# I pit my inlaws **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 12, 2005, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502 "2005-05-12T03:23:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![MrFantsyPants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@MrFantsyPants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrFantsyPants)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/21 "2005-05-12T22:59:39Z")
My advice, as others have already said, is to talk to your husband. He’s acting disrespectful towards you because he has no spine where his parents are concerned. If he refuses to play ball, demand that the two of you budget separately. Separate bank accounts, separate everything. He can pay out of his half, you can enjoy your half. I doubt it would actually happen, but it may be a good way of illustrating to him the unfairness of the situation. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/22 "2005-05-12T23:08:18Z")
> [@sinjin](#): > > BTW MRSin is a great guy, just sometimes too nice. There’s nice, then there’s pushover. He vowed to honor and cherish _you_, not his parents. The sooner he realizes that the better your relationship will be. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/23 "2005-05-12T23:30:49Z")
Yeesh. Your in-laws wouldn’t happen to be named [Bluth](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367279/), would they? ---
**Author:** ![Tracy\_Lord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@Tracy\_Lord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tracy_Lord)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2005, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/24 "2005-05-13T00:16:22Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Yeesh. Your in-laws wouldn’t happen to be named [Bluth](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367279/), would they? Heeeeeee! ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2005, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/25 "2005-05-13T01:24:00Z")
Sorry to get all tough love on you, but pit your husband (and probably yourself). You can cut them off any time you want. And all you have to do to stop the whining is to hang up on them. ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2005, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/26 "2005-05-13T01:26:52Z")
Oops, hit Submit too soon. If your opinion about money is being disregarded by your husband, you’ve got problems bigger and closer to home than whiny, parasitic in-laws. Your problem is with your husband. I advise you to confront it head-on. Arguments about money are a major cause of marital strife and divorce. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2005, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/27 "2005-05-13T04:00:37Z")
> [@sinjin](#): > > \ BTW MRSin is a great guy, just sometimes too nice. I was so angry last night because MrSin finally got angry, which he never does. > \ What your husband is doing doesn’t fit my definition of “nice”. “Nice” is helping his parents paint the house when it needs it; what he’s doing is enabling them to continue negative behaviour, and it’s not good for anyone. I read something great about standing up for yourself; part of respecting other people is not allowing them to do themselves the disservice of disrespecting _you_. Your husband is not helping anything with what he’s doing; he’s simply making a bad situation worse. If you extrapolate to the worst case scenario with him not giving his parents any more money, maybe they lose the house, and maybe they get a few things repossessed. Maybe they really, really need a good wake-up call to get their shit together and act like grown ups. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2005, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502/28 "2005-05-13T04:15:50Z")
> [@Loopydude](#): > > That’s the only way, ultimately, to deal with obnoxia of this sort. It’s tough love, no question, and can cause rifts, but the alternative is perpetual abuse. Pardon the hijack, but I just had to pop in and say I love the word _obnoxia_ and plan to add it to my lexicon. Hell, it should be added to Websters and OED. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-my-inlaws/303502.md?page=1)