# I pit urethra stuffers **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 4, 2009, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237 "2009-11-04T01:38:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/141 "2009-11-06T01:50:02Z")
I’m not sure which is boggling me more - the idea some woman has a urethra “an inch or so away” from her vagina, or that there are vagina tighter than urethra out there. I am _assuming_ my anatomy is normal (it certainly seems to match medical illustrations I’ve seen), it had not crossed my mind that there are variations that extreme. Ah, blissful ignorance, where are you now…? ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/142 "2009-11-06T01:58:43Z")
Urethra Frankness. (The Queen Asshole?) ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/143 "2009-11-06T03:16:06Z")
Sometimes the fight against ignorance comes at too high a price. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/144 "2009-11-06T03:19:10Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Sometimes the fight against ignorance comes at too high a price. Don’t turn your backs on those of us on the front lines. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/145 "2009-11-06T03:19:49Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Another true (but rather sad story) is of a married couple whose sex life had been rather painful and dissatisfying for them both, from the very beginning of their marriage. Neither one had prior sexual experience, adequate sex education, or the willingness to take their problems to a doctor or counselor for nearly 10 years. Finally when they sought help as to why the woman could not get pregnant, it turned out that he’d been having intercourse with her urethra all these years. It dilated somewhat to accomodate him, but never gave either of them much pleasure. I’m amazed she didn’t have terrible bladder infections. I think I read that in a book somewhere. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/146 "2009-11-06T03:21:05Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Don’t turn your backs on those of us on the front lines. **PLEASE** never do! Q ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/147 "2009-11-06T03:27:30Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Don’t turn your backs on those of us on the front lines. Turn my back on folks in a PRISON? Lord no, even without dropping the soap. But now I’m finding it’s not all that safe to face forward either. I guess shuffling sideways will have to do. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/148 "2009-11-06T03:41:26Z")
Not to make you neurotic, but “lateral abscess” means “a hole in the side”, right? I don’t think sideways is going to work, either. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_fun_ball/32/17664_2.png) [@Happy\_Fun\_Ball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Fun_Ball)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/149 "2009-11-06T03:43:55Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Another true (but rather sad story) is of a married couple whose sex life had been rather painful and dissatisfying for them both, from the very beginning of their marriage. Neither one had prior sexual experience, adequate sex education, or the willingness to take their problems to a doctor or counselor for nearly 10 years. Finally when they sought help as to why the woman could not get pregnant, it turned out that he’d been having intercourse with her urethra all these years. It dilated somewhat to accomodate him, but never gave either of them much pleasure. I’m amazed she didn’t have terrible bladder infections. Really? No, Really? Wow. :eek: You’re kidding right? Please? ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/150 "2009-11-06T03:50:43Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > What _are_ you doing, anticipating enjoying a restful couple of months? He’s going on a hunting trip tomorrow, and will be hunting regularly for the next couple of months. So I’d get a couple of restful months whether I’d told him about urethral stuffing or not. Unless I sexually harass some fine young waiter somewhere. > [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Just as an FYI, a colleague of mine had one guy who inserted speaker wire, it formed a knot in the bladder, and could not be removed via the urethra. Off to the local ER, then to the urologist for surgical intervention. > > You know, some orifices just were not meant to have things put in them, other than the occasional catheter or culture swab. I don’t think that those orifices are meant to have the occasional culture swab or catheter, actually. Yeah, they can accommodate them, but they aren’t MEANT to have them. I will admit that a couple of times I’ve been glad to have been catheterized, but during those times I would have been glad of any sort of relief. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/151 "2009-11-06T03:53:50Z")
You sure that isn’t just a disturbin’ legend? (OK, now that I think about it, and maybe you got a citation, but don’t link it, OK? I’ll just take yer word for it, no prob, I trust you…) ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/152 "2009-11-06T04:09:52Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Tobacco, shanks, drugs, and for reasons not adequately explained, a whistle. Lord this made me giggle like an idiot until I thought about it, and lord almighty that’s gross. I really, really hate asking this but I can’t stop thinking about it: so, uh, a guy is bored and decides to put a metal screw into his urethra. I assume (please don’t tell me if I’m wrong) that these are tiny screws, like the type you use to hold eyeglass frames together. Ignoring the mechanics of getting it in there, which I’m not entirely sure I understand but I’m fine with that…how does our enterprising young man then remove said screw? I’m now going to go think about puppies and kittens and rainbows and unicorns and try to stop thinking about this. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/153 "2009-11-06T04:17:15Z")
> [@NinjaChick](#): > > Lord this made me giggle like an idiot until I thought about it, and lord almighty that’s gross. > > I really, really hate asking this but I can’t stop thinking about it: so, uh, a guy is bored and decides to put a metal screw into his urethra. I assume (please don’t tell me if I’m wrong) that these are tiny screws, like the type you use to hold eyeglass frames together. \*\*Ignoring the mechanics of getting it in there, which I’m not entirely sure I understand but I’m fine with that…how does our enterprising young man then remove said screw? \*\* > > I’m now going to go think about puppies and kittens and rainbows and unicorns and try to stop thinking about this. That’s why you should always use a self tapping screw, backs right out with a screwdriver. You’re welcome. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/154 "2009-11-06T04:42:40Z")
This reminds me – I just got a postcard today from my optometrist – I have to make an appointment for an eye exam. > [@Panurge](#): > > Considering how I feel from just reading about the subject, I can think of nothing more justified from the OPs point of view than a good sound pitting. **QtM** do you actually deal with this shit on a regular basis? > > - And: What contraband? > > and for the shock value: Do _not_ search for “bme pain olympics” - it makes the urethra stuffing look like child’s play. According to Wiki, it’s [fake](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pain_Olympics#BME_Pain_Olympics:_Final_Round). (No, I haven’t watched it) Those of you in the medical profession, won’t you please start a thread detailing your best stories? Pretty please? (BTW, **Qadgop** , DID Mr. Bagel-Dog get the state to pay for his er, penis “unmodification?” What happened to the guy?) ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/155 "2009-11-06T05:37:51Z")
> [@](#): > > Ignoring the mechanics of getting it in there, which I’m not entirely sure I understand but I’m fine with that…how does our enterprising young man then remove said screw? Usually, people who do this sort of thing are not known for their ability to plan ahead. They think of something, then they do it immediately. They do NOT stop to consider the consequences. Considering the pool of patients that **QtM** is currently responsible for, I’d say that their long-range planning skills are just about nonexistent. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/156 "2009-11-06T06:14:54Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > My first question was “How the _hell_ can you mistake a uretha for a vagina?”. And, strangely, there are women who think they are both the same hole. ---
**Author:** ![DETXL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/detxl/32/19366_2.png) [@DETXL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DETXL)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/157 "2009-11-06T07:01:32Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > I think I read that in a book somewhere. _Catch-22_ comes to mind. Though I suppose it’s no surprise that, with six billion people on our planet, life would at least occasionally imitate art. To the detriment of poor **QtM** , alas. ---
**Author:** ![Maiira](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f04885/32.png) [@Maiira](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maiira)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/158 "2009-11-06T08:31:39Z")
_Curls into a ball and weeps in a corner, forever_ ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 9:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/159 "2009-11-06T09:19:17Z")
Kinda new here, huh, kid? Here, take my hanky… Sure, its a bit crusty, thats from glazed doughnuts! Don’t give me that look! ---
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2009, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237/160 "2009-11-06T10:32:27Z")
> [@NinjaChick](#): > > I’m now going to go think about puppies and kittens and rainbows and unicorns and try to stop thinking about this. Maybe not unicorns. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-urethra-stuffers/516237.md?page=9)