# I pit urethra stuffers **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 4, 2009, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237 "2009-11-04T01:38:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/121 "2009-11-05T23:15:08Z")
> [@gotpasswords](#): > > Even better - just don’t google anything with “bme” - there’s some seriously weird stuff there. Not long ago, I accidentally ran into a tale of someone who decided five toes per foot was too many and they’d apparently rather have hooves, so they removed bones and split their foot lenthwise. No kidding? How did that work for him? Can you PM me the link? (Yes, I admit I’m a very sick puppy about some things) ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/122 "2009-11-05T23:19:04Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > No kidding? How did that work for him? > > Can you PM me the link? (Yes, I admit I’m a very sick puppy about some things) Forget the PM. Start a new thread on BME and post the link. Because we’re _all_ sick puppies here. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/123 "2009-11-05T23:23:56Z")
**gotpasswords**!!! :D:D:D I like your guess better than what actually happened! You deserve a **ROTFLMFAO**!!! Still seeing “the picture” of that happening! Thanks for the laugh! Q ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2009, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/124 "2009-11-05T23:47:26Z")
> [@WolfpackJeep](#): > > My father worked for two pickle companies over the course of his life. He once told me about a guy who was fired for putting his dick in the pickle slicer. > > They fired the pickle slicer too. Y’all are just gonna HAVE to put up with my dementia, I reckon: Your post made me think of rhyming what you wrote: "I’m not a pickle slicer, I’m a pickle slicer’s son! And I’m sitting slicing dickles till the dickle slicer comes!" Which comes from an old Irish Rovers tune… "I’m not a chicken plucker, I’m the chicken plucker’s son, and I’m sitting plucking chickens till the chicken fucker comes!" And yes, I DO have problems with the latter! 🙂 Q ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/125 "2009-11-06T00:06:30Z")
**Pheasant Plucker’s Son**! **NOT** “Chicken Pluckers”! God, I am such an idjit!:smack: SORRY! Q ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/126 "2009-11-06T00:12:15Z")
I have lived quite a goodly number of years without ever knowing anything about “uretha stuffers”. I am in the midst of a crisis of faith, that perhaps there is some ignorance that might be best left undisturbed. I believe the term amongst the puppy Dopers is “squicked”. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/127 "2009-11-06T00:15:12Z")
Ya know, I think we should show our appreciation for The Mercotan. I vote we send him a card and a dozen long stem roses- Delivered in a prisoner’s urethra ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/128 "2009-11-06T00:25:58Z")
My husband was ignorant in the ways of urethra stuffing, and I enlightened him. Perhaps his penis will emerge from his abdominal cavity sometime before the New Year, but I’m not holding my breath. I have been informed that there are some very sick puppies in this cruel world, and I am cruel, for telling him this stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce7236/32.png) [@Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lisa_Simpson)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/129 "2009-11-06T00:35:20Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > The comment about opiates and benzos also makes me wonder if the daughter is perhaps taking advantage of mom’s problems for her own amusement and/or profit. > > It’s a horrible thought, but there ARE people out there who will exploit a person with health problems … Particularly when they steal from someone’s needed medication, leaving them in in pain and suffering. Trust me Broomstick, this is the first thing I thought of when she started fishing around for meds, and I also mentioned it to a few other co workers. We are observing the situation. As for what I think of this daughter… well someday I will start a pit thread about abusive, disfunctional families that bring their pathologies to the hospital with t hem. But this is not the thread. End hijack and back to your regularly scheduled urethral foreign body thread. ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/130 "2009-11-06T00:40:54Z")
Oh, jesus god in heaven, why did I open this thread? I KNEW it was a bad idea, and did it anyway! Some things, you just can’t unsee/unread. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/131 "2009-11-06T00:41:07Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > My husband was ignorant in the ways of urethra stuffing, and I enlightened him. > > Perhaps his penis will emerge from his abdominal cavity sometime before the New Year, but I’m not holding my breath. > > I have been informed that there are some very sick puppies in this cruel world, and I am cruel, for telling him this stuff. Show him the piccy of Mariska Hargitay that was posted recently, that should help coax lil happy out 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/132 "2009-11-06T00:42:00Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > My husband was ignorant in the ways of urethra stuffing, and I enlightened him. > > Perhaps his penis will emerge from his abdominal cavity sometime before the New Year, but I’m not holding my breath. What _are_ you doing, anticipating enjoying a restful couple of months? ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/133 "2009-11-06T00:50:04Z")
Just as an FYI, a colleague of mine had one guy who inserted speaker wire, it formed a knot in the bladder, and could not be removed via the urethra. Off to the local ER, then to the urologist for surgical intervention. You know, some orifices just were not meant to have things put in them, other than the occasional catheter or culture swab. Another true (but rather sad story) is of a married couple whose sex life had been rather painful and dissatisfying for them both, from the very beginning of their marriage. Neither one had prior sexual experience, adequate sex education, or the willingness to take their problems to a doctor or counselor for nearly 10 years. Finally when they sought help as to why the woman could not get pregnant, it turned out that he’d been having intercourse with her urethra all these years. It dilated somewhat to accomodate him, but never gave either of them much pleasure. I’m amazed she didn’t have terrible bladder infections. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/134 "2009-11-06T01:09:14Z")
My first question was “How the _hell_ can you mistake a uretha for a vagina?”. Then my second reaction was “Maybe I don’t want to know.” Of course, if QtM posts an explanation I will feel compelled to read it regardless. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/135 "2009-11-06T01:13:28Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > My first question was “How the _hell_ can you mistake a uretha for a vagina?” Ignorance, a culture of shame/guilt about one’s body and sexuality, and a terrible fear of looking stupid by asking for help would be my guesses, having dealt with patients and their body/sex hangups for a quarter-century now. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/136 "2009-11-06T01:18:26Z")
> [@Quasimodem](#): > > One of the patients who stand out (so to speak) in my memory is the trucker whose buddies dared him to place a lug nut from a wheel around his penis. Y’all can guess what happened, right? Cross-threaded? Ouch. > [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Just as an FYI, a colleague of mine had one guy who inserted speaker wire, it formed a knot in the bladder,… I can tie a cherry stem with my tongue, but _damn_! ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/137 "2009-11-06T01:25:40Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Another true (but rather sad story) is of a married couple whose sex life had been rather painful and dissatisfying for them both, from the very beginning of their marriage. Neither one had prior sexual experience, adequate sex education, or the willingness to take their problems to a doctor or counselor for nearly 10 years. Finally when they sought help as to why the woman could not get pregnant, it turned out that he’d been having intercourse with her urethra all these years. It dilated somewhat to accomodate him, but never gave either of them much pleasure. I’m amazed she didn’t have terrible bladder infections. Great Og, that image just made me curl up into a ball and whimper. ---
**Author:** ![BrandonR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@BrandonR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrandonR)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/138 "2009-11-06T01:28:02Z")
Hangups or not, that’s one helluva blunder. Seems strange they never thought to put the penis in the larger, moister hole an inch or so away. I’m thinking maybe the urethra evolved to be where it is as a basic intelligence test to see if you have a minimal awareness to have kids… ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/139 "2009-11-06T01:31:14Z")
> [@BrandonR](#): > > Hangups or not, that’s one helluva blunder. Seems strange they never thought to put the penis in the larger, moister hole an inch or so away. Considering how many vaginas I’ve encountered (professionally) that were so tight they would not even accomodate a pinky finger, it doesn’t surprise me that the path of least resistance could become the urethra. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/140 "2009-11-06T01:49:51Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > …You know, some orifices just were not meant to have things put in them, other than the occasional catheter or culture swab. … Oh, sure, its fine if you’re a medical professional, but other folks? Nooooo! And I know that the nurse who inserted that catheter was smirking when she did it, OK, her back was turned, but her shoulders showed she was smiling, and I’m kinda sorry I said what I did, but that skirt did make her butt look like the Hindenburg… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237.md?page=8)