# "I Love You." "How Much?" **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 4, 2003, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784 "2003-02-04T21:11:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_can_t_believe_that_s_butter)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2003, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/21 "2003-02-04T23:34:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cosmopolitan \* > \*\* > > “A whole shitload, my dear” > > \*\* I finally learned to hold my soda when coming across shit like this. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2003, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/22 "2003-02-04T23:39:51Z")
Am I the only one who thought the answer to “How much?” would be “$20, same as in town.” 😃 OK, I’ll be quiet now. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2003, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/23 "2003-02-04T23:41:44Z")
Baby, if I was a dog, you’d be the something dead and stinky I’d want to roll in! ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2003, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/24 "2003-02-04T23:42:09Z")
How much do I love you? I can only graph it on a mobius loop. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/25 "2003-02-05T00:15:55Z")
I’m getting a cavity over here… ---
**Author:** ![Magickly\_Delicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magickly\_Delicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magickly_Delicious)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/26 "2003-02-05T00:26:50Z")
_sings_ I love you a bushel and a peck, a bushel and a peck, and a hug around the neck, a hug around the neck. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/27 "2003-02-05T00:35:59Z")
“I’ll tell you one thing, it’d be a whole hell of a lot more if you stopped nagging me and made me a friggin sandwich.” What? Not Valentine-y enough? ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/28 "2003-02-05T00:49:10Z")
“With the radiance of a glowing phosphorous tracer round. . .” “With the firey passion of an orbiting AC-130 . . .” “With the detailed precision of a GBU-24. . .” “As much as front line infantry loves close air support. . .” Just gotta put it into the right context for her, man. Trust me. They melt like a hot sabot through a T-72. Tripler And I wonder why I don’t get laid. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![DAVEW0071](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e19b73/32.png) [@DAVEW0071](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DAVEW0071)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/29 "2003-02-05T00:55:10Z")
“I love you more today than yesterday. But not as much as tomorrow.” Nice song. 😃 My wife and I never really did the “How much do you love me” routine. But from time to time, we tell each other “I love you because…” And fill in the blank. It may be something mundane (“because you looked so nice today”), or really important (“because you’re such a good mother to our children”), but it’s always good to hear a reason behind it. Very comforting. ---
**Author:** ![Khadro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f07891/32.png) [@Khadro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadro)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/30 "2003-02-05T00:57:30Z")
“Eh, a bit.” Does the trick most times. ---
**Author:** ![Smashed\_Ice\_Cream](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Smashed\_Ice\_Cream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smashed_Ice_Cream)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/31 "2003-02-05T01:15:32Z")
“You’ll do in a pinch.” I tell my husband I love him a polynomial assload, he says a polynomial assload plus one. I like **Frannie’s** giraffe one best, though. ---
**Author:** ![leechbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@leechbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leechbabe)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/32 "2003-02-05T01:18:19Z")
“I love you as much as a really big fish, maybe a tuna, no a shark or possibly even a whale.” Seems to work 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/33 "2003-02-05T01:25:50Z")
What was that Weird Al song? “You’re the woman that I’ve always dreamed of. Well, not really. But you’re good enough for now.” ---
**Author:** ![Elenfair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cc9497/32.png) [@Elenfair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elenfair)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/34 "2003-02-05T01:30:17Z")
… to infinity, plus 1 ! Works forks for me… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![FranticMad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c68b51/32.png) [@FranticMad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FranticMad)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/35 "2003-02-05T01:34:56Z")
“Almost as much as my truck.” ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/36 "2003-02-05T01:35:20Z")
“I love you.” “I know.” Worked for Han Solo, works for me. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/37 "2003-02-05T01:40:45Z")
Typical exchange in FairyChatLand: - Love you. = Love you more. - How do you figure? = Just do. We take turns starting this conversation. It usually ends with smooching. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/38 "2003-02-05T01:58:44Z")
With the white hot intensity of a thousand suns. Now that’s hot! ---
**Author:** ![djxiii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6f9a4e/32.png) [@djxiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/djxiii)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/39 "2003-02-05T02:41:53Z")
Answers that I have had come out of my mouth in the past: More than I ever imagined I would love anyone. (got good results) _click_ More than I love getting the highscore on that game I just turned off at level 10 a heartbeat before I would have set the new one. (got amazing results) more than your sister. Although she did look nice today. (got a bruise on my shoulder) My son has me beaten though. The exchange went like this between my now ex-wife and my son (age 6 at the time). X: I love you this much! (hands at arms length apart) Kaithan: I love you this much. (fingers about an inch apart) X: why so little? K: It’s not little, it just means you are always close enough to hug! X: _cries_ ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784/40 "2003-02-05T03:05:45Z")
“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. 1 2 3 4 …” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-love-you-how-much/152784.md?page=3)