# I Pit Magiver **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 13, 2021, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851 "2021-03-13T21:55:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 23
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2026, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/441 "2026-07-06T02:49:51Z")
Ha, didn’t see it, I have him on ignore. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/442 "2026-08-20T04:26:10Z")
All I know is if they find a parachute [downriver](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-2026-the-drying-up-of-the-danube-river-exposes-all-kinds-of-unusual-artifacts/1032415/24) we might owe someone a big apology! Then again, maybe not… > [@Euronews article](#): > > However, the mere fact that the motorcycle was found together with the two dead men does not prove that the soldiers were actually travelling on it. > > Several scenarios are conceivable: the two men may have ridden the motorcycle themselves, one as the driver and the other as passenger. It is equally possible that the DKW belonged to one unit, while the two soldiers came from a different context. The motorcycle might also have reached the site only after the men’s deaths. The machine could have ended up in the Danube during the fighting, or been deliberately sunk there later. [Euronews article](https://www.euronews.com/culture/2026/08/12/remains-of-two-wehrmacht-soldiers-found-in-danube-one-served-in-waffen-ss) ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/443 "2026-08-20T13:51:34Z")
I don’t know where you intended to put that but this is clearly the wrong thread. That’s not the guest of dishonor there. ---
**Author:** ![RitterSport](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rittersport/32/6326_2.png) [@RitterSport](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RitterSport)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/444 "2026-08-20T14:02:32Z")
Some time ago, the guest of dishonor suggested parachuting in fighters on motorcycles to solve some kind of war problem. ---
**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/445 "2026-08-20T14:04:46Z")
Benghazi, if I’m not mistaken. The whole problem could apparently have been avoided by just parachuting some motorcyclist commandoes. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Mouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mighty_mouse/32/7776_2.png) [@Mighty\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Mouse)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/446 "2026-08-20T14:08:38Z")
I had always assumed that thus was some kind of exaggerated parody of what he said. Was there also some kind of monkey king fu thing? Like for real? ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/447 "2026-08-20T14:25:04Z")
> [@RitterSport](#): > > Some time ago, the guest of dishonor suggested parachuting in fighters on motorcycles to solve some kind of war problem. Magiver says a lot of dumb stuff, but motorbike ops are a real thing that the Rangers trained. Not via parachute, because parachuting a motorcycle is dumb, but out the back of a cargo plane. One of Rangers’ specialties is seizing airfields and preparing them for follow-on forces. Airfields are really big, so a fast way to get things done is land a C-130 with a squad of bike-mounted infantry who could zoom out the back and very quickly get the airfield marked and cleared of obstacles, and then secure key parts of the facility like control towers and ingress/egress. I’m not clear if this method has actually been employed in airfield seizures, but the capability was certainly trained and rehearsed. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/448 "2026-08-20T14:36:27Z")
> [@RitterSport](#): > > Some time ago, the guest of dishonor suggested parachuting in fighters on motorcycles to solve some kind of war problem. Thanks. Post looked like a misguided pitting of **markn\_1** without that detail. Both have an “M” icon, y’know. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/449 "2026-08-20T14:42:36Z")
> [@Mighty\_Mouse](#): > > Was there also some kind of monkey king fu thing There was, scroll back up to post [404](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/404) for pics > [@HMS\_Irruncible](#): > > One of Rangers’ specialties is seizing airfields and preparing them for follow-on forces. Airfields are really big, so a fast way to get things done is land a C-130 with a squad of bike-mounted infantry who could zoom out the back and very quickly get the airfield marked and cleared of obstacles, and then secure key parts of the facility like control towers and ingress/egress. > > I’m not clear if this method has actually been employed in airfield seizures, but the capability was certainly trained and rehearsed. Absolutely the military will drop cargo, including vehicles, & will also drop soldiers…separately. I believe our guest of dishonor stated they should parachute soldiers in _while on_ motorcycles so they could immediately ride off to their destination. Even if they were to drop them strapped into a Humvee it could, possibly, maybe work but there’s no way a soldier can hold onto a motor cycle all the way down & it would present a hazard below them upon ground impact. OTOH, as for an 8yo’s battle plan, it’s a _great_ idea! ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/450 "2026-08-20T14:42:37Z")
> [@Frodo](#): > > Benghazi, if I’m not mistaken. > The whole problem could apparently have been avoided by just parachuting some motorcyclist commandoes. Yes. It was Hillary’s fault for not stopping the attack on the Benghazi consulate by mobilizing the nearest US military troops (which IIRC were in Italy), flying them to Benghazi (which had no suitable airfield) and parachuting motorcycle-riding troops into the city. When the rather considerable logistical problems with this plan were discussed, he doubled down on it nonetheless. It’s not _quite_ as bad as the infamous “paper towel roll” theory from another poster re the Penn State abuse scandal, but it’s certainly just as memorable. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/451 "2026-08-20T15:03:49Z")
> [@Mighty\_Mouse](#): > > Was there also some kind of monkey king fu thing? Like for real? There was stupidly long thread where he argued that if you are attacked by a monkey, you can defeat it with a double-punch on either side of its head. If you punch it from both sides at once, the force is more than doubled because of the conservation of momentum. This went on for hundreds of posts. I wish this was a parody or exaggeration. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Mouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mighty_mouse/32/7776_2.png) [@Mighty\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Mouse)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/452 "2026-08-20T15:17:52Z")
In any other place I frequent on the internet or in real life, I would be wondering why anyone would be discussing contingency plans for monkey attacks. But this is the Dope. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/453 "2026-08-20T15:20:51Z")
You’ll thank us later. ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/454 "2026-08-20T15:32:48Z")
Yeah, some of those threads got surreal. And, even if Hillary Clinton had done the terrible things they accused her of in Benghazi (and of course she didn’t), they’d be considered quaint compared to some of the shenanigans the current crop of criminals in charge of the country have pulled this month alone, much less since the beginning of the year or the beginning of the term or much of the first term. ---
**Author:** ![Love\_Rhombus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/love_rhombus/32/10694_2.png) [@Love\_Rhombus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Love_Rhombus)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/455 "2026-08-20T15:48:22Z")
Is there a place where these legendary sagas of old are preserved for the enrichment of others? ---
**Author:** ![Great\_Antibob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Great\_Antibob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Great_Antibob)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/456 "2026-08-20T16:15:35Z")
Other than the board itself? I don’t think so, but here are links (be warned, they are mostly stupid and pointless and boring) to the Double Monkey Punch and the interminable Benghazi (since locked) threads > [@Could you knock out an enraged chimp?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/could-you-knock-out-an-enraged-chimp/545830/24): > > first blow is to the wind pipe with the sharp of the knuckles and the second to both temples with both fists at the same time. This is done because the energy of a singular blow is partially absorbed by the deflection of the head. Striking from both sides doubles the force of a single blow and with nowhere for the head to deflect it transmits all the energy. I’m sure there is probably some additional trauma to the brain from 2 intersecting shock waves but I’ll leave that to engineers to expl… > [@Benghazi Attack for Dummies.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/benghazi-attack-for-dummies/673466): > > As a Canuck, I was never hugely interested in the ‘Benghazi Attack’. Then, when various versions of the truth began to circulate, and the whole thing seemed to have become “political”, any interest I had vanished. In retrospect, I regret so wilfully remaining ignorant about the initial event and the various sequelae. Indeed, in light of the recent [CBS/NYT revelations](http://www.nytimes.com/2013/11/09/business/media/cbs-correspondent-apologizes-for-report-on-benghazi-attack.html?hp), I’m now curious to know what’s going on - from start to accusations, from counter-claims to now. Problem is I don’t have a huge… ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/457 "2026-08-20T16:16:51Z")
Double Monkey Punch would be a perfect band name. ---
**Author:** ![Pork\_Rind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pork_rind/32/111_2.png) [@Pork\_Rind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pork_Rind)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/458 "2026-08-20T19:51:33Z")
Or a cocktail. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2026, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/459 "2026-08-20T20:32:59Z")
Double Monkey Punch ~~3~~ 6 oz pineapple juice ~~2~~ 4 oz orange juice ~~1~~ 2 oz dark or white rum ~~1~~ 2 oz coconut rum (or banana liqueur/99 bananas) ~~1~~ 2 Splashes of grenadine Serve in a ~~hollowed out pineapple~~ motorcycle helmet, garnish with ~~an umbrella~~ a parachute. ---
**Author:** ![Pork\_Rind](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pork_rind/32/111_2.png) [@Pork\_Rind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pork_Rind)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2026, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851/460 "2026-08-21T03:30:33Z")
I’m reporting this for false advertising- there’s absolutely no monkey in this cocktail at all. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851.md?page=22) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-magiver/937851.md?page=24)