# I may actually go insane with anger **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 18, 2012, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848 "2012-08-18T03:04:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 21
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/401 "2012-08-22T02:29:40Z")
> [@emeraldia](#): > > Why limit yourself? Why hold yourself back? You’re not communicating this to the actual person, you are just _venting_ about that person. If you are extremely frustrated/infuriated then it stands to reason that you’d express yourself in an extreme way. If you had an opportunity to use a slur or some highly offensive word- but decided not to- I would question your sincerity. I’ve heard stupider things, but not many. Racist epithets not only slander the person you’re pissed at, but everyone else who shares their race. Do you think that, if I’m angry at an individual, I must also be angry at their entire race? Or do you deny that racist epithets slander a race? ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/402 "2012-08-22T02:53:58Z")
> [@emeraldia](#): > > Why limit yourself? Why hold yourself back? You’re not communicating this to the actual person, you are just _venting_ about that person. If you are extremely frustrated/infuriated then it stands to reason that you’d express yourself in an extreme way. If you had an opportunity to use a slur or some highly offensive word- but decided not to- I would question your sincerity. > > In seriousness, if he had called the driver a f **king bi\*ch, would people have made a big deal out of him being a sexist? I doubt it. If he called her a c** t, then it would not be OK. The OP was obviously extremely upset and didn’t even use a full-blown slur. They even named a college fund after it. Should he have said it? No. Grand scheme of things? Not the end of the world. > > Terrorist threats vs. a word that is arbitrarily offensive. - Not sure why the focus is on the latter. I bet if he posts the video we may see why he was mad. “Not the end of the world”??? No shit, Sherlock! We’re chiding him on a message board in a thread alongside “Why is my dog so thin? Fuck you, that’s why” and “No, Mr. NY Times art critic…a dildo up your butt is NOT art.” I’d hope that if we thought this really was end-of-the-world serious, we’d at least start a facebook meme! Clearly you are the one taking this far too seriously. You’ve admitted he shouldn’t have said it, so you pretty much agree with us. That said, this is a very diverse message board and several posters have described somewhat emotionally how those words have hurt them and have the potential to. Telling someone that they shouldn’t be upset about that, _when you’ve acknowledged that it was wrong to say_ is being a major league jerk. We know _you_ don’t care, but why defend something you know is wrong, if not to _make_ it a big deal by adding to the hurt? It’s not your fucking job to police the rest of us and make sure we don’t make too big a deal of things that you don’t happen to care about. And the idea that we’re a bunch of PC police in vapors because he used the word “negro” is simply false. He didn’t blurt out the word “negro” as an ersatz curse word, he used it matter-of-factly in describing the event to us later. It is perfectly reasonable for us to infer a certain attitude about race from that, especially in combination with the other behavior he described and the fact that _he was accused of using the word “nigger”_ during the event. Finally, the idea that my anger isn’t sincere unless I use every possible invective I can think of is just unbelievably stupid. No one in my family (despite living in Arkansas) uses racial slurs, and I never use them in normal conversation, so it just doesn’t occur to me to use them in anger. The fact that they apparently spring immediately into your mind says something about your environment and your character. It’s not a horrible indictment, but it’s certainly nothing to be proud of. Admit it’s a fault you have and go and sin no more. That’s all anyone expects. Refusing to even consider changing an acknowledged fault is the sign of a jerk, not an enlightened being. You admit it’s wrong, you admit doing it, you know that people are hurt by it (however unreasonable their feelings may seem to _you_) but you think _we’re_ bad guys for not embracing racist slurs as a tool for venting? 😕 The mind boggles. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/403 "2012-08-22T03:08:25Z")
> [@emeraldia](#): > > Why limit yourself? Why hold yourself back? You’re not communicating this to the actual person, you are just _venting_ about that person. If you are extremely frustrated/infuriated then it stands to reason that you’d express yourself in an extreme way. If you had an opportunity to use a slur or some highly offensive word- but decided not to- I would question your sincerity. Honestly, and I do mean honestly, calling someone a “faggot” or a “nigger” does not instill in me a feeling of catharsis. Quite the opposite, in fact. I really don’t see how venting about someone’s sexual orientation or race has anything to do with assuaging my personal frustration, unless I somehow thought those characteristics were germane to my angst. I really don’t understand this attitude. I use slurs, sure. I use offensive words, yeah. But I don’t call someone a “nigger” just to “express [myself] in an extreme way.” ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/404 "2012-08-22T03:12:40Z")
> [@emeraldia](#): > > In seriousness, if he had called the driver a f **king bi\*ch, would people have made a big deal out of him being a sexist? I doubt it. If he called her a c** t, then it would not be OK. Uh, he _did_ call her a “worthless cunt”, and also a “cocksucking whore”, right in the OP. You are correct that a big deal was not made about this, but he also didn’t claim to have been falsely accused of using obscenities or sexist slurs in the very same post where he described a woman in this manner. > [@](#): > > The OP was obviously extremely upset and didn’t even use a full-blown slur. Well, not in his description of the man. The driver was referred to using a word that you apparently consider a “full-blown slur” and “not OK”, although in your rush to defend \*\*ducati \*\*perhaps you did not notice this. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/405 "2012-08-22T03:37:50Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > Do you seriously think “cunt” is some sort of analogous slur applied to white people? That just makes no sense, given that “cunt” refers to sex and not color. A black woman can be as much of a “cunt” as a white woman. What the argument are you trying to make here? > > But, seriously, there is no pejorative for whites analogous to “nigger” in US society. The social dynamic and history makes that impossible. Yes, this is the point. “Cunt” doesn’t oppress _white people_ as a race. It might be used to oppress women, regardless of race. So while it might be a female equivalent of the N-word, it is not a white equivalent of the N-word. White people simply cannot be put in that position for _being white_. ---
**Author:** ![emeraldia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@emeraldia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emeraldia)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/406 "2012-08-22T05:15:21Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > I’ve heard stupider things, but not many. Racist epithets not only slander the person you’re pissed at, but everyone else who shares their race. Do you think that, if I’m angry at an individual, I must also be angry at their entire race? Or do you deny that racist epithets slander a race? No, you’re not going after their race. You are saying that this particular individual is a _bad version of_ their race. You’re essentially saying that this person is a corrupted version of their race. If I call someone ‘white trash’, I’m not insulting white people. I’m saying they are a terrible manifestation of a white person. It doesn’t slander a race anymore than calling someone a bi_ch slanders an entire sex. No.. a bi_tch is a woman with a negative set of traits. White trash is a white person with a negative set of traits. ---
**Author:** ![emeraldia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@emeraldia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emeraldia)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/407 "2012-08-22T05:32:40Z")
> [@Alan\_Smithee](#): > > Finally, the idea that my anger isn’t sincere unless I use every possible invective I can think of is just unbelievably stupid. I was being somewhat facetious. > [@](#): > > You admit it’s wrong, you admit doing it, you know that people are hurt by it (however unreasonable their feelings may seem to _you_) I just think too much was made out of his statement given what happened (assuming it’s true.) ---
**Author:** ![emeraldia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@emeraldia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emeraldia)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/408 "2012-08-22T05:43:00Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > Uh, he _did_ call her a “worthless cunt”, and also a “cocksucking whore”, right in the OP. Ahh.. well I did indeed miss that. Truthfully, it was clear to me right off the bat that the OP was off-the-wall angry and I just kind of dismissed the “worthless c_nt", c_cksucking wh_re", "large angry ne_ro”, “and jump off the Empire State Building” stuff as angry hyperbole/venting. > [@](#): > > You are correct that a big deal was not made about this, but he also didn’t claim to have been falsely accused of using obscenities or sexist slurs in the very same post where he described a woman in this manner. Well, not in his description of the man. The driver was referred to using a word that you apparently consider a “full-blown slur” and “not OK”, although in your rush to defend \*\*ducati \*\*perhaps you did not notice this. I haven’t defended him so much as pointed out that it doesn’t seem fair to paint _him_ as the “bad guy”. If you take him at his word, then he was the good guy. I’m not certain that I take him at his word, and I would like to see the videos for fun. But if one assumes what he is saying is true, then he is the good guy, not the bad guy. And his stupid statement doesnt’ change that. ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/409 "2012-08-22T06:41:30Z")
But it _does_ change whether we do want to take him at his word! Very much so. And even if we take his (initial) description of events at face value apart from any conclusions he draws or inferences he makes, it’s still very far from clear that he’s not the bad guy. It’s only if we accept not only his facts but his interpretation of them as true that he’s clearly not the bad guy, but some of his interpretations (e.g., that the woman hit the dog deliberately) are clearly false. ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/410 "2012-08-22T14:51:41Z")
> [@emeralia](#): > > White trash is a white person with a negative set of traits. and is utterly superfluous unless used to further impugn their character. Libertarian trash, I can understand. White trash as a term I haven’t seen seriously other than in _Birth of a Nation_ or _Gone With the Wind_, can’t recall which (apart from this thread that is). Why is it relevant that they’re trash that is white, other than if one tends to assume that trashy people aren’t white? It’s the same disingenuous shit with the “[black cunt](http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/jul/09/john-terry-response-taunts-court)” comments. ---
**Author:** ![emeraldia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@emeraldia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emeraldia)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/411 "2012-08-22T15:19:39Z")
> [@gamerunknown](#): > > and is utterly superfluous unless used to further impugn their character. Libertarian trash, I can understand. White trash as a term I haven’t seen seriously other than in _Birth of a Nation_ or _Gone With the Wind_, can’t recall which (apart from this thread that is). Why is it relevant that they’re trash that is white, other than if one tends to assume that trashy people aren’t white? It’s the same disingenuous shit with the “[black cunt](http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2012/jul/09/john-terry-response-taunts-court)” comments. Black c_nt is generic. There are c_nts from all different walks of life. White trash conjures a very specific type of person, with a certain set of traits, that are unique to whites. “Trailer trash” is automatically white, for example without even mentioning the race. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/412 "2012-08-22T16:19:47Z")
> [@emeraldia](#): > > There are c\*nts from all different walks of life. Oh, God. You’re not about to sing _another_ song, are you Jiminy? ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/413 "2012-08-22T16:57:33Z")
> [@gamerunknown](#): > > Why is it relevant that they’re trash that is white, other than if **one tends to assume that trashy people aren’t white**? That’s exactly it, actually. The term “white trash” is absolutely a racist one–_against black people_. It is predicated on the idea that a white person who is lazy, uneducated, uncouth, promiscuous, shiftless, or criminal is showing attributes to be typically expected in black people, i.e., in trash. “A terrible manifestation of a white person,” one might say. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/414 "2012-08-22T17:13:58Z")
There’s something sublime about a person who has no qualms calling a black person a nigger - provided he’s angry enough at him - but won’t spell it out on a message board without asterisks. A genteel racist, no doubt. ---
**Author:** ![MacCat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maccat/32/216_2.png) [@MacCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacCat)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/415 "2012-08-22T20:57:52Z")
> [@Peremensoe](#): > > That’s exactly it, actually. > > The term “white trash” is absolutely a racist one–_against black people_. It is predicated on the idea that a white person who is lazy, uneducated, uncouth, promiscuous, shiftless, or criminal is showing attributes to be typically expected in black people, i.e., in trash. “A terrible manifestation of a white person,” one might say. Exactly! Thank you gamerunknown and Peremensoe, you both said it better than I would have. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/416 "2012-08-22T23:27:48Z")
> [@ducati](#): > > TL/DR: Evil always triumphs. Crime pays. Fuck everyone you can; it don’t cost nothin. > If you’re a juror and someone claims insanity for murdering someone that hurt their family - acquit them before lunch and head for IHOP. > > Earlier as I looked out my front window, I see my two [idiot dogs](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v677/ural/dogs/Picture42244.jpg)romping in the street. > They’ve somehow escaped the fenced yard and made it to the Danger Zone. > > They’re never allowed out front for obvious reasons. They will never obey commands to return, just run hell-for-leather with their occasional freedom. Forget the acre in back they command… > > Just as I rose to go chase them, some cocksucking whore ran [this one](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v677/ural/dogs/Picture25501.jpg)over with her SUV. > … > BTW, dog is fine; got rolled under the middle, not squished by tire, otherwise I’d be typing from jail. Apparently we have met before > **[Next time I will hit your dog!](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=371482)** > > I own a small computer repair business, my vehicle has graphics and a phone number on it…works great the graphics have easily paid for themselves in 5 months. Yesterday I get a phone call from someone wanting to complain about one of our drivers. I... and since its the PIT. Wait you would have attacked another human being because your poorly trained poorly fenced dogs got out into the street where oh I dont know CARS drive. You sir have bug or two in your moral source code and sense of responsibilty for your part of this potential tragedy. You are responsible for your animals safety, you failed, then want to blame others for your failure. Last I heard there is no “citation for failure to brake for cute little doggies that run out in the street” section of the vehicle code. In fact I have seen this happen several times in my life, how many times did it result in cops and citations…zero. She ran probably because she was scared of you, the frothing guy running out yelling at her not knowing if you just want to vent or kill her. Called the cops…because she _almost_ hurt your dog. Wow… I guarandamtee you, the cops could give a shit less about your dog and are more worried about defusing a potentially violent confrontation between you and the neighbor. You want to play this card, prepare to be held responsible for thousands, or tens of thousands of dollars in damage if someone crashes trying to evade your pwecious pooch. Shall we go for criminal responsibility too like if your dog bites someone? FTR in my EMT days I killed a dog with my ambulance, didn’t mean to, but I am not taking evasive action over a 30 pound dog while I have a patient on board, nor am I going to stop and discuss it with anyone. I reported it to my supervisor in case anyone complained and went on with my day. Then again, I saw horrifically injured people die every so often and heard little kids screaming in terror as they sawed through the car to get to them, crushed dogs don’t much ping my radar beyond a “gee, that sucks”. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/417 "2012-08-23T00:29:57Z")
> [@emeraldia](#): > > Ahh.. well I did indeed miss that. Truthfully, it was clear to me right off the bat that the OP was off-the-wall angry and I just kind of dismissed the “worthless c_nt", c_cksucking wh_re", "large angry ne_ro”, “and jump off the Empire State Building” stuff as angry hyperbole/venting. Well yes, it is pretty clear that the OP was angry, but that isn’t much of an excuse, particularly considering how unjustified his anger was. Remember, _his dog wasn’t even hit_! It had a frightening near miss, but was fine. A reasonable person would have been relieved to see that his pet was okay rather then flying into a rage at a driver who _avoided_ hitting a dog that was running loose in the street. > [@](#): > > I haven’t defended him so much as pointed out that it doesn’t seem fair to paint _him_ as the “bad guy”. If you take him at his word, then he was the good guy. I’m not certain that I take him at his word, and I would like to see the videos for fun. But if one assumes what he is saying is true, then he is the good guy, not the bad guy. And his stupid statement doesnt’ change that. What about the actions described in the OP make him “good”? Even if everything he said was true – and since we’re in the Pit now, I am free to say that I suspect that portions of the post were outright lies – he decided to play vigilante and track down an innocent woman to…well, he didn’t say what he was planning to do to her, but it didn’t sound like he wanted to thank her for managing not to injure his dog. Had **ducati** stayed home with his lucky, unharmed dog and counted his blessings then he could have avoided the entire encounter with the driver’s husband/boyfriend. ---
**Author:** ![Enkel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/df705f/32.png) [@Enkel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enkel)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/418 "2012-08-23T02:40:35Z")
> [@Peremensoe](#): > > The term “white trash” is absolutely a racist one–_against black people_. It is predicated on the idea that a white person who is lazy, uneducated, uncouth, promiscuous, shiftless, or criminal is showing attributes to be typically expected in black people, i.e., in trash. “A terrible manifestation of a white person,” one might say. Slight derail for an honest question. I would never have thought of “White Trash” as a racist remark. In my area, it is usually “Trailer Trash” or “Red Neck” and it really is driven by how many pieces of furniture, appliances and vehicles you have in your yard and if you actually live in a trailer or a house. My go-to is “stupid fucking inbreds” and, in my area, many times inbred is actually an accurate statement (not sister/brother, but close cousins are fair game). I’m thinking that there is no way this can be racist. But then again, I never thought about the origins of “White Trash” either. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/419 "2012-08-23T02:51:28Z")
White trash is racist (against blacks) because it uses the modifier ‘white’. The default trash, of course, is black (not endorsing ths idea, just explaining!). What makes it an insult to white folks is that white being trash is not the default state, so those folks must be really bad if they’re trash! ---
**Author:** ![emeraldia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@emeraldia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emeraldia)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848/420 "2012-08-23T07:42:25Z")
> [@Peremensoe](#): > > That’s exactly it, actually. > > The term “white trash” is absolutely a racist one–_against black people_. It is predicated on the idea that a white person who is lazy, uneducated, uncouth, promiscuous, shiftless, or criminal is showing attributes to be typically expected in black people, i.e., in trash. “A terrible manifestation of a white person,” one might say. I didn’t coin the phrase. I don’t see how it is against black people though. I’ve never heard of black people being referred to in terms of being “trash”. White trash eats spam, lives in a trailer, missing teeth, hypocritical prejudices against other races, alcoholic, wears wife-beater shirts, etc. There are tons of them that are completely unrelated to negative black stereotypes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848.md?page=20) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-may-actually-go-insane-with-anger/631848.md?page=22)