# I pit the homeless men who defecate near my apartment **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 24, 2011, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789 "2011-01-24T15:29:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Crotalus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crotalus/32/41_2.png) [@Crotalus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crotalus)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/21 "2011-01-24T19:50:16Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > What the hell is a Jersey barrier? Usually called [a jersey wall](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jersey_wall) where I come from. Sections of movable concrete wall. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/22 "2011-01-24T19:53:37Z")
Oh. I just called those regular barriers all this time. I thought a Jersey barrier might maybe, I dunno, wear too much hair gel or something. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/23 "2011-01-24T19:57:11Z")
Or like the other kind, only orange. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/24 "2011-01-24T20:09:50Z")
This could also be a sign of a crack dealer in the neighborhood. I had a similar problem in an apartment building I used to live in. turned out they wer buying crack next door, and apparently it ree-he-he-heeeeeeallly makes you go. Call the police, they may be able to help. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/25 "2011-01-24T20:15:28Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > No, you can’t just call for get into a bathroom - at least, not in DC. But it’s rare for our shelters to be filled to capacity - my point was that one option would be for these men to make more of an effort to get into the shelters, which have toilets (and heat, and water, and food) and stay there until they get meds/jobs/sober and so on. That is not the way most shelters operate. You don’t get to “stay there” at all. You stand in line in the afternoon hoping to get a space to sleep that night in a room filled with others, then they kick you out early the next morning. Get jobs? You can’t get a job at Plaid Pantry without a call-back number and a legit address(and don’t even bother using the shelter’s number and address-the businesses already have those listed.) ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/26 "2011-01-24T22:00:52Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > This could also be a sign of a crack dealer in the neighborhood. I had a similar problem in an apartment building I used to live in. turned out they wer buying crack next door, and apparently it ree-he-he-heeeeeeallly makes you go. Never had the pleasure of trying crack, but recalling the side effects of my youthful experimentation with cocaine, I suspect a somewhat more fluid definition of “deposits” would apply. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/27 "2011-01-24T22:18:09Z")
I give this thread an A+ for title, a B for the OP, and an A- for overall conversation so far. ---
**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/28 "2011-01-24T22:24:28Z")
Lie in wait with a BB gun. Shoot the offender in the ass when he drops trou. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/29 "2011-01-24T22:24:54Z")
Reminds me of my favorite one-line hotel review ever: “Homeless people defecating in the lobby”. Can any guess which hotel? The Hotel Clinton in fabulous New York! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/30 "2011-01-24T22:31:42Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > I had a similar problem in an apartment building I used to live in. turned out they wer buying crack next door, and apparently it ree-he-he-heeeeeeallly makes you go. If you don’t like the piles of poo in your backyard, I want you to take all of them from the footpath and put them in a big pile and burn it, because all of the homeless people who made those big piles of excrement that added so much to your life in the past few weeks? Reeeeeeeaaaaallllllll fuckin’ high on drugs. Okay, not quite as much impact as “music”. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/31 "2011-01-24T22:33:27Z")
Couldn’t he at least find a dumpster? ---
**Author:** ![Walmarticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Walmarticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walmarticus)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/32 "2011-01-24T22:35:04Z")
I’ve never been homeless, but it seems like there are more discrete places to leave your poo, besides near a sidewalk. At the very least, you’d think they could wrap their crap in an empty burger wrapper and chuck it in a bin. ---
**Author:** ![Caffeine.addict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@Caffeine.addict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caffeine.addict)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/33 "2011-01-24T22:35:42Z")
It’s a problem in DC. The google map view for [519 H Street](http://frozentropics.blogspot.com/2009/12/caught-by-google-maps.html) has a guy taking a dump during the day on a busy street. I’ve seen people urinating in the alleys as well and they didn’t look homeless. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/34 "2011-01-24T22:48:54Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Couldn’t he at least find a dumpster? “Don’t shit where you eat.” ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/35 "2011-01-24T23:37:40Z")
> [@Caffeine.addict](#): > > It’s a problem in DC. The google map view for [519 H Street](http://frozentropics.blogspot.com/2009/12/caught-by-google-maps.html) has a guy taking a dump during the day on a busy street. I’ve seen people urinating in the alleys as well and they didn’t look homeless. From your link: \*I’m sorry to say it isn’t just the homeless. We live on an alley 2 blocks from H Street and for 10 years I have watched people literally pull up in nice cars to pee in it. They clearly could have gone to a nearby McDonald’s or equivalent. It is a cultural problem at this point that goes beyond economic situations. This behavior did not occur with such frequency in Boston. When I confront people they are always “shocked” I think it is a big deal. … You are exactly correct. Folks who think urinating in public (whether it be in alleys or out in more plain view) is limited to just the homeless obviously havent observed enough of the urination activity in DC. Ive seen well-dressed men get out of nice cars and pee in our alley; morning, midday, evening…doesnt really matter. And I’ve seen ladies squat and either pee or take a crap. What’s the solution? Gate off all of our alleys so they cant be walked through anymore? Who wants that? Not me Public restrooms? Nobody’s going to want that next to their home. For now, we self-police the problem: catch offenders, run them off, and hose the alley regularly. And yes, I have hosed down one or two alleys-pee-ers in my 5 yrs here. Still, there’s got to be a better way. Nobody should have to live alongside other people’s product. \* What the heck is going on in DC? Where did people get the idea that it was okay to act like this in public? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/36 "2011-01-24T23:50:20Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > Well, one option would be to hold it. Not without a plastic bag, bub. ---
**Author:** ![xoferew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/e9a140/32.png) [@xoferew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xoferew)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2011, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/37 "2011-01-24T23:51:13Z")
I’ve seen homeless guys get into a recessed doorway, block the view with their grocery cart or huge bag of recycling, and bustle about discreetly after which they are on their way with a plastic bag which they presumably deposit in a trash can. Thank you discreetly pooping homeless guys! I’ve also seen one squatting backwards over the edge of the subway track platform. Now that looked dangerous, especially for someone in an altered state of mind. You could easily lose your balance and die crushed by a train in your own poo with the blood-soaked remains of your pants around your ankles. Yikes. ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2011, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/38 "2011-01-25T00:36:47Z")
> [@Paranoid\_Randroid](#): > > Well, and aren’t there public bathrooms out there? I’m sure the workhouses, orphanariums, and prisons have them…humbug. By Jove, I even gave one of those homeless layabouts an honest shilling once, and the filthy bugger POOPED on it. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2011, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/39 "2011-01-25T01:28:05Z")
Think you have it bad. I once lived near a patch of woods. Every fucking day, the Pope was out there taking a dump. Embarassing. You’d think he had a gold plated Throne-Toilet somewhere he could use. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2011, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789/40 "2011-01-25T01:32:08Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Think you have it bad. I once lived near a patch of woods. Every fucking day, the Pope was out there taking a dump. Embarassing. You’d think he had a gold plated Throne-Toilet somewhere he could use. Then what the _hell_ were the bears doing to the alter boys? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-homeless-men-who-defecate-near-my-apartment/568789.md?page=3)