# I pit crying babies in public places **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 25, 2010, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368 "2010-01-25T15:52:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 26
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2010, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/501 "2010-02-02T20:06:12Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > If a dead rapist shits in the woods, does that make him Catholic? Only if no one’s around to hear him shitting. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2010, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/502 "2010-02-02T21:00:13Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Only if no one’s around to hear him shitting. It would also depend on whether the bear was husky man taking it up the ass, as some bears tend to be. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2010, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/503 "2010-02-02T21:41:02Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > If a dead rapist shits in the woods, does that make him Catholic? Do bears wear funny hats? ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2010, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/504 "2010-02-02T22:24:49Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Personally, I’m curious as to exactly what kind of screaming \*\*YogSosoth \*\*did at the baby. Was it a mock-baby scream? “Waaaaaaah! Waaaaaah!” Or was it a full-on adult scream? “AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE!” Or more of a manly yell? “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRGH!” And how loud was it? I started with “Shut up” and repeated that a few times, getting louder each time. Then I extended the “up” into an “aaaaaaaaaaaah” and just kept that up for a few seconds. It wasn’t ear-splitting loud (like the kid was doing), it was more like how loud you would yell at a sports game ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2010, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/505 "2010-02-02T23:00:24Z")
Lucky you were not arrested. ---
**Author:** ![Fuji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a9a28c/32.png) [@Fuji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuji)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2010, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/506 "2010-02-02T23:02:19Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > I mentioned nothing about cannibalism. All I said was my baby would get his food first, then me mine, then someone else would get whatever was left over and I’d even consider stealing that if my baby needed it. Fuji (I think it was) flipped out and made himself look stupid by misreading what I wrote (something he did several times) and then bringing up the “survival cannibalism” deal that no one ever mentioned. After that, everyone ran with the cannibalism thing like it was the Olympic Torch. Then why bring up the deserted island in the first place? [You](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12042919&postcount=252) were the one who said: “_If I was stranded with you and my kid on a deserted island and I was in charge, my kid would get his food first, I’d get mine, and you’d get whatever (if any) was left. And if I had to steal yours so he could survive I’d do it in a second._”. I submit that survival cannibalism is not an unlikely development in a scenario where you’d kill me (i.e. through starvation) for food on a deserted island. I notice you’ve also posted several times to this thread in “I’m such a cheeky bastard” fashion without ever explaining your bizarre “Let the wait staff deal with it” comment, you weasely shitsack. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2010, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/507 "2010-02-02T23:08:35Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > Lucky you were not arrested. Probably. I’d like to think the wait staff was sick of the kid too. Whatever it was, destiny guided me to yell at that baby. ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/508 "2010-02-03T00:40:15Z")
> [@Fuji](#): > > I notice you’ve also posted several times to this thread in “I’m such a cheeky bastard” fashion without ever explaining your bizarre “Let the wait staff deal with it” comment, you weasely shitsack. It was a joke, you humorless fuck. Pardon me for forgetting the all important smiley face that you can’t understand a posting without! Let me explain: 1. I try to quiet my baby because I care about him and not you 2. You don’t care about me so you start yelling at me 3. We go nowhere because we both don’t care about each other and are both yelling (unstoppable force…immovable object…) 4. As a joke (notice how “let the wait staff deal with it” has been jokingly repeated in this thread a couple times already) I throw my hands up in frustation and leave it up to the staff (not what I would do in real life, just something I said in this thread). For someone who “reads just fine” you seem to have some really shitty comprehension skills. Let the wait staff deal with it. :);):);):);):)😉 Get it now? \*“If I was stranded with you and my kid on a deserted island and I was in charge, my kid would get his food first, I’d get mine, and you’d get whatever (if any) was left. And if I had to steal yours so he could survive I’d do it in a second.”. \* That was meant to show that I care about my kid more than I care about you! You’re really goddamn thick. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/509 "2010-02-03T01:30:57Z")
So the baby was hanging by a thread after being tossed out a window by a frustrated patron. The thread broke and the baby fell onto the train tracks below. Along came a train, and the baby was turned to pablum. The squikiness caused a train wreck. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/510 "2010-02-03T02:51:10Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > So the baby was hanging by a thread after being tossed out a window by a frustrated patron. The thread broke and the baby fell onto the train tracks below. Along came a train, and the baby was turned to pablum. The squikiness caused a train wreck. After finishing his shit, the dead rapist wanders down to the tracks and… ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/511 "2010-02-03T03:09:17Z")
> [@curlcoat](#): > > After finishing his shit, the dead rapist wanders down to the tracks and… Comes to a burning house next to a Chili’s with no crayons. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/512 "2010-02-03T13:46:12Z")
Good grief. How much longer until we start posting dead baby jokes? ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/513 "2010-02-03T14:46:34Z")
You’re lagging behind. It was implicit that the dead rapist is a baby. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/514 "2010-02-03T17:27:42Z")
We’re never going to make 12 pages at this rate. Come on people! Cough up some indignation! You can do it! ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/515 "2010-02-03T19:03:29Z")
Indignation? Well, here goes. A young girl chanted her even younger brother’s name while pulling at this crotch: \* > [@](#): > > Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank), Timmy, Timmy, Timmy, (yank, yank, yank) . . . - Except for when the sister was asleep, this went on for a couple of days on a long train ride that started in northern Manitoba. We fellow passengers begged her to stop, but she wouldn’t. I think that she couldn’t. Child from hell. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/516 "2010-02-03T19:24:29Z")
I certainly hope somebody stepped up to scream in her face, otherwise you just have yourself to blame. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2010, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/517 "2010-02-03T19:48:38Z")
Was either child dead, shitting, and/or a rapist? Did either appear to be Catholic or a bear? Who was wearing the funny hat? Did anybody get bludgeoned with a coffee mug? Details, man, we need the details. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2010, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/518 "2010-02-04T06:28:00Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > Indignation? Well, here goes. > > A young girl chanted her even younger brother’s name while pulling at this crotch\ I think we’re going to need some more explanation on this one. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2010, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/519 "2010-02-04T15:56:01Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > Lucky you were not arrested. This is what makes me not take you people who’re freaking out about Yog seriously. You really think people get arrested for shouting? Once? Even at a baby in a restaurant? > [@Clothahump](#): > > Good grief. How much longer until we start posting dead baby jokes? How do you get a dozen dead babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Nachos. ---
**Author:** ![irae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f0a364/32.png) [@irae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irae)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368/520 "2010-02-04T16:36:44Z")
> [@otternell](#): > > How many posts will it take for someone to say “you were that age too, once”, or otherwise take the screaming baby/wishy-washy parent’s side? Clotha sprung fully-formed from a teabag. True story. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368.md?page=25) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-crying-babies-in-public-places/526368.md?page=27)