# I’m getting a little sick of everyone having their hand out! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 13, 2024, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467 "2024-05-13T03:36:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/1 "2024-05-13T03:36:10Z")
It seems that everywhere I go, some entity is begging me for money. At the grocery store it’s “Round up for Education” (which I usually do, but don’t I pay taxes for this?). At Firehouse Subs, it’s some First Responder fund. At the hardware store, it’s “Fight Hunger.” And, as always, there’s a tip expected at any food vendor, regardless of if there is table service or not, on top of some other charity begging. I think the automated payment systems (I use Apple Pay for most transactions) make it just a bit too easy to beg for money. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/2 "2024-05-13T04:43:49Z")
Last week, at a bakery counter, I asked for a peanut butter cookie. The clerk put it into a bag, rang it up, moved the tip jar from next to the register to right in front of me, and handed me the bag. For the first time since Covid, I didn’t leave a tip. ---
**Author:** ![flurb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/51bf81/32.png) [@flurb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flurb)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/3 "2024-05-13T04:47:12Z")
Honestly, the omnipresence of the “Do you want to leave a tip” at every single point of sale (I got that screen ringing up at freakin’ gas station, FFS) has made it easier for me to just hit ‘no’ without a second thought. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/4 "2024-05-13T06:58:55Z")
Let’s not start on TV begger-mercials. I’m just so sick of them. If I was ever gonna plop my $19 a month down on them, I won’t now. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/5 "2024-05-13T07:27:21Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > At Firehouse Subs, it’s some First Responder fund. I mean, it’s called Firehouse Subs for a reason. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/6 "2024-05-13T11:38:53Z")
At the stores that have the “Round Up For Whatever” I can’t help but wonder if they write off all those round-ups as a charitable donation, even tho the store itself didn’t donate. Maybe I’m too cynical. But I still don’t donate. I’ll choose my causes myself, thanks. One that really irritates me is Wounded Warrior Project. Waaaaaaay back when I enlisted, the recruiter told me how, as a veteran, I’d be taken care of for life if something happened. Did he lie? Shouldn’t the VA be caring for veterans who sustained injuries while serving? Yeah, having dealt with the VA because of my husband’s injury/partial disability, I know… ---
**Author:** ![Dandan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@Dandan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dandan)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 11:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/7 "2024-05-13T11:52:16Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > At the stores that have the “Round Up For Whatever” I can’t help but wonder if they write off all those round-ups as a charitable donation, even tho the store itself didn’t donate. If the store matched my roundup, then… Dan ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/8 "2024-05-13T11:57:54Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > I can’t help but wonder if they write off all those round-ups as a charitable donation They likely do, but keep in mind in order to report that money as a donation, they also have to report it as income. As far as the taxes they pay, it’s a wash. > [@flurb](#): > > Honestly, the omnipresence of the “Do you want to leave a tip” at every single point of sale (I got that screen ringing up at freakin’ gas station, FFS) That one I can give them (in some cases) the benefit of the doubt. Credit card/POS machines often have a built in tip calculator. In odd cases, like a gas station, I usually assume the merchant doesn’t know it’s turned on or doesn’t know how to turn it off. ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/9 "2024-05-13T12:02:09Z")
I thought Round -Up was a weedkiller. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/10 "2024-05-13T12:04:08Z")
My view on this is that all charities are subject to the same downfalls as all organizations – no matter how well-intentioned they are, once they get big enough, they become self-serving bureaucracies seeking only further growth. The biggest problem I had when I was still in the workforce was big charitable conglomerates like United Way insinuating themselves into big businesses and conniving their way into make these organizations corporate contributors. This didn’t mean that the corporation itself needed to contribute a cent; it meant that it subtly pressured its employees to sign up to make contributions, which they could then advertise as a PR thing about how bountiful they were. I absolutely rebel at this kind of pressure, where the implication is that you either contribute or reveal yourself to be a cheapskate or an uncaring sociopath. This sort of pressure is downright unethical. I contribute to causes that I think are worthwhile, and it makes me feel good to do it. I absolutely refuse to contribute to any charity that pressures me to do so. Some of the major charities also enlist major retailers to collect for them at checkout. I’m somewhat neutral on this as the cashiers appear to have been instructed to avoid any sense of judgment about whether someone contributes or not, but I still think it’s vaguely sleazy. OTOH, worthwhile charities have to get their money somehow. I just wish there were more charities concerned with poor dogs and cats many of whom are also needy. ---
**Author:** ![velomont](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/8491ac/32.png) [@velomont](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/velomont)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/11 "2024-05-13T12:05:34Z")
My personal piss-off is the local fire dept doing a cash collection at a busy suburban intersection. I’ve seen this on six-lane arterials they’re there with a boot and while I’ve got my foot on the brake I’m supposed to fuck around to get my wallet out of my pocket, grab some cash and drop it in the boot while also paying attention to the traffic light. I’ve never heard of this causing a fender-bender or something and that surprises the hell out of me. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/12 "2024-05-13T12:14:29Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > I absolutely rebel at this kind of pressure, where the implication is that you either contribute or reveal yourself to be a cheapskate or an uncaring sociopath We get a lot of 'donate to Children’s Hospital" stuff around here. I find that one, in specific, insulting. It’s a hospital and I have a hard time believing they can’t cover their bills with the income generated by patients. Usually when I’m asked to donate, my reply is a simple no thanks with a mention of how much I’ve given them over the years to pay bills for my daughter (but nicely, it’s not the cashier’s fault that their employer is doing this). > [@velomont](#): > > I’ve seen this on six-lane arterials they’re there with a boot and while I’ve got my foot on the brake I’m supposed to fuck around to get my wallet out of my pocket, grab some cash and drop it in the boot while also paying attention to the traffic light The funny thing is, that’s the same reason the police use for shooing away panhandlers from those exact same locations. And, FWIW, I’m just as uncomfortable with a firefighter at my window while I’m stuck at a red light as I am with someone panhandling. If they’re going to do the fill the boot thing, I’d rather see them at the exit of a grocery store parking lot where things are a bit less chaotic. Plus, the stores like it as people will come TO donate, then shop there as well. At my place, we’re always more than happy to let the FD set up in the parking lot for a few hours to raise money for something or another. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/13 "2024-05-13T12:43:09Z")
The worst is during the times when scouts have fundraisers and they’re everywhere. Don’t get me wrong, my kids were both scouts and I’ve bought my share of that overpriced crap in the past, and when I worked in an office I’d buy an occasional something from a coworker who brought in a signup form for their kid. But if I have a few errands to run on a Saturday morning I can run into several enclaves of them. So I’m forced to lie to children. They look up at you with big doe eyes and say “can you help us out and buy some cookies / popcorn / etc., pleeeease?” “Uh, sorry, I, um, already bought some”. ---
**Author:** ![Jaycat.again](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jaycat.again/32/11525_2.png) [@Jaycat.again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaycat.again)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/14 "2024-05-13T12:52:01Z")
> [@solost](#): > > So I’m forced to lie to children. I ask them for the gluten-free cookies. That shuts them up. ---
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/15 "2024-05-13T13:09:06Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Let’s not start on TV begger-mercials. > I’m just so sick of them. No “adowable bwanket” for you! > [@velomont](#): > > My personal piss-off is the local fire dept doing a cash collection at a busy suburban intersection. A few years ago some clever imposters got a hold of firefighter-“looking” gear and set up shop at an intersection nearby where the real firefighters were doing the fill the boot thing. Never give money to beggars standing in traffic. ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/16 "2024-05-13T13:11:46Z")
I don’t know. I think the disparity of wealth and the disparity of need in this world is so great, I am kind of surprised how little charity I am asked to provide. ---
**Author:** ![Jasmine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jasmine/32/2964_2.png) [@Jasmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jasmine)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/17 "2024-05-13T14:15:40Z")
My favorite story is from several years ago. I was stuck in the McDonald’s drive through when a young, perfectly healthy looking young man walked up to my driver’s side window to panhandle. He had a pack of cigarettes sticking out of his breast pocket and a diamond stud in his left ear. Really?! Suffice it to say that I just raised my window and looked straight ahead. LOL ---
**Author:** ![Jay\_Z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Jay\_Z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jay_Z)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/18 "2024-05-13T14:19:01Z")
> [@Biotop](#): > > I don’t know. I think the disparity of wealth and the disparity of need in this world is so great, I am kind of surprised how little charity I am asked to provide. With an enormous disparity of wealth, you shouldn’t be asked to provide as much charity, because the ability of you to provide charity would likely be less. Better to seek out the few that can actually provide charity than ask randoms. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/19 "2024-05-13T14:22:59Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > It seems that everywhere I go, some entity is begging me for money. I watched a stand-up comic’s act (sorry, don’t remember who it was) and he said he was recently mugged at gunpoint. In handing over his wallet he wondered, “I dunno, do I give a gratuity?” mmm ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2024, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467/20 "2024-05-13T14:36:21Z")
> [@solost](#): > > overpriced crap Overpriced is right! The Boy Scouts were selling popcorn at the entrance of a store. A SMALL bag of caramel popcorn was around $25! I could buy 4 boxes of Girl Scout cookies for less than that. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-m-getting-a-little-sick-of-everyone-having-their-hand-out/1001467.md?page=2)