# I pit John **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 26, 2014, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215 "2014-12-26T15:52:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Sigene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df788c/32.png) [@Sigene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigene)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/1 "2014-12-26T15:52:40Z")
I’ve never started or participated in a Pit thread, but this is the one. John was dear to a close relation to mine and that is the only good thing I’ll say. John was an asshole through and through. I just read your will John. Where you disowned your first son because he didn’t stand up to his mother. You called him a ‘wimp’ and deserving of nothing. You disowned your second son because he married someone who was not the nationality you prefer. While you say she is not ever allowed on your property, you are dead now and I hope she and others like her will piss on your flagpole and shit in your garden. You also disowned your two daughters, one for having a child out of wedlock and for being estranged from you. She’s better for it. I can’t imagine how hard it was for her to deal with you on a daily basis. She doesn’t want your shit anyway. It should have been telling to you that she prefers not having a relationship with you. All your money and property isn’t valuable enough for her. You’re dead. No one wants to love you enough to put up with your crap. The irony is lost on you that you disown one for respecting his mothers wishes, but trash your others for standing up to you. Your politics were wrong, and I’m glad they died with you. I had to hold my tongue because I didn’t want to create problems with the one I love. But you were mean, spiteful, vindictive and and nothing but asshole. You almost make me want to be religious so I can know that you are rotting in hell. If I ever have the opportunity, I’m going to sell your property to a bunch of Chinese developers for low income housing. They’ll make a lot of money off of your beloved land and the people you despise will raise families there. I strike your name from history, and your legacy is your death ---
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/2 "2014-12-26T16:13:25Z")
I’m not entirely sure what to do here. John _does_ sound like he was a grade-A asshole, though. Looks like he wound up alone and unloved. Self-fulfilling karma? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/3 "2014-12-26T17:43:52Z")
> [@Sigene](#): > > I’ve never started or participated in a Pit thread, but this is the one. > John was dear to a close relation to mine and that is the only good thing I’ll say. > > John was an asshole through and through. I just read your will John. Where you disowned your first son because he didn’t stand up to his mother. You called him a ‘wimp’ and deserving of nothing. > You disowned your second son because he married someone who was not the nationality you prefer. While you say she is not ever allowed on your property, you are dead now and I hope she and others like her will piss on your flagpole and shit in your garden. > > You also disowned your two daughters, one for having a child out of wedlock and for being estranged from you. She’s better for it. I can’t imagine how hard it was for her to deal with you on a daily basis. She doesn’t want your shit anyway. It should have been telling to you that she prefers not having a relationship with you. All your money and property isn’t valuable enough for her. You’re dead. No one wants to love you enough to put up with your crap. > The irony is lost on you that you disown one for respecting his mothers wishes, but trash your others for standing up to you. > > Your politics were wrong, and I’m glad they died with you. I had to hold my tongue because I didn’t want to create problems with the one I love. But you were mean, spiteful, vindictive and and nothing but asshole. > > You almost make me want to be religious so I can know that you are rotting in hell. > > If I ever have the opportunity, I’m going to sell your property to a bunch of Chinese developers for low income housing. They’ll make a lot of money off of your beloved land and the people you despise will raise families there. > > **I strike your name from history,** and your legacy is your death Uhh, my sister’s kid is going to be delivering a son in March, and she was kinda planning to name him John. She still can, right? ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/4 "2014-12-26T18:09:57Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Uhh, my sister’s kid is going to be delivering a son in March, and she was kinda planning to name him John. > > She still can, right? What!?! She’s naming him after rotten [John Lackland](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John,_King_of_England)!?! No! That cannot stand! Have her give the child a proper name. Like [**Thingfrith**](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thingfrith). Now there is good, solid Anglo-Saxon name for you. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/5 "2014-12-26T18:21:19Z")
> [@Sigene](#): > > I’ve never started or participated in a Pit thread, but this is the one. > John was dear to a close relation to mine and that is the only good thing I’ll say. > > John was an asshole through and through. I just read your will John. Where you disowned your first son because he didn’t stand up to his mother. You called him a ‘wimp’ and deserving of nothing. > You disowned your second son because he married someone who was not the nationality you prefer. While you say she is not ever allowed on your property, you are dead now and I hope she and others like her will piss on your flagpole and shit in your garden. > > You also disowned your two daughters, one for having a child out of wedlock and for being estranged from you. She’s better for it. I can’t imagine how hard it was for her to deal with you on a daily basis. She doesn’t want your shit anyway. It should have been telling to you that she prefers not having a relationship with you. All your money and property isn’t valuable enough for her. You’re dead. No one wants to love you enough to put up with your crap. > The irony is lost on you that you disown one for respecting his mothers wishes, but trash your others for standing up to you. > > Your politics were wrong, and I’m glad they died with you. I had to hold my tongue because I didn’t want to create problems with the one I love. But you were mean, spiteful, vindictive and and nothing but asshole. > > You almost make me want to be religious so I can know that you are rotting in hell. > > If I ever have the opportunity, I’m going to sell your property to a bunch of Chinese developers for low income housing. They’ll make a lot of money off of your beloved land and the people you despise will raise families there. > > I strike your name from history, and your legacy is your death Are we related? Sounds a lot like my brother in law. After dinner yesterday, our friend asked if I ever hear from him (my sister died last year). I burst out laughing, as the thought of him ever contacting me for any reason whatsoever is just about as bizarre a notion as I can think of. That the man would want to commiserate with me about the wife he treated like shit for over 50 years is tantamount to expecting the second coming. Not to mention that I’m one o’ them liberals who consorts with spics and niggers and the like. How someone gets that hateful in life is a mystery to me. ---
**Author:** ![Sigene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df788c/32.png) [@Sigene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigene)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/6 "2014-12-26T18:21:33Z")
piece of shit fucking asshole I’ll never talk with pride about knowing you, and will always remember and talk about how much of a dick and poor excuse for a human you were. ---
**Author:** ![CheshireKat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheshirekat/32/1207_2.png) [@CheshireKat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CheshireKat)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/7 "2014-12-26T19:00:38Z")
Rant and rave about John for awhile, then let it go. The best revenge will be to **forget** him, and to not let him ever affect you emotionally again, the asshole. ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/8 "2014-12-26T19:03:51Z")
Is there any chance that whomever did inherit the property will split it equitably, instead of letting the unequal distribution stand? For whatever it’s worth, my family did this when my grandmother passed; she had cut a couple kids out for what my parents considered insufficient reason, so they divided the estate. ---
**Author:** ![Sigene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df788c/32.png) [@Sigene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigene)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/9 "2014-12-26T19:06:44Z")
I may do that, but I also see myself returning to this thread occasionally over the next several years, just to curse him. I’m fortunate in that he seemed to like me, and doubly fortunate that he wasn’t a large part of my life. I’ll go to the funeral for support of my loved ones, but if I could piss on his grave I would. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/10 "2014-12-26T19:55:55Z")
Ok, but was he kind to dogs? ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/11 "2014-12-26T19:56:24Z")
You know, you can give each person $14,000 tax free as a Personal Gift, right? And you can do this every year? Sell the property, share the money with those who were disinherited. And smile as big as you can as you hand them the checks, figuratively pissing on his hate. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/12 "2014-12-26T20:28:00Z")
> [@Sigene](#): > > I may do that, but I also see myself returning to this thread occasionally over the next several years, just to curse him. > > I’m fortunate in that he seemed to like me, and doubly fortunate that he wasn’t a large part of my life. > > I’ll go to the funeral for support of my loved ones, but if I could piss on his grave I would. Well, I suggest that you wait until the gravediggers have filled in the hole first. But that’s up to you. ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2014, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/13 "2014-12-26T20:28:49Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > You know, you can give each person $14,000 tax free as a Personal Gift, right? And you can do this every year? > > Sell the property, share the money with those who were disinherited. > > And smile as big as you can as you hand them the checks, figuratively pissing on his hate. There is even more flexibility than that: both spouses can gift both spouses of another couple, for example. Alternatively, their is a lifetime gift cap that is significantly higher. Even if the annual gift exceeds the maximum, you don’t have to pay taxes on it if the life time cap is never reached (obviously, consult with a tax attorney!) ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/14 "2014-12-27T00:47:48Z")
I’m cut to the core. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/15 "2014-12-27T03:25:19Z")
Is there a lot of unclaimed stuff sittin’ in a house somewhere? Got an address? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/16 "2014-12-27T17:48:28Z")
This is the closest I’ve come in 14 years to being Pitted. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/17 "2014-12-27T18:41:21Z")
> [@Sigene](#): > > I’ll go to the funeral for support of my loved ones, but if I could piss on his grave I would. Well, wouldn’t you be justified if you did? You said he was religious. John 3:16… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2014, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/18 "2014-12-27T19:48:56Z")
> [@Sigene](#): > > … you are dead now and I hope she and others like her will piss on your flagpole and shit in your garden… > [@Sigene](#): > > … will always remember and talk about how much of a dick and poor excuse for a human you were. > [@Sigene](#): > > … but if I could piss on his grave I would. Now, that is what I call eurologizing, fine job. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/19 "2014-12-28T13:51:28Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > Now, that is what I call eurologizing, fine job. And apparently, you coined that term. I assumed it had to come from somewhere. Not even spelling it “urologizing” gets more than a handful of hits of people just misspelling eulogizing. It’s a perfect term for pissing on the dead. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2014, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215/20 "2014-12-28T14:42:30Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Ok, but was he kind to dogs? He probably declawed them. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-john/708215.md?page=2)