# I Pit the Empire **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 5, 2010, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559 "2010-11-05T08:14:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/21 "2010-11-05T13:26:44Z")
Someone really needs more fiber in their diet. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/22 "2010-11-05T13:28:17Z")
Dammit, what, another “George Lucas is the SUXXOR rant”? ---
**Author:** ![Nars\_Glinley](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nars_glinley/32/8177_2.png) [@Nars\_Glinley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nars_Glinley)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/23 "2010-11-05T13:54:13Z")
In Soviet Russia, the Empire pits you. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/24 "2010-11-05T13:54:31Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Your only two notable accomplishments are exterminating your native population and enslaving your imported black population. And pizza delivery within 30 minutes. People always forget that one. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/25 "2010-11-05T13:55:12Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Yes, it is. Indeed, I am posting this from my mother’s basement. Because I am a friendless virgin with nothing better to do. > > Why not go overboard with the **ad hominem** attacks? The sky is the limit, my friend, as long as you let your overactive imagination run free. > > Come on, give me another adolescent insult. Wow. I didn’t know that term was in a Speak & Spell. As for the Empire, please leave your name and country and we’ll invade you when we have room in our schedule. Thank you for choosing US for fulfilling your Heartless Oppressor needs. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/26 "2010-11-05T13:59:37Z")
To the OP: kneel before Zod. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/27 "2010-11-05T14:03:14Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > And pizza delivery within 30 minutes. People always forget that one. Okay, but other than sanitation, roads, the Marshall Plan, the Internet, and pizza delivery within 30 minutes, what have the Americans ever done for us? Help, help, I’m being oppressed! ---
**Author:** ![sqweels](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f19dbf/32.png) [@sqweels](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sqweels)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/28 "2010-11-05T14:06:50Z")
My one saving grace after the debacle is that my local newspaper printed my rant in the letters to the editor section. And it sounds a little something like this: > [@Me](#): > > Paranoia and superstition. Hatred and hypocrisy. Bearing false witness. Dwelling upon the splinter in your neighbor’s eye while ignoring the plank in your own. > > How did these get to be the predominant American values? ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/29 "2010-11-05T14:20:17Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > Okay, but other than sanitation, roads, the Marshall Plan, the Internet, and pizza delivery within 30 minutes, what have the Americans ever done for us? Making a right turn on a red light. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/30 "2010-11-05T14:21:11Z")
> [@tomndebb](#): > > Nah. My brothers are coherent. Must be nice. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/31 "2010-11-05T14:25:17Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Well, for a while, Roosevelt did an acceptable job. I guess that was the Empire’s one shot at civilization. They blew it. LBJ made a stab. But he got . . . distracted. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/32 "2010-11-05T14:27:03Z")
> [@Morgenstern](#): > > Someone really needs more fiber in their diet. Or less. ---
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/33 "2010-11-05T14:29:50Z")
You forgot electricity. And I know we didn’t invent the Republic, but we made it cool. ---
**Author:** ![Walmarticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Walmarticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walmarticus)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/34 "2010-11-05T14:38:33Z")
Why does everybody cry SO DAMN MUCH about these elections. Cry babies in the circle of civilization, and cry babies in the sphere of barbarism. I wouldn’t cry as much as you weepy fucks do if we’d just found out separatists are building an army of Palin clones and we’ve just given Beck emergency powers that he promises to relinquish when the crises has abated. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/35 "2010-11-05T14:42:46Z")
Damn the man. Save the Empire. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/36 "2010-11-05T14:43:48Z")
> [@Walmarticus](#): > > Why does everybody cry SO DAMN MUCH about these elections. Cry babies in the circle of civilization, and cry babies in the sphere of barbarism. > > I wouldn’t cry as much as you weepy fucks do if we’d just found out separatists are building an army of Palin clones and we’ve just given Beck emergency powers that he promises to relinquish when the crises has abated. Speaking of that…only tears I’ve seen in this election have been from Beck himself, and from John Boehner. Honestly, the Dems are thrilled that a few nutball “Tea Party” candidates kept the Senate in a Democratic majority…the election could have gone much, much worse for them. ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/37 "2010-11-05T14:54:39Z")
Thanks Asshole, now it’s stuck in my head… [Don’t turn around uh-oh…](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Guvo7gUdUnE) gotta admit. I like the “CHU” part ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/38 "2010-11-05T14:58:17Z")
> [@Mosier](#): > > You forgot electricity. > > And I know we didn’t invent the Republic, but we made it cool. Do you mean Banana Republic? I love their blouses! ---
**Author:** ![MegaBee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f0a364/32.png) [@MegaBee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MegaBee)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/39 "2010-11-05T15:02:34Z")
> [@BubbaDog](#): > > Thanks Asshole, now it’s stuck in my head… > > [Don’t turn around uh-oh…](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Guvo7gUdUnE) > > gotta admit. I like the “CHU” part Son of a… DAMN IT! ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2010, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/40 "2010-11-05T15:02:56Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Fuck you, you stupid Americans. Fuck your empire. Fuck your imperialism. Most of all, however, fuck each and every one of you that truly believes that your piece of shit country belongs in the circle of civilized nations. > [@Commissar](#): > > Fuck the Empire for being the most mass-murdering nation in the history of mass murder. No nation but the Empire has EVER used nuclear weapons on other humans. And the Empire did it twice. > > Fuck the Empire. > [@Commissar](#): > > Why not go overboard with the ad hominem attacks? The sky is the limit, my friend, as long as you let your overactive imagination run free. Wait… what? Your entire OP and follow up is nothing but ad hominem, then you get upset when someone attacks you back? It’s one thing if you were interested in a debate, but you just came in here spewing your hate. And on top of that, your hate is horribly misplaced, I’m not happy that the Republicans won any more than I’d be happy if the Democrats had won. Neither party has demonstrated to me that their interests really go beyond whatever it takes to either get in power or stay in power. There are plenty of people in this country who are upset with what the government is doing but when they enter the voting booth, they either vote their ideals vainly or they vote for who they feel is the less of two evils. That you’d boil down our accomplishments two the worst things we did generations ago shows nothing but either a profound ignorance or deliberate trolling… probably both. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559.md?page=3)