# I need an insult. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 22, 2002, 10:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361 "2002-10-22T10:48:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/21 "2002-10-22T14:41:23Z")
sphinctertots? pubeflossers? brisfits? fartbottlers? urine goodhanders? ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/22 "2002-10-22T16:45:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lieu \* > \*\*urine goodhanders? \*\* 😃 fartford ? wetma ? screwdential ? ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/23 "2002-10-22T16:47:58Z")
Nut twisters? ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/24 "2002-10-22T17:12:51Z")
mooncalf harlequin addlepated numbskull ---
**Author:** ![B\_Williams](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@B\_Williams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/B_Williams)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/25 "2002-10-22T17:31:33Z")
Blood sucking,West Nile infected AGENTS ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/26 "2002-10-22T19:34:48Z")
and for all us geeks… BAKA!!! ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/27 "2002-10-22T19:58:49Z")
Pond scum… ---
**Author:** ![DaToad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@DaToad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaToad)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/28 "2002-10-22T20:45:13Z")
Misanthropic drones Rectal cankers Carrion gobblers Tapeworms Satan’s heirs Popinjays ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/29 "2002-10-23T00:02:53Z")
Thanks, all. I’ve settled on “lackwits”. ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/30 "2002-10-23T01:34:59Z")
Wait! Couldn’t you consider “fell insurance company cretins”? I really like the word “cretin,” ever since it was once used in reference to me, and its origins are [simply delicious](http://www.dictionary.com/search?q=cretin). ---
**Author:** ![Osip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4491bb/32.png) [@Osip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Osip)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/31 "2002-10-23T02:23:54Z")
Dink-dinks Hobnails lumpnuts worms foo lhi opal nimrod dodo dingleberry dope bengal (for all you Cinncinati Football fans) twit scum maggot Osip moron melba toast Jerks pimplebutt pumpernickle leech lumpkin parisite (how ever you spell it) zoomer yanker yutz putz pulooka hurm will try to think of more ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/32 "2002-10-23T07:27:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by matt\_mcl \* > \*\*and for all us geeks… > > BAKA!!! \*\* Wow! Thanks for bringing back the memories! I lived in Tokyo in high school, and it’s been absolutely AGES since I’ve been called “baka.” Or better yet, “baka gaijin”! It’s even more fun when you’re getting shoved off of a train while they say it. Weirdly, that really does bring back nostalgic memories. Like wishing I knew how to say, “Fuck off; I’ve got three inches of counter space from which I am trying to eat my goddam yakisoba, and I am KEEPING it, pencil-pusher!” in Japanese. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/33 "2002-10-23T09:50:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jackelope \* > \*\* > Like wishing I knew how to say, “Fuck off; I’ve got three inches of counter space from which I am trying to eat my goddam yakisoba, and I am KEEPING it, pencil-pusher!” in Japanese. \*\* 😛 The picture this evokes is wickedly wonderful **Jackelope**. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/34 "2002-10-24T03:03:36Z")
I’m a little late on this, but perhaps for future reference, **Rilchiam** , market research conducted by the advertising firm I work with indicates that people find monkeys to be amusing and comical. Therefore, by combining an insulting term with the word “monkey”, you can create a wide range of situation-specific insults or merely humorous remarks that bystanders are guaranteed enjoy. In was on this basis that we recommended Shiseido Cosmetics to use ‘Lipmonkeys’ for their new line of glosses targeted at the youth market. That, plus I’ve gotten some good responses on the Board over my use of ‘jizzmonkey’. ---
**Author:** ![Boo\_Boo\_Foo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@Boo\_Boo\_Foo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boo_Boo_Foo)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/35 "2002-10-24T03:39:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Osip \* > \*\*foo > \*\* Hey! Back off! What have I ever done to you? 😃 Only joking… ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/36 "2002-10-24T06:02:30Z")
Thanks, **Sublight**. “Banana” is also a “funny” word. And “pie”. Hmmmm… ---
**Author:** ![bunnymom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c4cdca/32.png) [@bunnymom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bunnymom)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/37 "2002-10-24T07:51:06Z")
I’m partial to “Booger-Eatin’ Morons”. ---
**Author:** ![bj0rn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e57/32.png) [@bj0rn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bj0rn)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/38 "2002-10-24T11:44:45Z")
fíflin asnana bjánana hálfvitana bj0rn - 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2002, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361/39 "2002-10-24T14:02:46Z")
I found a pretty decent Shakespearean insult generator (and quoter, too!) at: [www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/](http://www.pangloss.com/seidel/Shaker/) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-need-an-insult/133361.md?page=1)