > I had a friend who owns pugs. I told her the breed was developed by monks specifically for rotisseree grilling. They’re plump and solid and, minus the legs and that pushed-in mug, they are a compact package perfect for open pit roasting… I wonder what kind of wine you would serve with that? A Pinot perhaps? ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/19 "2010-04-01T17:29:49Z")
> [@NOLA\_Cajun](#): > > I wonder what kind of wine you would serve with that? A Pinot perhaps? Mad Dog. ---
**Author:** ![CannyDan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cannydan/32/548_2.png) [@CannyDan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CannyDan)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586/20 "2010-04-01T17:33:26Z")
> [@Rico](#): > > You’re a cat-herder? > > [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m\_MaJDK3VNE](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_MaJDK3VNE) Cat WRANGLER, thank you very much. When somebody makes an ad like that the pampered “talent” goes in front of the cameras, primped and preened by a full staff of tradespeople. Those guys are made to look tough, but for them a broken fingernail is a major tragedy. Meantime, behind the scenes, taking the full brunt of assaults upon tender anatomy from that giant herd of thousands of pissy felines, making the filmplace safe for effete directors and actors, are the unsung heroes, the cat wranglers. Proud to be. Don’t let that one scratch you on the ass as you leave. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-kittens-and-puppies/534586.md?page=2)