# I Pit NotOkay for convincing the entire board umkay had died! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 23, 2012, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044 "2012-06-23T07:01:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Sarabellum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarabellum/32/3492_2.png) [@Sarabellum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarabellum)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/161 "2012-06-24T00:50:52Z")
> [@Farmer\_Jane](#): > > She could even post a pic with her face blurred out if she wanted to. Not a big deal. Takes about two minutes. Well, maybe two and a half for her. Her carers are speedy quick. Easily faked. Video blog, please. ---
**Author:** ![Patience\_Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@Patience\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patience_Jones)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/162 "2012-06-24T00:52:09Z")
I would prefer a long form birth certificate. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/163 "2012-06-24T00:53:44Z")
If its from Kenya or Hawai it ain’t gonna fly 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/164 "2012-06-24T00:56:06Z")
> [@Sarabellum1976](#): > > Easily faked. > > Video blog, please. Well, now that I think about it, **Ambi** posted shirtless pics. So I say go shirtless or it didn’t happen. :o ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/165 "2012-06-24T01:09:10Z")
FWIW, I ran quite a few of **Umkay’s** posts through the Gender Guesser (to the tune of over 20,000 words). It found her words to be written by a female, although it said “weak female.” To be fair, though – I ran a lot of my posts through the same thing and it also said weak female (and I assure you, I’m ALL female). \*\*Notokay’s \*\*words were too few to be accurately analyzed but just on the basis of their one post, the GG found them to write like a male. _shrug_ No dog in this fight, but I’m certainly not ready to start hurling accusations. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/166 "2012-06-24T01:12:18Z")
> [@PandaBear77](#): > > FWIW, I ran quite a few of **Umkay’s** posts through the Gender Guesser (to the tune of over 20,000 words). It found her words to be written by a female, although it said “weak female.” To be fair, though – I ran a lot of my posts through the same thing and it also said weak female (and I assure you, I’m ALL female). > > \*\*Notokay’s \*\*words were too few to be accurately analyzed but just on the basis of their one post, the GG found them to write like a male. What a strange thing to say/do. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/167 "2012-06-24T01:16:22Z")
I’m a weak male and a weak female. And I’m European! So all this time I’ve been perpetuating a fraud. ---
**Author:** ![Myrnalene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@Myrnalene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrnalene)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/168 "2012-06-24T01:17:25Z")
I ran some of my posts through and it said I am a weak male. Or possibly European. So, um, yeah. Not really striking evidence. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/169 "2012-06-24T01:26:59Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > I asked her about a site for devotees, and she found it,“weird”. Well _of course_ she did. What would you expect a devotee to say to a messageboard that he was trying to convince that devoteeism was a normal, harmless, healthy off-shoot of normal sexual attraction? ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/170 "2012-06-24T01:29:03Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > So, help me understand your thinking here. > > You think \*\*umkay \*\*was a troll, then created a sock to kill off a wildly successful troll, then quickly came back as the original troll to point out that the sock was a troll? Pretty much what others have said. It’s that she comes out the gate with this completely ridiculous story, the details of which are fascinatingly absurd and a little too perfect at times, that is somehow told in whole pages via some combination of dictation and chin typing, and any other difficulties someone in her condition may have had are conveniently whisked away in her case by her enormous wealth (and beauty – don’t forget she’s young and beautiful). The 20-page schmaltz fest became too much for me, and I checked out of that shit show entirely. The whole “She’s dead! Hey I’m not dead! Oh noez, it’s time to leave now because of the unpleasantness” shenanigans do not help, but I thought her story was ridiculous from the beginning. > [@Ambivalid](#): > > Hey, I freely admit I am a naive when it comes to these sorts of online hoaxs. I will admit; her ability to do sophisticated post-editing and mulit-quoting, etc., is rather curious. If I’m wrong, I’m wrong. I guess it’s just that I can’t imagine _why_ anyone would do anything like this-if it’s all a hoax. Why do people troll the internet? I don’t know. Maybe for the same reason they say supposebly: because they’re retarded. > [@Pitchmeister](#): > > ETA: (directed at **cmyk** , but by extension everyone who believes **umkay** is a troll) > > What have you gained by doubting her? I haven’t gained anything. The same way I haven’t gained anything by doubting the king of Nigeria wants to fax me a check for $1,000,000. As for our friend bowing out, Brava! Full marks. ---
**Author:** ![clnilsen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecccb3/32.png) [@clnilsen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clnilsen)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/171 "2012-06-24T01:43:53Z")
I wish my B/S detector was good enough to pick out is this is all trolling/socking etc, so I’ll leave it to wiser people than I . That Said, I think a kick butt board I’d would be IamNotNotOkay 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/172 "2012-06-24T01:47:32Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > I’m a weak male and a weak female. And I’m European! > > So all this time I’ve been perpetuating a fraud. On the other hand it told me I was 99 percent likely to be a dumbass southern redneck asshole. I think that thing is working. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/173 "2012-06-24T01:52:51Z")
> [@PandaBear77](#): > > FWIW, I ran quite a few of **Umkay’s** posts through the Gender Guesser (to the tune of over 20,000 words). It found her words to be written by a female, although it said “weak female.” To be fair, though – I ran a lot of my posts through the same thing and it also said weak female (and I assure you, I’m ALL female). And I just ran [one of **umkay’s** longer posts](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=15200076&postcount=114) thru the same GenderGesser program, and it came back “weak male,” both in the formal and informal modes. I can only conclude that **umkay** is European. The wheelchair factor was not addressed by that program. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/174 "2012-06-24T02:01:06Z")
> [@PandaBear77](#): > > Gender Guesser Weak male?! Possibly _ **European?!** _:dubious: I _bleed_ Amurican Exceptionialism, dammit! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/175 "2012-06-24T02:12:19Z")
Pictures don’t mean a thing – **Kaitlyn** , if you’ll recall, posted a few, which later turned out to be of some Chinese celebrity. > [@Blackberry](#): > > Skydive? > (If I was a quadriplegic I’d probably spend a lot of time on the Internet too, but by **umkay** ’s reports her life is extremely full, so that doesn’t really work.) Wait – she skydives? (Or did she speak about doing that before her accident? I’m not going through that entire saga again) Honestly, I don’t give much of a shit if she’s a troll (it’s not like she’s claiming to have dying kids or something like that) but the whole, “oh, how dare you, she’s soooo wonderful” – this place can be so fucking gullible. For a site that’s supposed to be about fighting ignorance, it seems to me that people here fall for every stupid sob story that comes along. It’s pathetic. I confess, I fell for the whole **Kaitlyn** story, and looking back, it’s pretty embarassing. **Ambivalid** – what are SCI and DPW? ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/176 "2012-06-24T02:22:23Z")
Wait… is European a _gender_ now? Or is it just a new name for metrosexual? ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/177 "2012-06-24T02:24:05Z")
I think there is a perfect solution to quell the doubters and educate everyone at the same time. umkay should have her caretaker take a short video of her computer screen while she composes an SDMB post with her voice control software. Do some special formatting, a quick edit: basically, just a quick demonstration of the same sort of posting dexterity she has already demonstrated thus far. Best of all, no identifying information has to be revealed. I think it would be quite educational, while definitively proving her non-trolldom. ---
**Author:** ![storyteller0910](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@storyteller0910](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/storyteller0910)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/178 "2012-06-24T02:26:32Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > I think there is a perfect solution to quell the doubters and educate everyone at the same time. umkay should have her caretaker take a short video of her computer screen while she composes an SDMB post with her voice control software. Do some special formatting, a quick edit: basically, just a quick demonstration of the same sort of posting dexterity she has already demonstrated thus far. Best of all, no identifying information has to be revealed. > > I think it would be quite educational, while definitively proving her non-trolldom. That’s a fair request. Let’s all do it! You first. ---
**Author:** ![Do\_Not\_Taunt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/do_not_taunt/32/2968_2.png) [@Do\_Not\_Taunt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Do_Not_Taunt)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/179 "2012-06-24T02:28:42Z")
> [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](#): > > This entire post is well-reasoned, and if more facts come out that damn her, I may be inclined to jump on the bandwagon. **What I see right now is people calling her a liar because she is a suspiciously fast typist and had some fancy formatting in her latest OP, plus someone under a different username pronounced her dead and people have lied about physical conditions before.** By all means, call me out if I’ve left out something significant. > > I am not at ALL saying to blindly trust everything your read on the internet. I’m saying knowing what I know of this situation, I would be a little more hesitant to point fingers than many others seem to be. The bolded sentence above (my emphasis added) pretty much sums it up, as far as I know. The theory that **umkay** is a devotee rather than a quad is _plausible_, sure, but I hardly think that it’s indicative of gullibility to believe it’s still more likely that she is who she says she is. Which is where I come down at the moment - the most probable story that fits the facts is that **umkay** is a quad, **notOkay** was a troll, they are different people, don’t know each other, and **umkay** is alive. Adding on preview: I don’t think she has to prove anything to us. There just isn’t enough evidence that she isn’t who she says she is. Also, what **storyteller0910** said. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2012, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044/180 "2012-06-24T02:29:21Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > **Ambivalid** – what are SCI and DPW? **SCI** -spinal cord injury. **DPW** -the abbreviation for those who fall under the spectrum of Devotee, Pretender and Wannabe. Of the three, Devotees are the most prevalent; followed by Pretenders and then Wannabees. These are the most extreme of them all; they will actually inflict harm upon themselves (self-mutilate) in order to achieve the disability that they feel they always ‘should have had’. Pretenders will, as the name implies, pretend to be disabled and use a wheelchair; sometimes living this way for as long as they can. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-notokay-for-convincing-the-entire-board-umkay-had-died/626044.md?page=10)