# I pit people that accuse me of being "negative." **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 23, 2013, 9:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006 "2013-12-23T09:44:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2013, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/161 "2013-12-31T21:35:14Z")
**I pit people that accuse me of being "negative."** Maybe if you add another negative person, you’ll make a positive!! ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2013, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/162 "2013-12-31T22:05:05Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > She has no butthole, I’m glad I read this thread and I’m adding this to the list of thoughts I use to perk myself up when feeling down. “Hey, at least I have a butthole.” ---
**Author:** ![Jesse\_Pinkman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@Jesse\_Pinkman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesse_Pinkman)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2014, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/163 "2014-01-01T15:55:45Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > Bill Hicks, on the show \*Cops \*: That’s basically the main reason I stopped watching reality TV. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2014, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/164 "2014-01-01T21:56:04Z")
Sorry to be going negative on you here, fella, but it’s _I pit people **WHO** accuse me of being “negative.”_ Get it right. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/165 "2014-01-02T05:31:39Z")
> [@Jesse\_Pinkman](#): > > That’s basically the main reason I stopped watching reality TV. You have begun to tread the path to wisdom, Grasshopper… ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/166 "2014-01-02T06:45:43Z")
You just need to take action to get what you want. So far the only thing you seem interested in is girls. Listen to what people are saying: the only thing you really need to get a gf is a job and a shower. Challenge mode is to do it without those things, but nevermind that. Choose someone you like, avoid the married and already taken, and go for it. If it is hot chicks you like, then go for a hot chick. The point is that if you are really interested you will not come across as insincere and you will have a chance. If you get rejected, well how much more depressed could you get anyway? If it is just sex you want, well then go for that. You can be upfront about that or you can try to, gee I dunno, make friends with someone sexy. Either way please wear a condom. And then there is this: > [@PunditLisa](#): > > Listen, if you want a girlfriend, you don’t need to change your negativity; just master the guitar or learn how to sing. Negative normal people = whiny. Negative creative people = tortured. Women _flock_ to tortured souls. I don’t know if I would say women flock to tortured souls exactly, but back in my musician days I spent most of my time with one gf or another. I was whiny and depressed in my 20’s, but I was really into music, so part of my schtick was to try to write the saddest song ever. Not just that, but it was one thing. Anyway, in retrospect it was a useful exercise- in the end I realized that I could never top Woody Guthrie’s Dust Bowl Ballads, among other sad songs, which was depressing in itself, sure, being a failed musician and all, but at least I attempted something and got some insight out of it. And I found a better outlet for my whiny bitchiness than just bitching whinily. Maybe you’re interested in some hobby? As long as it isn’t blue meth, just take an interest in something and chase girls you really like. They’re mostly rather sad themselves you know. ---
**Author:** ![Jesse\_Pinkman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@Jesse\_Pinkman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesse_Pinkman)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/167 "2014-01-02T07:20:46Z")
> [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](#): > > You just need to take action to get what you want. So far the only thing you seem interested in is girls. Listen to what people are saying: the only thing you really need to get a gf is a job and a shower. Challenge mode is to do it without those things, but nevermind that. Choose someone you like, avoid the married and already taken, and go for it. If it is hot chicks you like, then go for a hot chick. The point is that if you are really interested you will not come across as insincere and you will have a chance. If you get rejected, well how much more depressed could you get anyway? > > If it is just sex you want, well then go for that. You can be upfront about that or you can try to, gee I dunno, make friends with someone sexy. Either way please wear a condom. > > And then there is this: > > I don’t know if I would say women flock to tortured souls exactly, but back in my musician days I spent most of my time with one gf or another. I was whiny and depressed in my 20’s, but I was really into music, so part of my schtick was to try to write the saddest song ever. Not just that, but it was one thing. Anyway, in retrospect it was a useful exercise- in the end I realized that I could never top Woody Guthrie’s Dust Bowl Ballads, among other sad songs, which was depressing in itself, sure, being a failed musician and all, but at least I attempted something and got some insight out of it. And I found a better outlet for my whiny bitchiness than just bitching whinily. > > Maybe you’re interested in some hobby? As long as it isn’t blue meth, just take an interest in something and chase girls you really like. They’re mostly rather sad themselves you know. I know this reply is just going to piss you all off more, but I already can play guitar and still practice regularly. Frankly though, I’ve thought about quitting because no one wants to hear me play or really gives a shit. ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/168 "2014-01-02T07:44:23Z")
Well, I basically quit to grow up and have a career and so on, but I’m 40 now and it was all a long time ago. Music is a tough gig and people mostly won’t give a shit. But you don’t need the whole world to give a shit. Even if you kind of suck at it (I was never a musical genius), you will still, artistically speaking, be a step ahead of the general public and some people will appreciate the artistic value of your work, even if they happen to be fellow miserable depressives like yourself. This will give you insight and will help you grow out of the socially awkward stage you’re in. You will get invited to parties, you will meet girls even if they are seemingly unattainable. They really aren’t unattainable, the sad truth is mostly they aren’t worth it. Do it. If you want to quit, if you’re like me and there is too much drinking and bullshit in the music world, then quit and do something else. But do something. ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/169 "2014-01-02T11:37:08Z")
You’re stuck in a downward cycle… You are a negative person. Most people don’t like to spend a lot of time around a negative person. Therefore, no girls are interested in you. This makes you more of a negative person. Do you realise this? ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/170 "2014-01-02T15:53:16Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Sorry to be going negative on you here, fella, but it’s _I pit people **WHO** accuse me of being “negative.”_ > > Get it right. For a site that purportedly claims to fight ignorance there sure is a lot being slung around. The correct phrasing is, “I pit people **whom** accuse me of being negative.” ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/171 "2014-01-02T15:58:05Z")
No it isn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2014, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/172 "2014-01-02T16:39:04Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > For a site that purportedly claims to fight ignorance there sure is a lot being slung around. > > The correct phrasing is, “I pit people **whom** accuse me of being negative.” Sober up there, **Smurf**. :smack: (I pit) (people who accuse me of being negative) > [@Kobal2](#): > > Well, fair’s fair : he probably gets laid once in a while too. Being married and all. Yeah, I used to think marriage worked that way too. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Jesse\_Pinkman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@Jesse\_Pinkman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesse_Pinkman)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/173 "2014-01-04T02:07:48Z")
> [@sandra\_nz](#): > > You’re stuck in a downward cycle… > > You are a negative person. > Most people don’t like to spend a lot of time around a negative person. > Therefore, no girls are interested in you. > This makes you more of a negative person. > > Do you realise this? Well, guess I’m doomed then. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/174 "2014-01-04T03:25:12Z")
It may already have been posted, but if you’re looking for self-help, several people I know have found this somewhat motivating: [here.](http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/) ---
**Author:** ![SerafinaPekala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@SerafinaPekala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SerafinaPekala)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/175 "2014-01-04T04:18:40Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > It may already have been posted, but if you’re looking for self-help, several people I know have found this somewhat motivating: [here.](http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/) now THAT is interesting! and useful! thx for posting it. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/176 "2014-01-04T05:04:49Z")
That was fucking brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![Jesse\_Pinkman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@Jesse\_Pinkman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesse_Pinkman)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/177 "2014-01-04T07:01:52Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > It may already have been posted, but if you’re looking for self-help, several people I know have found this somewhat motivating: [here.](http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/) I’ve seen it. All the harsh truths do is reinforce how hopeless I am. “If you want to work here, close.” Well, I’ve proven over and over again that I can’t fucking close. I’ve been doing that for almost three decades now, so there’s no reason to assume the rest of the shitty time that I’m spending on this rock will be any different. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/178 "2014-01-04T07:08:22Z")
> [@Jesse\_Pinkman](#): > > I’ve seen it. All the harsh truths do is reinforce how hopeless I am. > > “If you want to work here, close.” Well, I’ve proven over and over again that I can’t fucking close. I’ve been doing that for almost three decades now, so there’s no reason to assume the rest of the shitty time that I’m spending on this rock will be any different. If you’re just 30, you haven’t really been living as an adult yet. You’re just about to start the period of your life when you actually start becoming a useful human being. ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/179 "2014-01-04T07:11:11Z")
> [@Jesse\_Pinkman](#): > > Well, guess I’m doomed then. Not really. There’s a way out… Observe what types of guys have luck with girls, and how they behave. Imitate those behaviours (i.e. fake being a more positive person). Get laid. Feel better. Start to be a better person because you’re feeling better. Continue imitating the positive behaviours (only now maybe you don’t have to work so hard to fake them) Get laid again. Feel even better. Start to get more positive feedback from others now that you’re less negative. Feel even better. Rinse, repeat. ---
**Author:** ![Jesse\_Pinkman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a183cd/32.png) [@Jesse\_Pinkman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jesse_Pinkman)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2014, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006/180 "2014-01-04T08:06:35Z")
> [@sandra\_nz](#): > > Not really. There’s a way out… > > Observe what types of guys have luck with girls, and how they behave. > Imitate those behaviours (i.e. fake being a more positive person). > Get laid. > Feel better. > Start to be a better person because you’re feeling better. > Continue imitating the positive behaviours (only now maybe you don’t have to work so hard to fake them) > Get laid again. > Feel even better. > Start to get more positive feedback from others now that you’re less negative. > Feel even better. > Rinse, repeat. Fantastic. Now here’s what will happen in execution: Observe what types of guys have luck with girls, and how they behave. Imitate those behaviours (i.e. fake being a more positive person). Fail miserably. Be unable to figure out why. Hang self in closet. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-that-accuse-me-of-being-negative/677006.md?page=10)