# I pit crying babies in public places **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 25, 2010, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368 "2010-01-25T15:52:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![Fuji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a9a28c/32.png) [@Fuji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuji)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/221 "2010-01-26T18:12:02Z")
> [@Caffeine.addict](#): > > So, being passive agressive is a plus in your book. Frankly, I wouldn’t want to be seated next to either party in that anecdote. One party has a screaming child. The other party is passive agressive and doesn’t use language appropriate for polite company. No, it’s not necessarily a plus. If it gets the job done, though, that’s all that matters. Plus the one using age-inappropriate language is a lot funnier than the jackoff parents. Come on, imagine Larry David as **Alice** ’s friend. Or [Brian Griffin](http://www.whoisthemonkey.com/videos/26family-guy-brian-flips-out-on-baby). ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/222 "2010-01-26T18:12:32Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > So overhearing obscenities is superior to a crying baby? Who’da thunk? I would have preferred to hear the little brat scream his head off than hear an adult that should know better say fuck in public. Nope. We were sitting at the next table, he was speaking to me, his companion, not to the restaurant, and as you said, conversation can clearly be overheard when you’re sitting that close. So the guy was actually eavesdropping on\* us\*. And at 6’5 and 250 lbs., the man does get away with saying things that other people only dare to think. It comes in handy, sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/223 "2010-01-26T18:19:09Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > And yet the argument has gone five pages here in two days, and this is far from the first time we’ve had this discussion. I don’t quite get it. This will go on for at least three more pages. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/224 "2010-01-26T18:27:28Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > This will go on for at least three more pages. And god forbid if \*\*curlcoat \*\*should find her way in. ---
**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/225 "2010-01-26T18:28:03Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > And god forbid if \*\*curlcoat \*\*should find her way in. OK - you have said the name once. For the love of God don’t say it twice more. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/226 "2010-01-26T18:35:16Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > And god forbid if \*\*curlcoat \*\*should find her way in. She’s posted in the thread already. ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/227 "2010-01-26T18:38:55Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Nope. We were sitting at the next table, he was speaking to me, his companion, not to the restaurant, and as you said, conversation can clearly be overheard when you’re sitting that close. So the guy was actually eavesdropping on\* us\*. And at 6’5 and 250 lbs., the man does get away with saying things that other people only dare to think. It comes in handy, sometimes. Oh bullshit. Once again, let’s see what you wrote earlier (post #119): > [@](#): > > My friend’s way of handling the screaming newborn-having parents behind us **was to look directly at them periodically** and say to me, “I wish someone would shut that fucking baby up.” It’s clear that the intent was to make sure the people heard the comment. Btw, 6’5, 250lbs and getting away with saying things other people only dare to think sounds like a big jackass to me. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/228 "2010-01-26T18:40:43Z")
One of the advantages to being big, I’d think. ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/229 "2010-01-26T18:40:55Z")
And your point is… ? He looked at them, yes- his remark was part of a private conversation between the two of us. If it was overheard, well, the baby screaming was overheard, as well. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/230 "2010-01-26T18:48:57Z")
Homer: I know you can read my thoughts, boy… _meow-meow-meow-meow meow-meow-meow-meow meow-meow-meow-meow meow-meow-meow-meow_ ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/231 "2010-01-26T18:49:29Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > And your point is… ? He looked at them, yes- his remark was part of a private conversation between the two of us. If it was overheard, well, the baby screaming was overheard, as well. Are you being intentionally obtuse? Why did he look at them? I can’t wait to hear your answer, but my answer is intimidation. Most people when faced with a 6’5 250lb goon are going to be intimidated when they already know there’s a problem. At this point you’re just making excuses for your friend’s bad behavior. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/232 "2010-01-26T18:49:46Z")
A BIGGGGG jackass. Sometimes the big fellas have a responsibility to say what the rest of us can only think. ---
**Author:** ![tacoloco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tacoloco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tacoloco)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/233 "2010-01-26T18:51:00Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > One of the advantages to being big, I’d think. No doubt. Now get off my couch. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/234 "2010-01-26T18:57:14Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > ZPG, when some of us say that a parent should take a misbehaving child outside, I’m pretty confident in saying that we don’t mean take the child outside and prostitute her. Oh dear. I may have rethink my entire approach to discipline. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/235 "2010-01-26T19:25:42Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Nope. We were sitting at the next table, he was speaking to me, his companion, not to the restaurant, and as you said, conversation can clearly be overheard when you’re sitting that close. So the guy was actually eavesdropping on\* us\*. And at 6’5 and 250 lbs., the man does get away with saying things that other people only dare to think. It comes in handy, sometimes. Thanks for proving my point. Babies that can disturb other diners and obscenities that can disturb other diners are both rude. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/236 "2010-01-26T19:33:20Z")
> [@otternell](#): > > Sorry but I am going to be the disagreeable asshole here. You took a freaking 4 month old who can’t even apprecaite the movie, to Avatar, and “we took him out after he cried for 5 minutes - 4 times”. You are the jerk of all jerks and now I pit you. > > ETA: unless I am being whooshed. Not to mention, no way in HELL is it the waitperson’s job to watch your kid for even a minute, even for an extra 50 cents or whatever that extra 2-3 percent is. My vote is a) you’re an ass, and/or b) you’re whooshing us. ( **Rhythmdvl** , not **otternell** that is!) ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/237 "2010-01-26T19:44:06Z")
> [@PoorYorick](#): > > I know you’re being facetious, but I’d like to take your question seriously for a sec because I know a lot of people who ask this question for real: Yes, I know you’re going crazy with a whimpering, crying, drooling, leaking personification of neediness. But, yeah, that pretty much means that restaurants and movies are off-limits, either until you can get a baby sitter or until the little darling gets some social consciousness. Your needs and wants take a back seat right now. Well… as the parent of 2 kids who went to restaurants with us fairly often from a fairly young age: Yes… but that does NOT mean you can’t go to restaurants. What it _does_ mean is: [ul] [li]You choose the sorts of restaurants you go to (noisy family-style places good, fancy places bad)[/li][li]You bring plenty of entertainment for the youngster (we kept a bagful of small toys in the car to bring with us for occasions like this[/li][li]You don’t do it alone (i.e. always do it with 2 adults)[/li][li]You put managing the child’s behavior as top priority, over enjoying your own meal.[/li][li]You distract baby the minute his dissatisfaction becomes at all vocal.[/li][li]You take baby out of the restaurant IMMEDIATELY if the child gets too noisy (there were many meals where one of us walked outside with the kid while the other one ate, then we switched duties… for a full year with Dweezil, we could not eat together at restaurants).[/li][li]Relax and enjoy dessert? Hahahahahahahahaha!!![/li][li]Tip very very well. At the VERY least, chances are the poor wait staff will have to clean Cheerios up from the carpet. [/li][/ul] If you’re not prepared to do all of the above, then get a sitter or call out for pizza. It’s not fair to the other diners, or the restaurant staff, or yourself really, unless you’re the sort of ass who can enjoy a meal while ignoring Baby screaming the place down. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/238 "2010-01-26T19:50:07Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Sorry, **Malthus** , you’re right. Most of your previous posts were such poorly thought-out drivel that I started skimming, assuming more of the same. My apologies for failing to noticie that you finally conceded that you actually agree with everyone else here and were apparently just being contrary for the sake of being contrary. Heh, I guess this one gets preserved in the hall of fame under the title “graceful”. 😃 PS: read my post #23 - well before you chose to grace us with your cogent remarks. See also post 43, post 166, etc. etc. I guess it is no surprise that you have failed, again, to notice that I was disagreeing not with the reasonable position I’d adopted before you even appeared, but with your _un_reasonable position concerning excluding the kids. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/239 "2010-01-26T19:57:34Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Post 55, yo. 48 and 51 also work for examples of people not supporting a No Children Anywhere rule. I think most of the responses here have been reasonable. As do I. Note I took no issue with those posts - because I agreed with them, basically. I only took issue with those posts I _disagreed_ with, which I found unreasonable - mainly those whose opinions were that kids should not be out in public _at all_, until they are perfectly able to behave. And there have been some. It does not help that some here seemingly cannot grasp that, for the most part, we are not disagreeing on the essentials - see the **Shot from Guns** idiocy as an example. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2010, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/240 "2010-01-26T21:41:03Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > My vote is a) you’re an ass, and/or b) you’re whooshing us. ( **Rhythmdvl** , not **otternell** that is!) Should have kept reading. The whole post was facetious, as the thread went on to point out and be amused by. > [@Malthus](#): > > I guess it is no surprise that you have failed, again, to notice that I was disagreeing not with the reasonable position I’d adopted before you even appeared, but with your _un_reasonable position concerning excluding the kids. My position is perfectly reasonable. The only **un** reasonable position is your made-out-of-whole-cloth strawman misapprehension of what I’ve said. 1.) When children misbehave in public in such a way to cause a disturbance, their parents should (a) make attempts to quiet them and/or (b) remove them. 2.) Parents should not bring their children into public areas where they might cause a disturbance until they have reasonable cause to believe that their child is capable of behaving. What constitutes “reasonable cause” will obviously be left to the parent to decide. The main point is, if your kid can’t behave when they’re eating dinner at home, they shouldn’t be brought to a restaurant. If your child is large enough to get up and run around on their own, but not yet mature enough to understand that a restaurant is not a place to play tag (or to listen when you tell them to get back in their seat), then you shouldn’t be bringing them out yet, because the night will indubitably end badly. 3.) However, if your child is at least theoretically capable of not being a nuisance to you and any other patrons of the restaurant, theater, etc., you are perfectly welcome to bring them out with you, provided you keep a firm grasp on #1. If you’re going to contend that I’m being unreasonable here, I might as well criticize your hatred of Jews, since there’s exactly as much evidence. So, why are you such a Nazi? If you love Hitler so much, why don’t you marry him? Huh? Huh? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368.md?page=13)