# I Pit people who use the word "retarded" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 2, 2011, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091 "2011-01-02T00:02:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2011, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/141 "2011-01-04T23:39:57Z")
What I would’ve said/thought at hte time: “He looks awful.” ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2011, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/142 "2011-01-04T23:48:26Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > What I would’ve said/thought at hte time: “He looks awful.” Awful in what way? ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2011, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/143 "2011-01-04T23:58:33Z")
> [@Stratocaster](#): > > I don’t go beserk, but I’ll answer anyway. I would say “mentally retarded” to refer to the mentally retarded. But sorry, you’re wrong, “retard” (used as noun, as I noted) is to “mentally retarded person” as “nigger” is to “black person.” It’s a [slur](http://www.thefreedictionary.com/retard):You can say, “well, I don’t mean it that way,” and so could someone saying, “nigger.” But that won’t change the fact that it is by definition a derogatory term. Well I see you your definition and raise you one: Definition of RETARD 1 \ri-ˈtärd\ : a holding back or slowing down : retardation 2 \ˈrē-ˌtärd\ often offensive : a retarded person; also : a person held to resemble a retarded person in behavior It is not _unambiguously_ offensive. It can be offensive but it also descriptive. > [@](#): > > What I would’ve said/thought at hte time: “He looks awful.” Was he dressed funny? Did he look sick? Was his hair un-styled? And how did he sound? Because that was what was being described. He sounded retarded. Oh, excuse me-- he sounded mentally retarded. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2011, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/144 "2011-01-05T00:30:16Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > He sounded retarded. Oh, excuse me-- he sounded mentally retarded. Isn’t it supposed to be “he sounded like a retard”? All these rules are confusing. ---
**Author:** ![ecco477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b2d939/32.png) [@ecco477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ecco477)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2011, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/145 "2011-01-05T00:49:37Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > The word “special” is also used insultingly…As long as you don’t do it in the company of someone who is “special”, I don’t really see the harm. The same with “retarded.” Agreed, we should do it behind their backs–:eek: ---
**Author:** ![ecco477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b2d939/32.png) [@ecco477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ecco477)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2011, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/146 "2011-01-05T00:55:42Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > **What I would’ve said/thought at hte time: “He looks awful.”** That is the worst! I hate it when I’m really sick, high fever, haven’t showered in three days because it’ll be too damn cold getting out of the shower…and your friend comes over and reminds you “you look aweful!” As skanky as I looked and felt, I’d rather have my friend giggle and say “you look retarded.” That might lift my spirits, and possibly get me in the shower.(I do however, have a very sick sense of humor…dead baby jokes anyone?:eek:) ---
**Author:** ![BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2011, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/147 "2011-01-05T02:16:17Z")
> [@Stratocaster](#): > > I don’t go beserk, but I’ll answer anyway. I would say “mentally retarded” to refer to the mentally retarded. But sorry, you’re wrong, “retard” (used as noun, as I noted) is to “mentally retarded person” as “nigger” is to “black person.” It’s a [slur](http://www.thefreedictionary.com/retard):You can say, “well, I don’t mean it that way,” and so could someone saying, “nigger.” But that won’t change the fact that it is by definition a derogatory term. I’d be curious to see your response to **Max** , who said that being mentally challenged (or blind or deaf) is by definition a bad thing (note: not that the sufferers of such are bad people) while being black or gay is not inherently bad. Thus, calling someone of normal intelligence retarded does not equal calling them a nigger, because nigger is a derogatory way to refer to something not inherently bad, while retard is a derogatory way to refer to something that is. I’d also like to see your response to my earlier point about how both moron and idiot are old clinical terms that have become acceptable insults. Why is retard different? ETA: Also, what is your response to someone who tells you that calling someone who is mentally challenged or developmentally delayed “mentally retarded” is offensive? I would never call someone with mental problems retarded. Just like with idiot or moron, it has become completely separate for me, used only as an insult to people of normal intelligence. It surprises me, given your position in this thread, that you still use MR instead of a more up to date euphemism. ---
**Author:** ![DragonAsh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/db5fbb/32.png) [@DragonAsh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DragonAsh)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2011, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/148 "2011-01-06T18:45:58Z")
> [@Lobot](#): > > I’ve only skimmed this thread, but let me expand upon what I said in the Dick Clark thread. > > I’m disabled, and I absolutely, 100% think you do yourself no favours with this attitude, painting yourself as an oversensitive ninny with too much time on your hands. Furthermore, by talking about the opinions of “MANY in the disabled community”, you attempt to intimidate those who disagree into silence while speaking for those of us who want no part in your linguistic fascism. > > The result of every instance of this hysterical insistence on only _approved_ words being used in _approved_ contexts (never mind the speaker’s intent) is that people feel they have to play a game of Russian Roulette whenever they speak to someone in a wheelchair. This is only exacerbated by the fact that every one of the word police seems to have their own idea about which words are kosher. > > You know how sometimes people seem hyper-aware of their language when talking to a disabled person? “Am I being sensitive but not condescending? What if I cause offence? Oh God, Johnnie, don’t stare at the poor man!” etc., etc. It’s because of this word roulette bullshit that nice, good-hearted, well-meaning people feel so on edge when conversing with the disabled. > > This is why people in wheelchairs are regarded as different and alien and existing in a whole other sphere–because hypersensitive fuckheads would rather berate people about well-intentioned word usage, reinforcing the idea that the disabled should be tip-toed around rather than treated like anyone else. > > **etv78** , you and your ilk are doing nothing but a disservice to those of us who are just going about our day-to-day lives trying to be a regular part of society. > > If you want to spaz-out like some fucking mongoloid cripple, knock yourself out, but don’t drag the rest of us into it just to support one of your retarded “berserk buttons”, you imbecile. _Applauds_ (fully quoting, because the above deserves being repeated as often as possible) ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2011, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/149 "2011-01-06T18:51:22Z")
Q: How is **etv78** like Todd Palin? A: They’re both fucking retards. It took me several days to come up with that riddle. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2011, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/150 "2011-01-06T18:56:21Z")
> [@bup](#): > > Q: How is **etv78** like Todd Palin? > > A: They’re both fucking retards. > > It took me several days to come up with that riddle. [Obligatory image.](http://latewire.com/images/watermark.php/palin%20biden%20retarded%20vagina.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2011, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/151 "2011-01-06T19:00:03Z")
I think we can all agree that using the word “retarded” as a disparaging comment is really gay. ---
**Author:** ![BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BellRungBookShut-CandleSnuffed)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/152 "2011-01-07T01:49:26Z")
At least it’s not niggardly. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2011, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/153 "2011-01-08T23:02:18Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > “Cripple” was in the name of the school early in its history, but was eventually dropped, for much the same reason Negro isn’t used much anymore (the UNCF being the obvious exception). The NAACP might be dealing with a bit of a name problem as well, eh? Mom was a Special Ed teacher and then administrator. When I was 19, I worked at a summer camp for- brace yourselves- mentally retarded adults. Yep. That’s what the great Commonwealth of Pennsylvania called them, that is what the camp staff called them. And nobody got sued for the use of that language. Instead, everyone did their job in a professional, caring, supportive manner and tended the clients’ needs. And showed them a great camp experience. I struggle to equate M.R. with the more inflammatory words cited in this thread ( none of which need to be repeated here ) There are many decades of cite proving that “mentally retarded” was and in some camps still is a clinically acceptable term for a range of deficits. If you are dealing with someone involved in the field of caring for folks who are/were termed MR, that phrase would typically lead to a discussion that more accurately described the range of abilities/ range of deficits that the particular person lived with. For example, at camp there were Mild, Moderate, Severe and Profound. These words help to quantify the descriptor MR. Classifications in the scientific sense ( IMHO ) have nothing to do with negative terms, cruel words, hate speech or stereotyping. If a client at camp was Severely Mentally Retarded ( based upon information shared with us by his residence, family etc. ) then he would be housed with others at his capacity. Is this being derogatory? Is this bigoted or hateful? Exclusionary? No. It’s a useful way to make sure that folks who function at similar levels share the same experience for the week. Nothing nefarious. Just a clinical method. I see it as apples and oranges. The term “mentally retarded” hardly belongs in the same hatespeech category as the other terms shared in this thread. Now, for a tangent to the OP and original thread. I’m aware that Dick Clark Productions owns New Years’ Rockin’ Eve as an entity and it is co-produced and aired over ABC/Disney. Clark’s relationship to ABC harkens back to the earliest days of [American Bandstand](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Bandstand) in Philly. I think he’s a pretty brilliant producer of a unique kind of product. That said, having Dick Clark host a late-night " Rockin’ New Years’ Eve " was- even before his stroke- a bit like having Steve Young and a host of other concussion-damaged former NFL players host a college football game broadcast. If you are pitching youth, excitement, energy, edginess and so on, you’re using the wrong shill if you’re using a guy who made his big mark in the late 1950’s/early 1960’s. Pre-stroke, it was a bit of a stretch to watch Clark gamely host a rock and rollapalooza. Now? I’m embarassed for his ego and for the damage to his product. To be blunt, his ego prevents him from bowing out and allowing Ryan Whatshisname to be the new face. That’s a production problem. That’s not a politically incorrect labeling problem. Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091/154 "2011-01-09T23:54:15Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Sounds like some people here need to get off the short bus. Isn’t that “Special” 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-people-who-use-the-word-retarded/566091.md?page=7)