# I Pit NotOkay for convincing the entire board umkay had died!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [June 23, 2012, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044 "2012-06-23T07:01:37Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 46

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**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/901 "2012-06-27T12:14:36Z")

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> [@Guinastasia](#):
>
> Anyone else try to parse this?

Not clear, but not overly complicated. For those whom forums are a mere trifle to, there is no compulsion to post. They care not a whit about you, nor me, nor anyone else in cyberspace. Expending effort in posting indicates they actually care about the reaction of the person on the other end, else they’d “talk” to a bot, or a diary, or wikipedia. Informing everyone of how little they care in order to gain acceptance is a juvenile tactic.

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**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/902 "2012-06-27T13:23:55Z")

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There was something about her story that was bugging me, I had intended to ask her about it before everything blew up.

Really…she was injured at AGE 14 while screwing around at a ski resort with ski resort employees ( or at least one employee ) on a homemade “monster” ski jump and the reaction of her family was "Oh well, she should’ve been more careful, lucky for us we’re rich and have an extra 10 or 20 million lying around to pay for a lifetime of care…anyway, once she gets a little better we’ll just make it clear to her that she needs to get an education and pay her own way, serves her 14 year old butt right for being stupid???

I couldn’t fathom that – no one’s THAT rich…even if by some chance her mom and dad cared more about the financial health of the ski resort’s insurer than their daughter I think someone would’ve stepped in and said " you aren’t acting in your daughter’s best interests by walking away from this, you need to sue them for a lifetime of care".

Granted, I don’t think she ever came right out and said she DIDN’T get a settlement but she talked a lot about her financial situation and a lawsuit or a settlement never came into the conversation.

And there’s an interesting angle to the whole “I’m Richie Rich rich” thing, I think she wanted to make sure that no matter how much adulation she received that no one would be tempted to ttry to give her financial help because that would turn this into a real legal fraud.

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**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/903 "2012-06-27T13:35:35Z")

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You’re right… when talking about the U.S.

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**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/904 "2012-06-27T14:08:08Z")

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> [@Myrnalene](#):
>
> Seems pretty clear to me. People only post to public forums because at some level they think what they have is worth sharing and they want other people to respond to it.

I got nothing to add to this.

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**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/905 "2012-06-27T14:42:51Z")

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> [@Ann\_Hedonia](#):
>
> And there’s an interesting angle to the whole “I’m Richie Rich rich” thing, I think she wanted to make sure that no matter how much adulation she received that no one would be tempted to ttry to give her financial help because that would turn this into a real legal fraud.

It also got her out of answering a lot of complicated questions that have to do with finding adequate care, housing, and other resources when your only income is disability and/or SSI. Being able to independently hire and schedule caretakers is a whole lot different than having to qualify for PCA hours, for example. Finding affordable/subsidized housing. Medical care. Durable medical equipment.

Being “fabulously wealthy” exempted her from having to learn about that whole side of things.

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**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/906 "2012-06-27T15:04:07Z")

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One thing that was starting to annoy me was lack of empathy towards other significantly disabled people, like fellow quads. I got much more outraged over **Sami41’s** Popsicle’s neglect and problems than she did, for example. She also seemed remarkably clueless about the impact of poverty on a quad’s quality of life. I chalked it up to being young, narcissistic, and possibly sheltered by her family but surely during rehab she would have rubbed shoulders with other disabled people with much more dire financial situations. Experience of that sort is one of the things that prompted Christopher Reeve to take on his advocate role, and he had spoken/written about the impact meeting such people, and the contrast with his own wealth, had had on him.

**Umkay?** Nothing. Then again, she was essentially a kid when paralyzed… but still, it seemed a bit off at the time, and more so now in retrospect.

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**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/907 "2012-06-27T15:41:24Z")

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> [@Broomstick](#):
>
> One thing that was starting to annoy me was lack of empathy towards other significantly disabled people, like fellow quads. I got much more outraged over **Sami41’s** Popsicle’s neglect and problems than she did, for example. She also seemed remarkably clueless about the impact of poverty on a quad’s quality of life. I chalked it up to being young, narcissistic, and possibly sheltered by her family but surely during rehab she would have rubbed shoulders with other disabled people with much more dire financial situations. Experience of that sort is one of the things that prompted Christopher Reeve to take on his advocate role, and he had spoken/written about the impact meeting such people, and the contrast with his own wealth, had had on him.
> 
> **Umkay?** Nothing. Then again, she was essentially a kid when paralyzed… but still, it seemed a bit off at the time, and more so now in retrospect.

That is the exact thing that bugged the shit out of me. I didn’t make me so much doubt her but it made me feel contempt for her and abandon reading the thread.

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**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/908 "2012-06-27T16:00:26Z")

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> [@BMalion](#):
>
> I’m well-off (the bills are paid) and not bad looking, does that count?
> 
> Besides, what do you know about wheelchairs anyway? Sheesh.

Everything!

I mean, unless you’re going to tell me that umkay’s posts weren’t legit. In which case, nothing.

How well-off are you, again? 😉

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**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\
**Post date:** [June 27, 2012, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/909 "2012-06-27T16:56:59Z")

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> [@billfish678](#):
>
> Dude
> 
> 1 Its the middle of the night.

Not anymore…

> [@](#):
>
> 2 I am a computer search retard.

So am I. I can’t find the ‘troll’ of yours that I was remembering…

> [@](#):
>
> 3 You have a better idea of what you are refering to than me

No, not really. See above…

> [@](#):
>
> Hey, it rings a bell.. but I am too stupid/lazy/tired to find it.

Me too, but add ‘drunk’ to that. Again, see above.

> [@](#):
>
> As for the Bill Fish 678 and anything have to do with USN nukes and subs…thats pretty funny because my name choice and the numbers have nothing to do with that, which makes it EVEN funnier because you could argue I could have possibly ended up on a USN nuke sub at three different points in my life…and have interacted with people that have…

Which is what you said in response to the ‘troll’ accusation that was made back then.  
[btw, mods, I may have fucked up the quote, above, while editing this post. I didn’t mean to alter it if I did. The _Illuminati_ made me do it…]

> [@](#):
>
> Hint…sometimes my cleverness is random stupidity and quite often my random stupidity may look like random cleverness 🙂

Yes, we know. We rule the world, after all. That characteristic is why we want you on our team!

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**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\
**Post date:** [June 28, 2012, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/910 "2012-06-28T03:18:34Z")

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C’mon… we can make 20 pages of butt-hurt!

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**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\
**Post date:** [June 28, 2012, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/911 "2012-06-28T04:28:34Z")

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> [@Ann\_Hedonia](#):
>
> And there’s an interesting angle to the whole “I’m Richie Rich rich” thing, I think she wanted to make sure that no matter how much adulation she received that no one would be tempted to ttry to give her financial help because that would turn this into a real legal fraud.

I figured it was just another part of her plan to make sure no one had any problem with her about anything, i.e. nobody thought she and her family got a big payday for something that was her own fault.

Sezyoo said she sued the rich banker for millions but that situation wouldn’t have been her fault at all, plus she also made sure to say that she and her husband both came from rich families and her husband made a lot of money. She didn’t want to be one of those tacky New Money people.

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**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\
**Post date:** [June 28, 2012, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/912 "2012-06-28T05:37:18Z")

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> [@Asimovian](#):
>
> If you aren’t rich and pretty, we don’t want any.

Oh, I’ll vouch for him being adorable and impish. And I have a question all ready about kilts and wheelchairs…😃

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**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\
**Post date:** [June 28, 2012, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/913 "2012-06-28T15:52:05Z")

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> [@kittenblue](#):
>
> Oh, I’ll vouch for him being adorable and impish. And I have a question all ready about kilts and wheelchairs…😃

In the words of Mr. George Takei, “Oh MY!”

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**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\
**Post date:** [June 28, 2012, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/914 "2012-06-28T19:42:58Z")

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> [@Broomstick](#):
>
> One thing that was starting to annoy me was lack of empathy towards other significantly disabled people, like fellow quads. I got much more outraged over **Sami41’s** Popsicle’s neglect and problems than she did, for example. She also seemed remarkably clueless about the impact of poverty on a quad’s quality of life. I chalked it up to being young, narcissistic, and possibly sheltered by her family but surely during rehab she would have rubbed shoulders with other disabled people with much more dire financial situations. Experience of that sort is one of the things that prompted Christopher Reeve to take on his advocate role, and he had spoken/written about the impact meeting such people, and the contrast with his own wealth, had had on him.
> 
> **Umkay?** Nothing. Then again, she was essentially a kid when paralyzed… but still, it seemed a bit off at the time, and more so now in retrospect.

Yes, same here. She pinged my troll-o-meter when she started talking about Million Dollar Baby, which I posted about [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=15217992&postcount=159). I hated that movie too, but for completely different reasons.

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**Author:** ![Simple\_Linctus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Simple\_Linctus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simple_Linctus)\
**Post date:** [June 28, 2012, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/915 "2012-06-28T21:30:57Z")

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> [@Alessan](#):
>
> You’re right… when talking about the U.S.

Exactly

Ann fwiw your post seems utterly alien to me, in that the attitude expressed by umkay’s “parents” seems far more normal than the one you’re saying they “ought” to have had.

This is presumably due to healthcare funding issues.

So maybe that means umkay is Canadian?

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**Author:** ![Sarabellum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarabellum/32/3492_2.png) [@Sarabellum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarabellum)\
**Post date:** [June 29, 2012, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/916 "2012-06-29T14:43:20Z")

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Good guess, on the Canadian bit.

Twenty years old, Canadian, female, “devotee”, suffers from depression, unemployed - that’d be MY guess. 😉

I think trolling message boards in her sexy quad disguise is her coping mechanism for depression and other mental health issues.

Honestly, I wasn’t going to say anything about her, though I smelled “troll” early on. There wasn’t anything conclusive and I was too lazy to start Googling for proof. Her posts were interesting and informative, and I felt like even if she WAS trolling, she wasn’t hurting anyone.

But after the whole “dead, not dead” bit, when Dopers were crying real tears over her lies… Yea, that went beyond the pale. The kid gloves came off.

And I know that some of my early “she’s a liar and a fake” posts were out of line, but at that point the evidence-gathering had commenced, and it really was just a matter of time.

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**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\
**Post date:** [June 29, 2012, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/917 "2012-06-29T15:37:24Z")

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> [@Ambivalid](#):
>
> I don’t think this person was really a troll; not in the typical sense. This was a “pretender” from the DPW spectrum (devotees, pretenders and wannabees). This is someone who wants, so _very badly_, to be a quadriplegic that it becomes their life.

For whatever it’s worth, I don’t think that’s true. I think it’s someone who just enjoys making up shit online and getting people to fall for it. In this case it’s trolling, not delusions or a psychological condition (apart from being an asshole).

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**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\
**Post date:** [June 29, 2012, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/918 "2012-06-29T15:37:36Z")

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> [@Sarabellum1976](#):
>
> And I know that some of my early “she’s a liar and a fake” posts were out of line, but at that point the evidence-gathering had commenced, and it really was just a matter of time.

And my hat’s off to you for your major part in that excellent bit of evidence-gathering. Good on ya.

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**Author:** ![Girl\_Next\_Door](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/977dab/32.png) [@Girl\_Next\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_Next_Door)\
**Post date:** [June 29, 2012, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/919 "2012-06-29T15:42:42Z")

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> [@Sarabellum1976](#):
>
> And I know that some of my early “she’s a liar and a fake” posts were out of line, but at that point the evidence-gathering had commenced, and it really was just a matter of time.

At the time I thought you were being _horrible_. But now, I’m really impressed. Gold star for **Sarabellum1976**.

You know, we should have the Cecil Awards. If someone does an extra great job of fighting ignorance, they get nominated for a Cecil. I’d nominate you.

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**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\
**Post date:** [June 29, 2012, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/920 "2012-06-29T15:46:41Z")

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> [@Marley23](#):
>
> For whatever it’s worth, I don’t think that’s true. I think it’s someone who just enjoys making up shit online and getting people to fall for it. In this case it’s trolling, not delusions or a psychological condition (apart from being an asshole).

Whichever way it is, I’m not sure it makes a difference to us. She\* may or may not be a pretender/wannabe. Either way, the death/resurrection bit was trolling of the most manipulative sort.

And since she can’t erase her posting history here, people at the next board she plays won’t be dependent on the sometimes limited memory of Google’s cache.  
\*I guess we don’t even know for sure that she’s a she. But might as well keep using that pronoun, barring evidence to the contrary.

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