# I pit the Irish Presidential election **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 25, 2011, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573 "2011-09-25T18:03:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Laudenum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Laudenum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laudenum)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/1 "2011-09-25T18:03:29Z")
There are currently 7 candidates, the highest ever, yet I find myself faced with the choice of: 1. a geriatric who writes bad poetry, 2. an apologist for child abuse, 3. a terrorist, 4. a religious fundamentalist, 5. a woman who ran for the Presidency without reading up on the role, 6. a slightly-less religious-fundamentalist-but-still-pretty-damn conservative boring plank of wood, 7. a closet-FF’er This will be the first Presidential election that I can vote in, because we didn’t bother having one last time, and I find myself voting strategically to try and keep a terrorist out. GAH! ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/2 "2011-09-25T19:32:13Z")
1. A closet Father-Fucker? ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/3 "2011-09-25T20:14:09Z")
1 and 5 seem like your best bets… Still a shitty field. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/4 "2011-09-25T20:44:24Z")
FF = Fantastic Four? ---
**Author:** ![Neevil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Neevil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neevil)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/5 "2011-09-25T20:49:44Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > FF = Fantastic Four? I would guess FF refers to Fianna Fail, once the biggest political party in Ireland, now decimated following a trouncing at the last general election. ---
**Author:** ![Neevil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Neevil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neevil)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/6 "2011-09-25T20:53:20Z")
Oh and I would agree with the OP that this crop of candidates is not very inspiring. Unusually for me, at this point I have no idea who I will vote for. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/7 "2011-09-25T22:31:26Z")
> [@Neevil](#): > > I would guess FF refers to Fianna Fail, once the biggest political party in Ireland, now decimated following a trouncing at the last general election. A political party with the word “fail” in its name didn’t work out? Who could have predicted that? ---
**Author:** ![Laudenum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Laudenum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laudenum)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/8 "2011-09-25T23:04:53Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > A political party with the word “fail” in its name didn’t work out? Who could have predicted that? Actually, they were one of the world’s most successful political parties until the last five years. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/9 "2011-09-25T23:59:15Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > A political party with the word “fail” in its name didn’t work out? Who could have predicted that? Translated into English, the Irish “Fianna Fail” means “Soldiers of Destiny”. However, I’m not sure that’s really better, as it makes them sound like the title of an 80’s metal album or a band of grade B superheroes. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/10 "2011-09-26T00:53:09Z")
> [@Laudenum](#): > > 1. a geriatric who writes bad poetry, > 2. an apologist for child abuse, > 3. a terrorist, > 4. a religious fundamentalist, > 5. a woman who ran for the Presidency without reading up on the role, > 6. a slightly-less religious-fundamentalist-but-still-pretty-damn conservative boring plank of wood, > 7. a closet-FF’er Given those choices, I’ve got to pick #1. First, he’ll appoint himself Poet Laureate, so you’ll save some money there. Second, it won’t take too many visits from foreign heads of state being treated to “Oh freddled gruntbuggly/thy micturations are to me/As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee,” before visits from foreign heads of states dwindle to a trickle, and that’ll save money too. Third, he (or she) is geriatric, and may go senile, in which case the Irish nation can put him into a home, move into his mansion, sleep in his bed and eat his food, and sell off his knick-knacks and paintings for beer and cigarette money. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/11 "2011-09-26T02:16:08Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > A political party with the word “fail” in its name didn’t work out? Who could have predicted that? It’s pronounced closer to “fall” if that makes you feel better. Is it possible that Davis thinks that the law requires every President to be named “Mary,” thus making her a shoe-in? Anyway, it’s basically a sinecure, yeah? Kiss some babies, don’t get into any scandals, and they’re golden. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/12 "2011-09-26T07:34:35Z")
Go with the terrorist. Ireland needs to be scarier to the rest of the world. I think getting a nickname like “The Hamas of Western Europe” would do it. ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/13 "2011-09-26T08:56:54Z")
Hmm, the state visit of a terrorist would make for some interesting headlines. That will go down well in many nations, should help the Irish maintain visibility. ---
**Author:** ![Septima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@Septima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Septima)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/14 "2011-09-26T09:08:13Z")
If the worst thing your president does is write bad poetry, I’d say you’re coming out ahead where heads of state are concerned. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/15 "2011-09-26T09:17:03Z")
What powers dose the Irish President have anyway. Not much. Incientally even De Velera wanted to stay a Dominion ---
**Author:** ![Scathach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Scathach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scathach)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 9:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/16 "2011-09-26T09:36:16Z")
> [@Laudenum](#): > > 1. a geriatric who writes bad poetry, 2. an apologist for child abuse, 3. a terrorist, 4. a religious fundamentalist, 5. a woman who ran for the Presidency without reading up on the role, 6. a slightly-less religious-fundamentalist-but-still-pretty-damn conservative boring plank of wood, 7. a closet-FF’er GAH! Ugh yes, spare me from the god squad anyway. At this point Micheal D is beginning to look good. ---
**Author:** ![Scathach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Scathach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scathach)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/17 "2011-09-26T09:52:02Z")
Incidentally, you’ll note in the poll here: > **[Irish News | Breaking News from Ireland | BreakingNews.ie](https://www.breakingnews.ie/)** > > Ireland's premier breaking news website providing up to the minute news and sports reports. With e-mail news releases following breaking stories throughout the day. that “inanimate carbon rod” is currently quite a contender. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/18 "2011-09-26T10:42:54Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Go with the terrorist. Ireland needs to be scarier to the rest of the world. I think getting a nickname like “The Hamas of Western Europe” would do it. That would make for interesting travel ads. “All the senseless bloodshed of Palestine, all the violent alcoholism of Finland ! The Emerald Isle: come if ya tink yer hard enuff, ye pansy”. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Gadai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@An\_Gadai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Gadai)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/19 "2011-09-26T10:51:31Z")
Odd that Norris is back to being a contender. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573/20 "2011-09-26T10:57:03Z")
Do we have any indication of how good the terrorist’s poetry is? Are any of them fat? eta: Can you do write-in candidates in Ireland? Chuck Norris might be just what you guys need. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-the-irish-presidential-election/597573.md?page=2)