# I pit crying babies in public places **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 25, 2010, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368 "2010-01-25T15:52:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/21 "2010-01-25T17:31:35Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > Strangle it. After all, if you’re put into a small room with a crying child, you could–conceivably–go insane, and then it would just be a case of self defense. You know, your destiny is that at least one person out there will take this post seriously. Just sayin’. And yes, parents should remove their crying infants from places of business until said situation is under control. I thought that was just common sense. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/22 "2010-01-25T17:41:34Z")
> [@sandra\_nz](#): > > I really don’t get manager’s giving the helpless ‘What can I do?’ line. Here’s what you can do, you can ask the table with the baby to leave if they can’t quieten the child after a reasonable period of time. > > However… > You say this like it’s an easy thing to do. It isn’t. Sometimes a baby just wants to cry/a kid wants to kick up a fuss and nothing in the world is going to stop them. You should pit the parents for not leaving the restaurant, but not for being unable to quieten the baby/kid. I specifically said: > [@](#): > > Either shove a bottle in its mouth or take it out of the room. Period. They did neither. ETA…I notice that someone posted this earlier. Sorry about that. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/23 "2010-01-25T17:43:26Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > You know, your destiny is that at least one person out there will take this post seriously. Just sayin’. > And yes, parents should remove their crying infants from places of business until said situation is under control. I thought that was just common sense. Generally, I’d agree. It is certainly what I would do, if possible. However, there may be situations where it is not that easy. In the middle of winter here in Toronto, taking a kid outside may not be the best solution. As always, it is a question of reasonable accomodation. Is the parent making an effort to reasonably accomodate others? If so, I’d give them the benefit of the doubt. If not, they are behaving rudely. And naturally, some venues children should not be invited to. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/24 "2010-01-25T17:46:55Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > You know, your destiny is that at least one person out there will take this post seriously. Just sayin’. [There’s already someone on this very boards who’s advocated this position!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=11957536&postcount=26) > [@Of Infanticide and Abortion](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/of-infanticide-and-abortion/523695/26): > > If the tot’s screaming and crying were damaging your mental health, you would probably have a good case that it was necessary throttle the tot. Also, if you believed your own life was in danger by the tot’s presence or that’s the tot’s death might facilitate your escape, you could probably get away with it. ---
**Author:** ![Auntbeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Auntbeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Auntbeast)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/25 "2010-01-25T17:47:26Z")
Our childrens menus state “Good kids get a free balloon.” I’ve amended it in my world to “bad kids get one quicker.” If I hear a kid start to get fussy, I run over, ask the parents if they can have a balloon, then haul butt to get one. I don’t care whose section the child is in, if I can hear it, so can MY section. Balloons are baby crack. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/26 "2010-01-25T17:48:25Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > I’m not sure that its a bad business decision for the majority of restaurants to favor the people with kids. > > Eventually, the people with babies come back with teenage boys. Upset the childless couple and you are out two people. Start dissing families and you are out a table for six. > > The parents in question are bores, I’ve eaten more than one restaurant meal out of a stryrofoam box when my kids couldn’t handle dinner. But I’m not sure that the restuarant in question is making a poor decision…depending on the restuarant. Obviously, a high end restaurant that caters to romantic meals and adults should probably ask the people with the crying baby to leave. But Outback Steakhouse…I’m thinking its in there best interest to let people with crying baby stay. It isn’t. Start dissing families and you are out a table for six…in what, 10 years from now? They lost a table of three (us), a table of two and a table of four last night, which is money lost now. We eat there regularly because it’s convenient, probably 2-3 times a month. Now they’ve lost that business as well, just so they’ll have a family of six, ten years from now? Not a good business decision from any point of view. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/27 "2010-01-25T17:53:26Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > It isn’t. Start dissing families and you are out a table for six…in what, 10 years from now? They lost a table of three (us), a table of two and a table of four last night, which is money lost now. > > We eat there regularly because it’s convenient, probably 2-3 times a month. Now they’ve lost that business as well, just so they’ll have a family of six, ten years from now? Not a good business decision from any point of view. Depends on the type of restaurant. Many do a good business being “family friendly”. It is the fact of being “family friendly” that attracts, not the specific family years down the road. The sort of places that have a special kid’s menu, hand out crayons to kids as they are seated, etc. High-end romantic meal type places, obviously, not so much. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/28 "2010-01-25T18:08:07Z")
First time parent of a four-month-old here, and I take these rants to heart. We’re just learning the etiquette ropes about what is/is not acceptable behavior with the dude, but do try our best. For example, we went to Avatar on opening night and were quite courteous – one of us got up to take him to the lobby each time he started crying (it was only four times) within five minutes of being sure it wasn’t just fussing but full on crying. It didn’t bother us at all to carry him out and shush him, even though we were sitting in the middle of a row and it was hard for us to get out. He’s really well behaved, which may be an anomaly as far as kids/parents in a restaurant goes. Pretty much the only time he starts crying is when we leave him at the table to go to the salad bar or something, but then he’s not alone for long. We usually ask the waiter or waitress to keep an eye on him, so really it’s their job to keep him occupied and quiet. (Oh, and don’t worry, we usually bump the tip up to 17 or 18 percent for this service, it’s not like we expect it of them!) ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/29 "2010-01-25T18:08:17Z")
Bit of a hijack, but the screaming baby thing seems to have a predilection for wedding ceremonies, when everyone’s on the alter and things are otherwise dead quiet in the place. I figure that the bride and groom have one (well, maybe three) chances in a lifetime to get married and be the focus of attention, and to form a memory they’ll share til they drop. So, the hysterical kid is just a tad out of place. ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/30 "2010-01-25T18:10:07Z")
> [@Rhythmdvl](#): > > First time parent of a four-month-old here, and I take these rants to heart. We’re just learning the etiquette ropes about what is/is not acceptable behavior with the dude, but do try our best. For example, we went to Avatar on opening night and were quite courteous – one of us got up to take him to the lobby each time he started crying (it was only four times) within five minutes of being sure it wasn’t just fussing but full on crying. It didn’t bother us at all to carry him out and shush him, even though we were sitting in the middle of a row and it was hard for us to get out. > > He’s really well behaved, which may be an anomaly as far as kids/parents in a restaurant goes. Pretty much the only time he starts crying is when we leave him at the table to go to the salad bar or something, but then he’s not alone for long. We usually ask the waiter or waitress to keep an eye on him, so really it’s their job to keep him occupied and quiet. (Oh, and don’t worry, we usually bump the tip up to 17 or 18 percent for this service, it’s not like we expect it of them!) Sorry but I am going to be the disagreeable asshole here. You took a freaking 4 month old who can’t even apprecaite the movie, to Avatar, and “we took him out after he cried for 5 minutes - 4 times”. You are the jerk of all jerks and now I pit you. ETA: unless I am being whooshed. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/31 "2010-01-25T18:16:41Z")
> [@Rhythmdvl](#): > > We usually ask the waiter or waitress to keep an eye on him, so really it’s their job to keep him occupied and quiet. (Oh, and don’t worry, we usually bump the tip up to 17 or 18 percent for this service, it’s not like we expect it of them!) Did I just read this??? You’re kidding, right??? It’s the responsibility of the waitstaff to take care of your crying baby and they get a **17%** tip for the pleasure of doing this??? This is a woosh, right? No one is actually this stunned and self important, right?? Well done - you got me!! I thought you were serious for a second there. Obviously, you’re not, because no one in the universe could possible be this stupid. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/32 "2010-01-25T18:18:47Z")
**otternel** and **alice\_in\_wonderland** , i think that post was tongue in cheek. At least, i hope it was. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/33 "2010-01-25T18:18:49Z")
> [@otternell](#): > > You took a freaking 4 month old who can’t even apprecaite the movie He’s a very _smart_ 4 month old. (Actually, it seems I was validating **faithfool**.) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/34 "2010-01-25T18:20:42Z")
I had only read the 1st paragraph when I posted. When I saw the second, I was pretty sure I had been had. Good job **Rhythmdvl**! ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/35 "2010-01-25T18:25:09Z")
> [@Rhythmdvl](#): > > He’s a very _smart_ 4 month old. > > (Actually, it seems I was validating **faithfool**.) > > 😃 BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Well done! You totally got me! ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/36 "2010-01-25T18:28:29Z")
> [@Malthus](#): > > Depends on the type of restaurant. Many do a good business being “family friendly”. It is the fact of being “family friendly” that attracts, not the specific family years down the road. The sort of places that have a special kid’s menu, hand out crayons to kids as they are seated, etc. > > High-end romantic meal type places, obviously, not so much. Yep, that’s pretty much what I’m saying. If you are in a high end romantic restaurant, I’d expect the manager to ask the people with the baby to leave (or not seat them to start with). Anyone who takes a baby to trendy bar/cafe should be asked to leave. Those are places where the majority of the clientele is NOT interested in having a family in the restaurant, or bringing their own family to the restaurant. TGI Fridays, Olive Garden, Outback Steakhouse, Dead Lobster, Perkins, and local restaurants like that (handing out crayons is a pretty good sign)…those places make their bread and butter off families. ---
**Author:** ![Turek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/turek/32/18782_2.png) [@Turek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turek)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/37 "2010-01-25T18:34:13Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > Well done - you got me!! I thought you were serious for a second there. Obviously, you’re not, because no one in the universe could possible be this stupid. They COULD be, if all the blood had rushed to their uterus 4 months ago and now they’re all hopped up on baby smell. 😃 Personally, I love babies. It’s just that I can never finish a whole one by myself. ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/38 "2010-01-25T18:36:04Z")
I started a [poll](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=549380) asking if people would go to a restaurant if it was childfree, around the same price range of Applebees / Chili’s etc. I am wondering if there would be sufficient business to keep it open? Its a fun idea, but I am afraid **Dangerosa** may be right that those customers are the bread and butter of the business. ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/39 "2010-01-25T18:38:47Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Okay, so what should parents with children do? Not be allowed to go to restaurants? I know you’re being facetious, but I’d like to take your question seriously for a sec because I know a lot of people who ask this question for real: Yes, I know you’re going crazy with a whimpering, crying, drooling, leaking personification of neediness. But, yeah, that pretty much means that restaurants and movies are off-limits, either until you can get a baby sitter or until the little darling gets some social consciousness. Your needs and wants take a back seat right now. ---
**Author:** ![LurkerInNJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ed655f/32.png) [@LurkerInNJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkerInNJ)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2010, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/40 "2010-01-25T18:39:15Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > Obviously, a high end restaurant that caters to romantic meals and adults should probably ask the people with the crying baby to leave. But Outback Steakhouse…I’m thinking its in there best interest to let people with crying baby stay. Back in the day, it wasn’t a management decision. It used to be that if your baby or child was making a fuss or misbehaving in a way that would disturb other diners, the child would be removed from the restaurant by a parent until they quieted down. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368.md?page=3)