# I Pit the Empire **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 5, 2010, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559 "2010-11-05T08:14:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/161 "2010-11-06T00:00:00Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > **Commissar** , it seems you accidentally forgot to explain why you aren’t living back in glorious Russia instead of our crappy country. He wants to move to China, the unabashedly Communist nation, except that he expects China to award him with a position that meets his desires instead of a position that meets China’s needs. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/162 "2010-11-06T00:03:38Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > He wants to move to China, the unabashedly Communist nation, except that he expects China to award him with a position that meets his desires instead of a position that meets China’s needs. Still, any of the Eastern European countries has to be better than here, right? ---
**Author:** ![Commissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c68b51/32.png) [@Commissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Commissar)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/163 "2010-11-06T00:22:48Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > Besides, since when does Communism care what _you_ want? You’re a cog; where do you best fit into the machine? Caring about what you want is a antisocial affectation, and is against the needs of the people. Ah, I see: you are laboring under a material misconception concerning the nature of Communism. The system isn’t about “machines” or “cogs;” it is about human beings, pure and simple. The only reason for the existence of Communism is the maximization of human happiness and the minimization of human suffering. Thus, yes, Communism cares very much what I (or you, or anyone else) want. That’s what it does. If you want heartless indifference, talk to the capitalists. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/164 "2010-11-06T00:30:18Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Ah, I see: you are laboring under a material misconception concerning the nature of Communism. The system isn’t about “machines” or “cogs;” it is about human beings, pure and simple. The only reason for the existence of Communism is the maximization of human happiness and the minimization of human suffering. > > Thus, yes, Communism cares very much what I (or you, or anyone else) want. That’s what it does. If you want heartless indifference, talk to the capitalists. The “heartless indifference” you refer to is a result of power over other people, whether that power be derived from this system of government or that one, and it doesn’t matter which system it is, because power always brings out many of the worst traits in humanity. Its why pure communism will never work as its a nice ideal on paper but cannot overcome human behavior. The good thing about the USA’s system is that the people that abuse power are capable of being removed from said power by the voting constituency (apparently you’ve never heard of impeachment, for example), but in a single ruling party communist government…the process is always more difficult and almost always bloody. And I’d like you to respond to my previous post, comrade. We had some back and forth there, you and I. ---
**Author:** ![woodstockbirdybird](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/woodstockbirdybird/32/7905_2.png) [@woodstockbirdybird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/woodstockbirdybird)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/165 "2010-11-06T00:32:03Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Ah, I see: you are laboring under a material misconception concerning the nature of Communism. The system isn’t about “machines” or “cogs;” it is about human beings, pure and simple. The only reason for the existence of Communism is the maximization of human happiness and the minimization of human suffering. When I think cheerful and carefree, the first things that pop into my mind are the U.S.S.R. and life under Chairman Mao! ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/166 "2010-11-06T00:35:00Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Thus, yes, Communism cares very much what I (or you, or anyone else) want. That’s what it does. I didn’t fall off the turnip truck just yesterday. > [@](#): > > If you want heartless indifference, talk to the capitalists. What is your best and most productive ability? Does the capitalist system recognize that as your best and most productive ability, and pay you accordingly? ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/167 "2010-11-06T00:35:38Z")
> [@woodstockbirdybird](#): > > When I think cheerful and carefree, the first things that pop into my mind are the U.S.S.R. and life under Chairman Mao! [Next, EVENINGWEAR! Very nice!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5CaMUfxVJVQ) ---
**Author:** ![Dissonance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/85f322/32.png) [@Dissonance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dissonance)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/168 "2010-11-06T00:39:09Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > I am Soviet I would like to join our comrade in declaring loyalty to and being a member of a defunct country left on the scrap-heap of history. Let it be known that I am Trebizondian. Feel free to pick your own extinct nation to belong to. ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/169 "2010-11-06T00:39:41Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > I believe that I can make a much more important contribution to the cause using my other talents and knowledge. Uh, yeah…if you’re planning on coming to China you’d better know that teaching ESL is pretty much the only job you can get unless you have phenomenal Chinese skills (and, even then, the companies that may want to hire might not have the right to hire foreigners). Also, trust me on this one: the Chinese wouldn’t be impressed with you at all. They’d think you were a huge douche. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/170 "2010-11-06T00:41:38Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Ah, I see: you are laboring under a material misconception concerning the nature of Communism. The system isn’t about “machines” or “cogs;” it is about human beings, pure and simple. The only reason for the existence of Communism is the maximization of human happiness and the minimization of human suffering. > > Thus, yes, Communism cares very much what I (or you, or anyone else) want. That’s what it does. If you want heartless indifference, talk to the capitalists. War is peace freedom is slavery ignorance is strength ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/171 "2010-11-06T00:46:46Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > Also, trust me on this one: the Chinese wouldn’t be impressed with you at all. They’d think you were a huge douche. Which makes them different from everyone else . . . umm, no it doesn’t. ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/172 "2010-11-06T00:50:28Z")
> [@Frank](#): > > Which makes them different from everyone else . . . umm, no it doesn’t. Well, yeah, of course. But I wouldn’t be surprised if **Commissar** thought he’d be welcomed with open arms upon arrival in China just because he’s a Communist. That certainly wouldn’t be the case. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/173 "2010-11-06T00:54:59Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > Also, trust me on this one: the Chinese wouldn’t be impressed with you at all. They’d think you were a huge douche. Isn’t that being unfair to our good bodily irrigation device? After all, it is useful. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/174 "2010-11-06T01:00:36Z")
Waaaaiiit a second… > [@Frank](#): > > What is your best and most productive ability? Does the capitalist system recognize that as your best and most productive ability, and pay you accordingly? > [@kidneyfailure](#): > > They’d think you were a huge douche. DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!!! ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/175 "2010-11-06T01:05:56Z")
> [@smeghead](#): > > waaaaiiit a second… > > Dingdingdingdingding!!! Glad I could be of service helping someone find a useful vocation! ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/176 "2010-11-06T01:24:37Z")
Why, I thought at first this was going to be a thread about a bad flooring/carpeting installation. \* “Call one, eight hundred, five eight eight, two…”\* ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/177 "2010-11-06T02:39:54Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > Also, trust me on this one: the Chinese wouldn’t be impressed with you at all. They’d think you were a huge douche. And if the 21st century is less of a clusterfuck than the twentieth, it’ll be because we are able to recognize these things we have in common. The US and PRC may differ on economic policy, environmental policy, human rights, and so on - but we can agree that the OP is a douche. I find that just a little bit beautiful. /hums “Imagine” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/178 "2010-11-06T03:39:37Z")
You have to give the OP this. He’s formed an attachment to the ideology that is best suited for him. Marxism will theoretically provide for his needs just because he exists. Capitalism, on the other hand, would insist that he do something useful first. ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/179 "2010-11-06T04:05:03Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > And if the 21st century is less of a clusterfuck than the twentieth, it’ll be because we are able to recognize these things we have in common. The US and PRC may differ on economic policy, environmental policy, human rights, and so on - but we can agree that the OP is a douche. > > I find that just a little bit beautiful. > > /hums “Imagine” I’m starting to tear up a little over here… ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2010, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559/180 "2010-11-06T04:11:57Z")
> [@Blaster\_Master](#): > > Wait… what? Your entire OP and follow up is nothing but ad hominem, then you get upset when someone attacks you back? It’s one thing if you were interested in a debate, but you just came in here spewing your hate. > And on top of that, your hate is horribly misplaced, I’m not happy that the Republicans won any more than I’d be happy if the Democrats had won. Neither party has demonstrated to me that their interests really go beyond whatever it takes to either get in power or stay in power. There are plenty of people in this country who are upset with what the government is doing but when they enter the voting booth, they either vote their ideals vainly or they vote for who they feel is the less of two evils. No, they don’t let us get away with that excuse. All of us voted for whoever actually won the various races, even if we actually voted for their opponents, and we bear the same total personal responsibility for whatever hateful thing America is doing now or has done in the past. Even if it’s being done by leaders we despise and didn’t vote for. Why else do we have to pretend to be Canadian when we travel abroad? And fuck the OP too. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-empire/559559.md?page=10)