# I PIT The ENTIRE Presidential Candidate Slate **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 23, 2007, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020 "2007-12-23T14:42:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Baron\_Greenback](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baron_greenback/32/48_2.png) [@Baron\_Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baron_Greenback)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2007, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/21 "2007-12-23T20:34:14Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Amazing] Eisenhower, Van Buren, Buchanan, Roosevelt, Roosevelt, Kennedy, Reagan. None of them are English names. [/QUOTE] Clinton is a bit of a grey area too. Sounds a bit Irish to me! ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2007, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/22 "2007-12-23T21:24:39Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Amazing] Eisenhower, Van Buren, Buchanan, Roosevelt, Roosevelt, Kennedy, Reagan. None of them are English names. [/QUOTE] Nixon, too. But except for Van Buren, they _sound_ Anglo (including Clinton), and that’s what counts. Also, I’m talking about recent years, not back when back-room convention politicking was prevalent. ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2007, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/23 "2007-12-23T21:35:36Z")
[QUOTE=guizot] Nixon, too. But except for Van Buren, they _sound_ Anglo (including Clinton), and that’s what counts. Also, I’m talking about recent years, not back when back-room convention politicking was prevalent. [/QUOTE] Only Kennedy ends in a vowel. So does Huckabee, so I think his odds aren’t so good. Plus, Huckabee just sounds funny. People might have trouble imagining “President Huckabee.” ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2007, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/24 "2007-12-23T21:53:36Z")
Be a Huck-a-do-bee, not a Huck-a-don’t-bee? ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2007, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/25 "2007-12-23T22:01:01Z")
I really wanted Sam Nunn to run. He’s probably the only man in America that could get us out of the shit we’re in. Maybe Colin Powell. But both of those two are too damn smart and levelheaded to want to deal with the current fucked up state of U.S. Presidential politics. The election almost always seems to be deciding the lesser of two evils. I vote Libertarian in most of them just out of pure frustration. I’ll make a slight exception with Clinton and Dole back in '96, I kinda liked both of those two. But Bush and Kerry? I knew no good was going to come from that no matter who won. So I’ll commiserate with **ralph124c**. I don’t like any of the bastards running right now. I can’t stand what the neo-cons have done to the Republican party (“conservative”, my ass, they spend more than a drunken Kennedy at a strip club) so I’ll probably vote for a democrat this year. _::sigh::_ “The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that’s out always looks the best.” - Will Rogers ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2007, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/26 "2007-12-23T22:52:22Z")
[QUOTE=ralph124c] “MITT” (Willard) Romney keeps telling us that he will chase the illegal aliens away-then admits to hiring them (they work cheap). .. [/QUOTE] I accidentally saw Mitt being questioned about this on some news show or other. The anchor quoted something from a newspaper about the landscaping on Mitt’s big pink house and how the contractor employed illegal aliens. When Mitt answered, he felt the most important thing to address first off was that he did not live in a pink house and never would live in a pink house. Well, glad that’s settled. I was worried we might elect a president whose home’s exterior paint color might indicate communistic tendencies or worse, effeminacy. Nothing could be worse than that. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2007, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/27 "2007-12-24T11:00:00Z")
[QUOTE=guizot] Only Kennedy ends in a vowel. [/quote] What, no love for James Monroe or Franklin Pierce? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2007, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/28 "2007-12-24T13:16:38Z")
[QUOTE=guizot] Religion Must be Christian, and attend services. Eliminates: (Possibly) Giuliani, because he doesn’t attend much, and probably Romney, because so many people don’t think Mormonism is really Christianity. Exceptions: I don’t know of any recently. [/QUOTE] Ronnie wasn’t a regular church goer in the years before he got elected. He _talked_ about it a lot, but didn’t do it. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2007, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/29 "2007-12-24T15:33:50Z")
[QUOTE=guizot] Nixon, too. [/QUOTE] Nixon is an English name. It’s a patronymic…“Nick’s son” becomes “Nixon”. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2007, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/30 "2007-12-24T17:13:08Z")
[QUOTE=A Monkey With a Gun] The election almost always seems to be deciding the lesser of two evils…I don’t like any of the bastards running right now. [/quote] Bluntly, get over it. The people you’d like to see aren’t running, and that does have something to do with why you’d like to see them. One of “the bastards running right now” WILL be the next President. Whatever their degree of “evilness”, you DO have a responsibility to pick the one you think will do the best (or least bad, whichever you like) job of it. Their performance WILL affect your life and the world. You do NOT have an excuse to simply opt out. > [@](#): > > “The one that’s out always looks the best.” - Will Rogers That goes for individual candidates, not just parties. Somebody who’s running, and getting taken seriously, automatically gets scrutiny, stuff automatically appears, their human failings get exposed and analyzed, and they automatically turn into one of “the bastards”. But it reflects media coverage much more than it reflects actual, fair-and-balanced character assessments. Remember that, at least since Watergate, political reporters have seen it as their duty, as well as a great career move, to “get somebody”. But you don’t have to buy into that game, and in fact you have a responsibility not to. True perfect plaster saints, even if they exist, don’t generally run for office; only humans do. And if they did get in, they wouldn’t be able to get much done. You \*do \* have to get your hands dirty in that business; you \*do \* have to make deals, many of which you would rather not explain; you _do_ have to do some pandering, or you _do_ fail to accomplish anything for anybody. It’s inherent in public service. You must approach the task more realistically and responsibly than this. Deal with it. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2007, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/31 "2007-12-24T17:34:55Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] Ronnie wasn’t a regular church goer in the years before he got elected. He _talked_ about it a lot, but didn’t do it. [/QUOTE] He’s also a great example of how a Republican only has to _talk_ about “family values” to get credit for supporting them. Only one President has ever given up on a marriage. Only one (is known to) refuse to speak to several of his own children. ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2007, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/32 "2007-12-24T18:40:05Z")
[QUOTE=Czarcasm] Publicly financed campaigns are a dream that will never happen. You would have to stop all reporting of an incumbents actions outside of the campaign, and that just isn’t possible. [/QUOTE] Just like national health care! And FTR, I have no problem with news coverage. If candidates couldn’t raise private funds to travel extensively, hire huge staffs, place ads, etc until the year of the election, it would really put the “earned” back into “earned media.” > [@gonzomax](#): > > Publicaly financed campaigns require those who benefit from the status quo to vote against themselves. Unlike the voters ,they do not vote against their own best interests, And I’m sure in countries where there are publicly financed campaigns, there is a contributor to another message board who is saying at this moment: “Of course there’s publicly financed campaigns! That’s because the politicians benefit from it!” ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2007, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/33 "2007-12-25T00:41:27Z")
[QUOTE=ElvisL1ves] Whatever their degree of “evilness”, you DO have a responsibility to pick the one you think will do the best (or least bad, whichever you like) job of it. Their performance WILL affect your life and the world. You do NOT have an excuse to simply opt out. [/QUOTE] Commissar **ElvisL1ves** , I’m having trouble deciding who to vote for as the next great man to lead our proud peoples. Candidate Stukov wishes to strike while the iron is hot and crush the capitalist pigs in a great battle to determine the fate of mankind. On the other hand, Dimitri prefers the long view. He says we should bide our time until they grow even weaker and more decadent, allowing us to easily crush them. They may even fall on their own in a repeat of our glorious worker revolution, allowing us to simply sit back and reap the rewards. I appreciate the cool analytical framework proposed by Dimitri, but I feel he needs more fire in his belly, like Stukov. I also feel that Dimitri may even fear them at the present moment and may cede to their demands. How do I decide who to vote for when I enter the voting cubicle, Commissar? ---
**Author:** ![Baron\_Greenback](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baron_greenback/32/48_2.png) [@Baron\_Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baron_Greenback)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2007, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/34 "2007-12-25T01:58:47Z")
[QUOTE=marshmallow] Commissar **ElvisL1ves** , I’m having trouble deciding who to vote for as the next great man to lead our proud peoples. Candidate Stukov wishes to strike while the iron is hot and crush the capitalist pigs in a great battle to determine the fate of mankind. On the other hand, Dimitri prefers the long view. He says we should bide our time until they grow even weaker and more decadent, allowing us to easily crush them. They may even fall on their own in a repeat of our glorious worker revolution, allowing us to simply sit back and reap the rewards. I appreciate the cool analytical framework proposed by Dimitri, but I feel he needs more fire in his belly, like Stukov. I also feel that Dimitri may even fear them at the present moment and may cede to their demands. How do I decide who to vote for when I enter the voting cubicle, Commissar? [/QUOTE] That must have seemed like a really funny thing to post when you were drunk. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2007, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/35 "2007-12-25T19:39:12Z")
[QUOTE=marshmallow] How do I decide who to vote for when I enter the voting cubicle, Commissar? [/QUOTE] Just in case there was a nugget of seriousness in there: The privilege of deciding, the factors weighing in your decision, and the responsibility for the consequences of the decision all lie with _you_. That’s what citizenship in a democratic republic _means_. I’m confident I was sufficiently clear about that. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2007, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/36 "2007-12-25T19:42:08Z")
Is that why you are urging us to vote for Ron Paul? ---
**Author:** ![aptronym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e47774/32.png) [@aptronym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aptronym)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2007, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/37 "2007-12-27T22:46:45Z")
Fuck the presidential candidates. **GIULIANI AND CLINTON FOR CO-DICTATORS!** ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2007, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/38 "2007-12-27T22:53:38Z")
Calling Michael Bloomberg! Get in the race Mike. 2012 might be too late! At the very least, the country will save about $400,000 on a president’s salary, since Bloomberg won’t take the money. ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2007, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020/39 "2007-12-28T01:28:23Z")
[QUOTE=Acid Lamp] snip (cynical hat) Who won’t get elected because he is black and has a funny name. [/QUOTE] Funny name is relative. I find “Willard Romney” to be amusing, & the nickname “Mitt” becomes goofy in the context of that given name. On the other hand, “Mike Huckabee” is goofy to some other people, while I find it sort of normal. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-entire-presidential-candidate-slate/431020.md?page=1)