# I need a camel **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 30, 2014, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609 "2014-05-30T01:27:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Isosleepy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/isosleepy/32/479_2.png) [@Isosleepy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isosleepy)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/1 "2014-05-30T01:27:26Z")
Preferably of a pleasant disposition. early July, near Marlborough, Mass. Do you have one I may borrow or rent for a day? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/2 "2014-05-30T03:41:30Z")
Assuming this is a serious request, you need an animal wrangler. You can do an online search of your own but I did a quick one and found [William Berloni Theatrical Animals, Inc.](http://www.theatricalanimals.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/3 "2014-05-30T04:14:24Z")
> [@Isosleepy](#): > > Preferably of a pleasant disposition. early July, near Marlborough, Mass. Do you have one I may borrow or rent for a day? Bactrian, or dromedary? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/4 "2014-05-30T04:41:16Z")
You might have to walk a mile for one. ---
**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/5 "2014-05-30T05:23:26Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > You might have to walk a mile for one. I did not think you were that old… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/6 "2014-05-30T06:31:22Z")
I need a camel too. I didn’t realize that I needed one before you posted this thread, but upon further consideration, I must have one! ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 10:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/7 "2014-05-30T10:18:54Z")
I’m sorry to report that on the whole, camels are a dour lot. Not particularly dangerous or aggressive, but stubborn and unfriendly. (I speak of dromedaries. I don’t know anything about bactrians.) ---
**Author:** ![Sahirrnee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sahirrnee/32/13937_2.png) [@Sahirrnee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sahirrnee)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/8 "2014-05-30T11:20:55Z")
You could start with this and go from there [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-50GjySwew](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-50GjySwew) ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/9 "2014-05-30T11:29:56Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > I need a camel too. And I need a camel toe. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/10 "2014-05-30T13:09:59Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#): > > I’m sorry to report that on the whole, camels are a dour lot. Not particularly dangerous or aggressive, but stubborn and unfriendly. > > (I speak of dromedaries. I don’t know anything about bactrians.) I was going to suggest that regardless of location and time the OP’s wish for a pleasant dispositon was dooming this request to failure. ---
**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/11 "2014-05-30T14:04:04Z")
Oh god, no! We ride the camel to the brothel! ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/12 "2014-05-30T14:12:19Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > Bactrian, or dromedary? Filtered or unfiltered? ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/13 "2014-05-30T14:23:19Z")
[I think I originally heard this joke here so credit to whoever’s joke I’m stealing] An old retired guy in Miami decides that he wants a camel. He orders one, it arrives and he’s delighted. He gets on its back and spends the day tromping through the neighborhood waving to everyone and basically acting like this is the greatest thing in the world. Next morning, he goes outside and the camel’s gone. He calls the police and the officer starts taking notes. “Can you tell me how tall the camel was?” “No, I only had it for one day. I never measured it.” “Can you tell me how much it weighed?” “No, I only had it the one day. I never weighed it.” Exasperated, the cop asks “Can you at least say if it was a boy or girl?” “YES!” the man cries, “It was a BOY!” The cop says “You sound really confident of this.” The man says “All day when I was riding it, everyone kept saying ‘Hey, get a load of the schmuck on that camel!’” ---
**Author:** ![Vita\_Beata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@Vita\_Beata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vita_Beata)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/14 "2014-05-30T14:30:33Z")
An englishman an irishman and a scotsman were in the sweltering desert walking around looking desperatly for something to eat and drink, when, as if out of nowhere, a camel appeared. The englishman caught the camel and spluttered I support “Liverpool, so I suppose I better eat the liver.” The scotsman immediately shouted, “Well I support Hearts so I’ll eat the heart.” And then the irishman said, “I support Arsenal, but I don’t feel hungry any more.” Isosleepy, Good luck in your camel quest. ---
**Author:** ![Isosleepy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/isosleepy/32/479_2.png) [@Isosleepy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isosleepy)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/15 "2014-05-30T15:30:41Z")
bismillah! that prancing video will take lifetimes to un-see! The camel is for a costume party. The SO claims I don’t always make enough effort, so I’ll show _her_. I’m going as Lawrence of Arabia, so a camel would make for a nice completion of the costume I think. Unless it bites, hence the request for a sunny disposition. I know pretty much all camels bite, but maybe there’s one non-biting camel out there, and maybe it happens to be just north of Beantown. For authenticity I’d prefer a dromedary, but I’m pretty sure showing up with _any_ camel will blow the doors off of any lame swan dress. Also, showing up with a camel likely shortens the time I’m welcome at the party (they’re not real good with using litter boxes) - another plus. Otherwise I’d have asked if you fine people could point me to a swan dress in men’s size XL ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/16 "2014-05-30T15:36:45Z")
> [@GusNSpot](#): > > I did not think you were that old… 😃 What, are you kidding? I’m an Eisenhower baby. I remember cigarette commercials on TV! ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/17 "2014-05-30T15:40:39Z")
In a pinch you could put a fake hump on a llama and say it’s a baby camel. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/18 "2014-05-30T15:47:01Z")
A camel near Marlborough? If the OP weren’t a member, I would think this was a weird cigarette ad from a bot. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/19 "2014-05-30T15:49:27Z")
> [@Isosleepy](#): > > Also, showing up with a camel likely shortens the time I’m welcome at the party (they’re not real good with using litter boxes) - another plus. Years ago we were invited to a neighbor’s Halloween party. We didn’t really want to go, but they are neighbors, so… My gf purchased a [headless horseman costume](http://i681.photobucket.com/albums/vv174/kayaker01/halloweenie.jpg) and I was a zombie. I walked, she rode, people ooohed and awed and we went home!! ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [May 30, 2014, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609/20 "2014-05-30T16:14:24Z")
There is a camel ranch down the road from me, but sadly for you it is on the west coast. No help. Might be easier to find a Brough Superior. More fun and less mess, too! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-a-camel/689609.md?page=2)