# I pit a Starbucks barista **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 20, 2017, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780 "2017-09-20T02:45:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/21 "2017-09-20T15:21:35Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > There isn’t another Starbucks across the street? Just go to that one, and DON’T GIVE THEM YOUR REAL NAME! > > ETA: > Jesus, where do you live, in Alaskan bush country? Alaska [has no](https://www.starbucks.com/store-locator?place=alaska) Starbucks. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/22 "2017-09-20T15:35:59Z")
That barista is just trying to do her job. Consider the risk she’s taking by learning customers’ names and using them, believe me, men start to think she actually gives a shit about them or may even want them to ask her out or something. She doesn’t. I can’t even tell you how many men thought I “liked” them when I worked retail just because I was being the level of nice required not to be fired. Just nod acknowledgement and go on with your damn day, she’s trying to do the same. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/23 "2017-09-20T15:59:27Z")
My wife and kid don’t even greet me when I walk into the house. ☹ But Trixie Dog is always the first one to come running up to the car. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/24 "2017-09-20T16:14:14Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > That barista is just trying to do her job. Consider the risk she’s taking by learning customers’ names and using them, believe me, men start to think she actually gives a shit about them or may even want them to ask her out or something. She doesn’t. I can’t even tell you how many men thought I “liked” them when I worked retail just because I was being the level of nice required not to be fired. Just nod acknowledgement and go on with your damn day, she’s trying to do the same. Nothing about her job requires her to use his name, though. So she’s not just trying to go on with her day. She’s doing something extra, and he finds that extra bit extremely uncomfortable. I acknowledge the issue of people thinking you like them. But I don’t see why that means he should just have to suck it up and be uncomfortable. She’s doing something to make him feel better, and it’s having the exact opposite effect. It would be better for both of them if she stopped. Unfortunately, our social constructs make it hard to express this desire without being branded as rude. And the people who most want to stop this are the least likely to feel comfortable enough to say something and the most likely to feel bad about being rude. Unfortunately I have no solution beyond trying to drop hints, and hope they get it. For instance, don’t respond back with a friendly wave or response. Doing that communicates that you like it. Give the minimum response, which is sorta like a very weak head nod or a weak smile or something. I admit that this isn’t a situation I care too much about. But I’m just trying to think what people have done with me when they clearly are uncomfortable. I take a bit longer than I should, but I get the hint. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Economist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c89c15/32.png) [@Evil\_Economist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Economist)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/25 "2017-09-20T16:17:23Z")
> [@Ravenman](#): > > Jesus, you need therapy or something. There’s dozens of us! Dozens! I can’t even stand having my neighbors recognize me. I need the anonymity of living in a big ass building in a big ass city and working for a big ass company where there’s too many fucking people for anyone to recognize anyone else. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/26 "2017-09-20T16:51:50Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > "You go to Starbucks?! I roast and grind my own at home, far better and cheaper " in 3 - 2 - This. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/27 "2017-09-20T17:02:51Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Nothing about her job requires her to use his name, though. So she’s not just trying to go on with her day. She’s doing something extra, and he finds that extra bit extremely uncomfortable. Have you ever worked at a Starbucks or in any retail or service oriented job? It’s completely standard for customer service people to be trained to use the customer’s name if they know it for threshold greetings and at the beginning and end of transactions. ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/28 "2017-09-20T17:28:48Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > My wife and kid don’t even greet me when I walk into the house. ☹ > > But Trixie Dog is always the first one to come running up to the car. Its the reek of Trojan. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/29 "2017-09-20T17:37:23Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > Have you ever worked at a Starbucks or in any retail or service oriented job? It’s completely standard for customer service people to be trained to use the customer’s name if they know it for threshold greetings and at the beginning and end of transactions. Yes, and since sbux asks for your name when you order coffee, so the barista can yell it out when it’s busy and your drink is ready, it follows that employees would remember the name of someone they see frequently. It’s just part of the damn job. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/30 "2017-09-20T17:49:37Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > Yes, and since sbux asks for your name when you order coffee, so the barista can yell it out when it’s busy and your drink is ready, it follows that employees would remember the name of someone they see frequently. It’s just part of the damn job. I buy used short-sleeve work-shirts from a company that supplies/launders shirts for various businesses. I pay .90 a piece in bundles of a dozen, so they are kind of disposable. Yesterday I was Tony from Exxon, the day before I was Luis from Midas. When I walk into a Starbucks or similar and am asked my name, I give whatever random name I’m using that day, avoiding my IRL name. I do this purely for shits/giggles, but maybe the OP should consider a similar approach to life. ---
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/31 "2017-09-20T17:56:00Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I buy used short-sleeve work-shirts from a company that supplies/launders shirts for various businesses. I pay .90 a piece in bundles of a dozen, so they are kind of disposable. Yesterday I was Tony from Exxon, the day before I was Luis from Midas. > > When I walk into a Starbucks or similar and am asked my name, I give whatever random name I’m using that day, avoiding my IRL name. > > I do this purely for shits/giggles, but maybe the OP should consider a similar approach to life. The problem is, in this instance, the barista already knows him. A fake mustache, maybe? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/32 "2017-09-20T17:58:28Z")
> [@Calatin](#): > > The problem is, in this instance, the barista already knows him. > > A fake mustache, maybe? [Maybe WITSEC to be sure.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Federal_Witness_Protection_Program) ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/33 "2017-09-20T18:02:18Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I buy used short-sleeve work-shirts from a company that supplies/launders shirts for various businesses. I pay .90 a piece in bundles of a dozen, so they are kind of disposable. Yesterday I was Tony from Exxon, the day before I was Luis from Midas. > > When I walk into a Starbucks or similar and am asked my name, I give whatever random name I’m using that day, avoiding my IRL name. > > I do this purely for shits/giggles, but maybe the OP should consider a similar approach to life. I love this. I would do the same. Kinda do, it’s just not a different name all the time. I adopted “Veronika” when I was in college and tend to give that name to strangers, whether it’s some jackass in a bar (original reason) or a register person asking my name so it can be yelled into the room a few minutes later. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/34 "2017-09-20T18:04:35Z")
Ask her out, but put your creative imagination in high gear to make it as totally creepy as possible. Your role model here is [the Michael Renfield character](http://www.fernbyfilms.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Renfield_1931.jpg) in the 1931 version of _Dracula_. That should take care of things. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/35 "2017-09-20T18:58:29Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > put your creative imagination in high gear to make it as totally creepy as possible. We could crowd-source this on the SDMB. I’m sure we would get LOTS of ideas. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/36 "2017-09-20T19:00:13Z")
Um… don’t give them your real name? ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/37 "2017-09-20T19:03:02Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Um… don’t give them your real name? True, but in the OP’s case that option has unfortunately sailed. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/38 "2017-09-20T19:20:15Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > "You go to Starbucks?! I roast and grind my own at home, far better and cheaper " in 3 - 2 - Phaw! I grow my own beans, even have a burro. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/39 "2017-09-20T19:26:39Z")
Okay, I need therapy too. I understand this rant! I want to be invisible and anonymous. Probably I should dress a little quieter. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/40 "2017-09-20T19:28:14Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Alaska [has no](https://www.starbucks.com/store-locator?place=alaska) Starbucks. Nah, their website is just screwy - if you put in [Anchorage, Alaska](https://www.starbucks.com/store-locator?map=61.354821,-149.551748,9z&place=Anchorage,%20AK,%20USA) it finds a few dozen. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780.md?page=3)