# I pit a Starbucks barista **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 20, 2017, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780 "2017-09-20T02:45:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/41 "2017-09-20T20:40:53Z")
> [@Ravenman](#): > > Or, you need therapy, too. Dude lives in Brooklyn. Of _course_ he needs therapy. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/42 "2017-09-20T21:01:57Z")
I’m okay with servicepeople knowing my name, at least when there’s some other obvious way for them to know it other than stalking me, but when the gal at Domino’s cheerfully called out that she’d be seeing me again tomorrow, _that_ was a bit annoying. And before you say anything, no, I don’t eat pizza daily. Well, not anymore. ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/43 "2017-09-20T21:05:19Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > It’s completely standard for customer service people to be trained to use the customer’s name if they know it for threshold greetings and at the beginning and end of transactions. Yeah, and it shouldn’t be. Because not everybody is comfortable with it, yet these companies FORCE their workers to do it. They should allow their employees the freedom to be “friendly” or not based on their own judgment. If they get a vibe from the customer that they don’t want to be “befriended” they should be allowed to keep it robotic. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/44 "2017-09-20T21:10:16Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > Phaw! I grow my own beans, even have a burro. When it comes time to plant those beans I hope you know your ass from a hole in the ground. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/45 "2017-09-20T21:10:22Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > Phaw! I grow my own beans, even have a burro. I don’t have enough room at my place for a whole burro, so I got a burrito. ---
**Author:** ![aktep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f0a364/32.png) [@aktep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aktep)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/46 "2017-09-20T21:14:10Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > Nah, their website is just screwy - if you put in [Anchorage, Alaska](https://www.starbucks.com/store-locator?map=61.354821,-149.551748,9z&place=Anchorage,%20AK,%20USA) it finds a few dozen. Yeah, very likely, there’s just none within however many hundred miles of the middle of nowhere that gets selected when you search for “Alaska”. And I’m on board with this rant (or I need therapy too). I’ve stopped going places once I’ve become a regular. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/47 "2017-09-20T21:23:44Z")
> [@cuauhtemoc](#): > > Yeah, and it shouldn’t be. Because not everybody is comfortable with it, yet these companies FORCE their workers to do it. They should allow their employees the freedom to be “friendly” or not based on their own judgment. If they get a vibe from the customer that they don’t want to be “befriended” they should be allowed to keep it robotic. You do realize how unviable this is, right? If service people didn’t have to be nice then they’d drive all the customers away the first time they met a rude customer and started shooting up the joint (which is, of course, the natural response to a rude customer). Then the rude servicepeople would be fired, and their replacements would talk in hushed whispers about the guy who didn’t learn all the regulars’ names. ---
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/48 "2017-09-20T21:53:05Z")
Yeah, it’s too late but my solution is to only give my surname, which has a chilling effect on all but the most determinedly chipper. Weird groupthink thing though - everyone that’s expecting to only hear a first name gets it wrong as Brian. It’s happened on occasion all over the Midwest. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/49 "2017-09-20T23:19:35Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > When it comes time to plant those beans I hope you know your ass from a hole in the ground. Sure, you kiss one and plant seeds in the other. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/50 "2017-09-20T23:30:24Z")
> [@epbrown01](#): > > Yeah, it’s too late but my solution is to only give my surname, which has a chilling effect on all but the most determinedly chipper. Weird groupthink thing though - everyone that’s expecting to only hear a first name gets it wrong as Brian. It’s happened on occasion all over the Midwest. A certain famous international spy had the same problem, but he just laid it out clearly: “The name is Bond. James Bond.” I suggest you do the same. I don’t mean the same concept. I mean what you literally say is, “The name is Bond. James Bond.” Once again, that should take care of things. If perchance some serving person finds that cute, ask her out on a date using my previously cited [James Renfield](http://www.fernbyfilms.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Renfield_1931.jpg) persona. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2017, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/51 "2017-09-20T23:58:09Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > You do realize how unviable this is, right? If service people didn’t have to be nice then they’d drive all the customers away the first time they met a rude customer and started shooting up the joint (which is, of course, the natural response to a rude customer). Then the rude servicepeople would be fired, and their replacements would talk in hushed whispers about the guy who didn’t learn all the regulars’ names. I’ve read this like five times and I still have no idea what you’re trying to say. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/52 "2017-09-21T00:10:26Z")
We could always start fake news that your local Starbucks is Hillary Clinton’s secret child sex slave pen and wait for some alt-right whacko to show up with a gun. Maybe that will scare the barrista harpy away. ---
**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/53 "2017-09-21T00:45:06Z")
well you could be known as the dude that always had a kitten up a tree… See one of my cats was about 10 days old when she was found while taking a short cut up an alley and sometimes shed just dart out the door when Id answer it… and since I have delivery fairly often said kitten would blow past me and delivery person and straight up the city’s tree and id stand there for a couple of hours doing the here kitty kitty thing looking like fool… So eventually when I read the address they’d go " oh how’s the kitty ? and some even brought snacks (the cat had a sausage Canadian bacon and pepperoni addiction… thanks dominos …\_) … eventually about 5 years ago thry cut the tree down and a few weeks later cat ran out the door to the tree and her world ended \*it wasn’t there! \* she sniffed and dug and paced and meowed like she was crying … One guy who left the aisan food place joined the army and came back to the job after couldn’t find the house because of well theres no tree there … but when he seen the cat staring out the door he said he knew where he was … and spent a few minutes catching up with my cat … ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/54 "2017-09-21T00:59:20Z")
> [@SeaDragonTattoo](#): > > I love this. I would do the same. Kinda do, it’s just not a different name all the time. I adopted “Veronika” when I was in college and tend to give that name to strangers, whether it’s some jackass in a bar (original reason) or a register person asking my name so it can be yelled into the room a few minutes later. How do they know to yell it with a “k” instead of a “c” (and how good are you at telling the difference)? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/55 "2017-09-21T01:04:19Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > "You go to Starbucks?! I roast and grind my own at home, far better and cheaper " in 3 - 2 - > [@JohnT](#): > > Phaw! I grow my own beans, even have a burro. _pffft_. I weave my own burlap for the bags, AND every summer, I free dive from a cliff in the Yucatan, and catch an octopus. After I have harvested enough ink to put an imprint of me any my burro on the bags, I release the octopus, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Pippers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b5a626/32.png) [@Pippers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pippers)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/56 "2017-09-21T01:25:58Z")
The OP says he goes there for that vacant touch of humanity, so telling him to grind and brew the coffee at home is, well stupid. When she calls out your name, look at her with your eyes squinted shut and give a small head shake “no”. People don’t know what you want if you don’t tell them. Why suffer? I love places that ask for my name. I tell them one that’s long and hard to spell on a cup. Charlotta Maria, Susaranalee, Meredithanor, etc. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/57 "2017-09-21T01:40:25Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > Phaw! I grow my own beans, even have a burro. > [@kaylasdad99](#): > > _pffft_. I weave my own burlap for the bags, AND every summer, I free dive from a cliff in the Yucatan, and catch an octopus. After I have harvested enough ink to put an imprint of me any my burro on the bags, I release the octopus, of course. Can I ask both of you **losers** a question? Where do you get your water? Water is the essence of good coffee! I make my own water and electricity from the same fuel cells that power the coffee maker and the rest of my spaceship. My water comes from pure hydrogen and oxygen. I can take my whole coffee ecosystem and have it work on Mars. I can grow my own custom genetically modified coffee beans on Mars, too – all I need is some of Matt Damon’s shit. And you? You have a burro and some burlap bags. Pathetic. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/58 "2017-09-21T01:42:33Z")
I commune every morning with the Platonic Ideal of a cup of coffee. ---
**Author:** ![Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/channing_idaho_banks/32/250_2.png) [@Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Channing_Idaho_Banks)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/59 "2017-09-21T02:12:30Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > Nah, I understand him completely. > > I choose to live in NYC because, as E.B. White wrote, it “confers the gift of anonymity.” > > I don’t go to coffee shops – I roast and grind my own at home, it’s far better and cheaper! – but the counter guys at my favorite pizzeria know me and greet me (thank god they don’t remember my name) and it always makes me hesitate before I enter. > > Unfortunately, there are too many of them back there to abduct and lock in a cage in my basement. I grind my wheat at home and bake my hand thrown pizzas on a stone made by monks in Italy. I never use tomato sauce. No one greets me by name. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2017, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780/60 "2017-09-21T02:28:17Z")
> [@Channing\_Idaho\_Banks](#): > > I grind my wheat at home and bake my hand thrown pizzas on a stone made by monks in Italy. I never use tomato sauce. No one greets me by name. You _bought_ the stone? Pathetic. I don’t drink coffee therefore I win. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-a-starbucks-barista/796780.md?page=4)