# I need an excuse not to receive a birthday present **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 22, 2017, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508 "2017-02-22T20:48:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/21 "2017-02-23T01:37:49Z")
> [@ioioio](#): > > Save the gift certificate and give it back to her on her birthday. YES! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/22 "2017-02-23T01:39:18Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Accept it and send it to me. PM for address. Which vendor would you like? This forum requires that you wait 60 seconds between posts. Please try again in 2 seconds. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/23 "2017-02-23T02:27:25Z")
Is there a list to pick from? ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/24 "2017-02-23T02:57:13Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Is there a list to pick from? I was not given a list. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/25 "2017-02-23T03:03:42Z")
Take it and tear it up and throw the confetti in her stupid face. ---
**Author:** ![Flughund4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f17d59/32.png) [@Flughund4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flughund4)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/26 "2017-02-23T03:29:19Z")
I would just say, firmly, “Thank you, but I’m not into exchanging birthday or holiday gifts at work.” Fair warning when they don’t receive anything in return. See, this is why I never let slip at work any hint of what my birth date is in the first place. In over 15 years of working with them, none of my co-workers have a clue what it is. I neither want to get them gifts, nor receive any from them. They’ve tried to organize social events outside of work, but I’ve always managed to evade them. Not because they’re not worth socializing with, but because I like to keep my work life and private life separate. By now, they’ve gotten the hint. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/27 "2017-02-23T04:19:28Z")
Tell her your birthday is February 29th. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/28 "2017-02-23T05:12:47Z")
“I’m really not in a position where I can exchange gifts. I really appreciate this gift, but I want to be fair and up front about this. Thank you so very much - I appreciate the thought”. Or Just buy shitty dollar store gifts and I promise next year it won’t be a thing. ---
**Author:** ![Fruitbat2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5e9695/32.png) [@Fruitbat2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fruitbat2)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/29 "2017-02-23T05:23:44Z")
Perhaps say “I appreciate the thought but please don’t get me a gift. I don’t like bothering with all the gift exchange stuff.” Then if she gives it to you anyway, spend it and enjoy it and don’t reciprocate. You warned her. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/30 "2017-02-23T05:26:48Z")
What store is it for? If it’s appropriate, buy something the whole office can use, and forget about it. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/31 "2017-02-23T13:27:37Z")
> [@snfaulkner](#): > > Take it and tear it up and throw the confetti in her stupid face. Ah, but the thermostat… ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2017, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/32 "2017-02-23T13:32:02Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > I don’t want to reciprocate and begin a big happy family when most of them are dummies. They’re the dummies with whom you work. If it’s not about the financial burden, suck it up and engage in office feel-good activities. You’ll be happier for it in the long run. ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2017, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/33 "2017-02-24T14:04:03Z")
Update? Ideally you’d be able to decline the gift in a gracious way that didn’t piss her off, and that would be the end of it. Easier said than done. If you wind up being intimidated into accepting the gift, do not reciprocate on her birthday. That way lies an unending tradition. If possible, use the gift card for something for your whole group, and, on her birthday, send her electronic good wishes. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2017, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/34 "2017-02-24T14:25:04Z")
I responded that I’ve quit celebrating birthdays, and the thermostat remains at a comfortable level. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2017, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/35 "2017-02-24T16:09:41Z")
Use it to buy a gift for the office, like a box of chocolates or a fruit basket. Now you look generous, and you didn’t spend a dime. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2017, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/36 "2017-02-24T16:46:12Z")
Just say, “I would prefer not to.” ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2017, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/37 "2017-02-25T19:01:34Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > I responded that I’ve quit celebrating birthdays, and the thermostat remains at a comfortable level. Does this mean I get nothin’? ☹ ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2017, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/38 "2017-02-26T13:49:18Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Does this mean I get nothin’? ☹ I’ll save you a doughnut Monday morning. Plain or chocolate covered? ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2017, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/39 "2017-02-26T14:03:53Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Just say, “I would prefer not to.” Nerd. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@Dead\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Cat)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2017, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508/40 "2017-02-28T19:31:00Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Tell her your birthday is February 29th. Best make it February 30th otherwise you’re just deferring the problem 3 years. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-excuse-not-to-receive-a-birthday-present/780508.md?page=1)