# I pit: Tall Jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 19, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620 "2005-05-19T19:04:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/21 "2005-05-19T21:17:51Z")
Speaking just for myself, it’s tall _tales_, of which I’m not too fond. What? ---
**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/22 "2005-05-19T21:26:51Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > I think it’s the same as people making stupid name jokes when they find out that you have an unusual name - they’re not trying to be assholes, they’re just trying to be friendly. > > Granted, it get’s old after a while, but people WONT stop. > > My favorite response to a stupid name joke is “Wow - you know, I’m 32 years old, and I’ve NEVER heard that one before. Really.” > > Of course, many people think that I’m a big bad bitch, so you may want to keep that in mind. 😃 Exactly. My last name is frighteningly close to Neandrthal. That’s my standard response, "Gee, never heard THAT one before. 😛 And yes, it will never stop. 42 years and going. ---
**Author:** ![Nunavut\_Boy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e95f7d/32.png) [@Nunavut\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nunavut_Boy)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/23 "2005-05-19T21:30:20Z")
I’m only 6’, but man do I hate it when a bunch of people are taller than me. I don’t care if one or two of them are, but when 5 or 6 of your good buddies are 6’3" or taller and you’re hanging out just with them, you start to get Napoleon complex or something. ---
**Author:** ![Leviosaurus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Leviosaurus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leviosaurus)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/24 "2005-05-19T21:35:26Z")
I have a tall group of friends I hang out with. Once we went camping in rural Northern Michigan. We walked into a store in a small town, one after another, my 6’2 friends went first, followed by Mr. 6’4’’ and Mr. 6’5’’, followed by me. The poor woman behind the counter was quite flustered. “Wow, you’re the tallest group of buys I’ve ever seen!” She pointed at me saying “And you’re the tallest person I’ve ever seen in my life!” That’s the exact moment my 6’9’’ friend walked in. But yeah, I know what you mean about the Napolean complex. One member of the group is 6’ and we always tease him. ---
**Author:** ![Leviosaurus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Leviosaurus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leviosaurus)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/25 "2005-05-19T21:36:40Z")
> [@Leviosaurus](#): > > Wow, you’re the tallest group of buys I’ve ever seen!" Er, “Boys” :smack: must use preview… must use preview… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/26 "2005-05-19T21:43:44Z")
> [@FinnAgain](#): > > Might I wager that I now know why you chose the name “giraffe” ? I thought it was because of his prehensile tongue. ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/27 "2005-05-19T22:37:50Z")
me am not a tall person… I’m friends with two brothers, one is 6’4", the other is 6’5". I went to a party they were having and there were lots of guys taller than them (pro ball players etc.). I asked one of my friends about this and they relied, “Whenever I meet someone taller than me, I make them my friend, 'cause I sure as hell don’t want them as my enemy!” ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/28 "2005-05-19T22:50:13Z")
Damn. I came in here hoping to get some tall jokes to wield against my over-six-foot enemies. – Uke (6 feet tall…or Normal, in other words) ---
**Author:** ![Kevbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@Kevbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kevbo)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/29 "2005-05-19T23:23:49Z")
Mostly it doesn’t bother me at all, but occassionally I like to get in a dig: “Whoa, those are some boats, what size shoe do you wear” “14D, what is your cup size?” ( well endowed female) “Do you play Basketball” “No, are you a Jockey?” “How’s the weather up there?” “Mostly sunny with a good chance of silly assed questions.” And on the RARE occasions when someone has an origional, it does give me a little chuckle. One time I was going through the listing of dive shops in the yellow pages looking for a pair of full-foot diving fins…size 14. Well, being in this thread, you see it coming, but about the third shop said, deadpan, “You wear a size 14 shoe, you don’t need fins.” ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2005, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/30 "2005-05-19T23:43:35Z")
> [@Leviosaurus](#): > > The comment that’s always gotten me is “Wow, you’re tall!” I get this at least three times a day. (6’7’’) My usual response is “Again? Damn!” > > Full disclosure: I was standing in line for registration in college lo, many years ago when the tallest person I’ve ever seen in my life walked up behind me. I turned around and my eye level was literally even with his chest. He must have been over seven feet tall. I looked up at him, and damn if I didn’t start to say “wow, you’re t…” but I managed to stop myself just in time. Guys my height just don’t have that experience, it was wierd. [funny tall story] In the 60’s my father was in charge of construction of a building not far from UCLA. He had a laborer working there who was known as “Tiny”. Tiny was a stunted lad of 6’5" and about 250 lbs. One very large, very muscled man who was used to being the bigest guy around. (hell of a nice guy too) Anyway one day Tiny was outside the jobsite wall, and walks around the corner, and he is staring at another guys chin. He stops, starts looking up and up till he get eye to eye with the man then known as Lew Alcindor. Tiny stepped aside, and let him pass. The guys who saw this were laughing their asses off. [/FTS] ---
**Author:** ![LifeOnWry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/96bed5/32.png) [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/31 "2005-05-20T00:49:05Z")
> [@Madd Maxx](#): > > So, how is the weather up there? > > ::d&r:: Don’t ask pissed-off tall people this question. They spit in your hair and reply, “It’s raining.” ---
**Author:** ![LifeOnWry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/96bed5/32.png) [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/32 "2005-05-20T00:50:54Z")
Dammit! I totally missed that **Revtim** already said that. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/33 "2005-05-20T01:48:29Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > I’m 6’4" and I went out recently with someone who was 6’11". > > It was cool to have to stand on my tiptoes to kiss them. Man, at six foot even I’ve all but given up on finding someone significantly taller than me. Hope remains! ---
**Author:** ![El\_Zagna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@El\_Zagna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Zagna)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/34 "2005-05-20T02:08:48Z")
It could be worse. You could work at Wendy’s and have to listen to all the finger in my chili jokes, “… and a side of chili, please, cut the fingers. Heh-heh-heh!” ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/35 "2005-05-20T04:12:33Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > I’m 6’4" and I went out recently with someone who was 6’11". > > It was cool to have to stand on my tiptoes to kiss them. We all know you’re gay, **Mockingbird**. You don’t have to do the pronoun thing. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![infamousmom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/d6d6ee/32.png) [@infamousmom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/infamousmom)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/36 "2005-05-20T06:14:54Z")
My son is 6’7". His answers: Two meters. No, I’m a jockey. (He might or might not add “On the Clydesdales.”) _spit_ It’s raining. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/37 "2005-05-20T06:31:41Z")
> [@FordPrefect](#): > > Were your date conjoined twins? 😉 Well, we looked that way for a bit, but that’s venturing into TMI land. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/38 "2005-05-20T06:33:09Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > Man, at six foot even I’ve all but given up on finding someone significantly taller than me. > > Hope remains! It does. I just went out with someone who was also slightly taller than me. **Thank you, Bovine Growth Hormone!** 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Shalmanese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shalmanese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shalmanese)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/39 "2005-05-20T06:44:34Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > I think it’s the same as people making stupid name jokes when they find out that you have an unusual name - they’re not trying to be assholes, they’re just trying to be friendly. > > Granted, it get’s old after a while, but people WONT stop. > > My favorite response to a stupid name joke is “Wow - you know, I’m 32 years old, and I’ve NEVER heard that one before. Really.” > > Of course, many people think that I’m a big bad bitch, so you may want to keep that in mind. 😃 Well, what do you expect with a first name like alice and a last name like wonderland? Sheesh! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Leviosaurus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@Leviosaurus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leviosaurus)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2005, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620/40 "2005-05-20T07:24:50Z")
I keep racking my brains trying to think of a really funny or clever or tall joke I’ve heard, but they fact is, I’ve never heard one. They’re all stupid. They consist of 1. Statements on the order of “Wow, you’re tall!” (Why are you telling me this? How could I possibly be unaware of that fact?) 2. The ever popular “How’s the weather up there?” (Why in the world would this ever be considered amusing? Has \*anyone ever \* heard this question and laughed in response?) I hereby challenge the teeming millions to produce an amusing greeting appropriate for introduction to a person of exceptional height. This must be an original idea, must be found amusing by a)most of the people on this thread and b) me. (I’m the one making up the rules, why should I bother being egalitarian?) “Amusing” is defined as being “Laugh out loud funny”. The winner gets a kiss from \*\*Mockingbird \*\* (assuming \*\*Mockingbird \*\* agrees, of course,) as well as eternal internet fame for supplanting the overused and weatherbeaten “How’s the weather up there?” question. Any takers? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-tall-jokes/304620.md?page=3)