# I, Robot: Will not suck? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 24, 2004, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104 "2004-06-24T23:38:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![mrunlucky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7993a0/32.png) [@mrunlucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrunlucky)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/41 "2004-07-08T02:43:08Z")
My problem with this whole mess, besides that I can’t stand Will Smith and have never liked him, is that nothing about him ever suggests “serious dramatic actor” or what have you. I’m sure this movie will be littered with dumb jokes and one-liners, all for the sake of making Smith look really really cool to still-unconvinced 13-year-old boys, at any cost, regardless of the actualy story or plotline. I’m betting this movie will be in fierce competition to out-suck _Catwoman_ for worst movie of the summer. My only hope is that _Catwoman_ will be so unintentionally funny that it will not end up out-sucking _Batman and Robin_. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/42 "2004-07-08T02:51:28Z")
Why don’t they just advertise _Catwoman_ the intelligent way? Show a sixty second clip of Halle Berry walking around in her costume. As for _I, Robot_, I’ve now seen the ad and it appears the filmmakers accidently replaced their copy of Asimov’s book with an issue of _Magnus, Robot Fighter_. ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/43 "2004-07-08T02:53:01Z")
> [@](#): > > Will ‘I, Robot’ form the trifecta of Robot Movies That Suck?: > > Bicentenial Man > A.I. > ??? Oh, there were bad robot movies long before those. (And _A.I._ wasn’t bad; it was, in fact, brilliant in some respects. A little rewriting and it could have been great.) You want bad? Try _Saturn Three_. Even if, miraculously, _I, Robot_ turns out to be good, I’ll still be pissed off by the trailer, which is of the kind that gives you the whole plot of the movie. As Roger Ebert said, a movie trailer should be like the aroma of baking bread that draws you into the bakery; instead they’re giving away big slices, which tell you everything you need to know about the bread except what the whole loaf would be like. (I’m paraphrasing.) That’s why I didn’t go see _What Lies Beneath_; the trailer gave away most of the plot points, which is not a good thing if you want to entice me to see a thriller. ---
**Author:** ![ChrisM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/47e85d/32.png) [@ChrisM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChrisM)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/44 "2004-07-08T04:47:01Z")
> [@Brainiac4](#): > > \*\*Dangerosa \*\*and I saw Spider-Man 2 on Monday. There were, of course, previews. One was for Catwoman. It was followed by the preview for Blade:Trinity. > > I was just amazed at the idiocy of the people putting this together. “Hey, I know, let’s put the Catwoman trailer up, you know, the one that’s cut real fast so you think it’s got lots of cool action and might not suck? Yeah, and then let’s put the new Blade one right after it… the one that… um… reminds everyone what an action movie is supposed to be like… woops.” I just saw Spider-Man 2 today, and yes, I got the Catwoman trailer, but how come every one else got the Blade trailer, and I got a trailer for “Anacondas: The Search for a Crappy Movie” and a 30-second teaser for “Seed of Chucky?” The “I, Robot” trailer seems to have little to do with Asimov, but I’m probably going to give it a chance, in hopes that Proyas manages to make it at least visually interesting. ---
**Author:** ![Linus\_Van\_Pelt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@Linus\_Van\_Pelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linus_Van_Pelt)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/45 "2004-07-08T06:18:30Z")
> [@Gangster Octopus](#): > > I dunno, if the movie was called _Those Darned Robots_ and never claimed to have any connection with the Asimov stories, I think I would be looking forward to it. I certainly like Alex Proyas as a Director. > > **msmith** fie on you for putting _A.I._ on a list with _Bicentennial Man_ At least _Bicentenial Man_, despite its flaws, did something that _I, Robot_ apparently does not - it stayed faithful to the basic idea of the original story. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/46 "2004-07-08T07:49:32Z")
I was watching the trailers again when I noticed something interesting: although you see robots crawling up wall, lurching menacingly at people and causing massive property damage, at no point does a robot actually kil (or try to kill)l a human being. All the violence portrayed is _against_ the robots. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just being overly optomistic, but after all, I’ve never really liked Isaac Asimov all that much anyway. I respect him immensly for his role in inventing the science fiction genre, and I’d be the first to admit that he was a brilliant man, but his stories always seemed too staid and mannered, his dialogue flat, his plots dry and uninvolving. They work well as puzzles and logical games, but not as literature. I think a bit of Hollywood flash-bang razzle-dazzle would do his ideas some good. Proyas is a talented, thoughtful director, and as long has he retains some of Asimov’s basic intelligence, the movie could have potential. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/47 "2004-07-08T11:48:25Z")
At the risk of losing any remaining respect I may have among Board denizens, I want to note that I actually _liked_ **Bicentennial Man**. I’ve got the DVD. It _feels_ more like an Asimov story than anything else I’ve seen, and seems to embody his vision better than anything else I’ve seen. It is the definitive (thus far) interpretation of Asimov in celluloid. (better than the _two_ bad versions of “Nightfall”. Better than the well-intentioned “Ugly Little Boy”. Better than a number of student films based on his short stories. I can’t say how it stacks up against adaptations done for the 1960s British Tv series “Out of the Unknown”, 'cause I haven’t seen them.) But I predict **I, Robot** will be bloody awful. I agree with the suggestion that this will be to his work as Starship Troopers was to Heinlein’s. I’ve already made the same analogy myself. And I hated **A.I.** despite it being a sort-of collaboration between my favorite directot (Kubrick) and one I respect (Spielberg). ---
**Author:** ![Edward\_The\_Head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce73a5/32.png) [@Edward\_The\_Head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edward_The_Head)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/48 "2004-07-08T14:41:11Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > At the risk of losing any remaining respect I may have among Board denizens, I want to note that I actually _liked_ **Bicentennial Man**. I’ve got the DVD. It _feels_ more like an Asimov story than anything else I’ve seen, and seems to embody his vision better than anything else I’ve seen. I’m going to have to go along with you and say I liked Bicentennial Man. I never saw what was so bad about the movie at all. I can’t remember if I ever read I Robot or not. I read a lot of his work a few years ago. I don’t actually think I did read it, but it’s hard to find his works in stores, or at least it was when I was reading Asimov. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/49 "2004-07-08T22:35:25Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > Why don’t they just advertise _Catwoman_ the intelligent way? Show a sixty second clip of Halle Berry walking around in her costume. The clips I’ve seen manage to bore me with the sight of Halle Berry in skintight leather. That takes true mastery of cinematic incompetence. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2004, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/50 "2004-07-08T23:46:45Z")
> [@Big Bad Voodoo Lou](#): > > I’m not an Asimov fan–reading science fiction has never been my idea of fun. But the movie is directed by Alex Proyas, who directed the first Crow movie and the excellent, underrated Dark City. If nothing else, the movie should be a visual treat, brimming with style. My sentiments exactly - Dark City director trumps Will Smith for me. Although, if there’s another trailer that shows even one painful smart-assed one-liner from Smith, I’m leaning the other way. ::kicks robot in head:: “You just got re-booted.” ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/51 "2004-07-09T00:23:10Z")
Plus, the robots just look STUPID! Good grief! WHO would envision a robot like that!? Especially the early version robots that they are supposed to be. To me, they look like Gumby meets the Incredible Stick Man. :wally ---
**Author:** ![Yumblie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/76d3ee/32.png) [@Yumblie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yumblie)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/52 "2004-07-09T00:46:51Z")
Unless the trailor’s being really clever, this movie seems to be filled to the brim with cliches half a century old. Just the tagline, _One man saw it coming_, makes me cringe. Asimov’s stories certainly aren’t very action-packed, but there are ways to spice them up without completely reversing the theme of the stories. And I agree that those robots are creepy and would never be integrated into human society looking like that. Asmiov covers the fear of robots a lot in his stories, and usually makes them look as metalic and inhuman as possible. In other words, robots are _tools_, not slaves. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/53 "2004-07-09T01:32:39Z")
[David Spade]I liked this movie better when it was called _Blade Runner_.[/DS] I’ve read Harlan’s original script (which Warner Bros turned down to make [Damnation Alley](http://imdb.com/title/tt0075909/)!), and while there were a few problems with it, at least it was intelligent. _This_ looks to be just a retread of _Blade Runner_, with Will Smith shoehorned in so he can make wisecracks (wonder if he’s figured out it’s pronounced “Ear **th** ” and _not_ “Ear **f** ” yet?). ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/54 "2004-07-09T02:58:30Z")
I;m afraid Will shall. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/55 "2004-07-09T04:50:18Z")
Oh, no. The robot designs are pure genius. Look at the heads. They’re iRobots. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/56 "2004-07-09T05:33:40Z")
I suspect that I’m really going to resent what they do to Dr. Calvin. Such a great character, and it appears that she’s only in there to give us some boobs to distract us from Will Smith’s ears. Bleah. ---
**Author:** ![Kaitlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/73ab20/32.png) [@Kaitlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaitlyn)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/57 "2004-07-09T15:03:06Z")
Unless the trailers aren’t really representative of the movie as a whole, which they often aren’t, it doesn’t look good. For examle, look at the interrogation room clip. Will goads the robot into getting angry and smashing the table. This is ridiculous. A robot will only do what it’s programmed to do, and it makes no sense to program a robot to display anger. It wouldn’t be a helpful trait for a domestic servant or a military weapon. Now, I’m willing to admit that it’s possible that the trailer is misleading. The movie may not be about domestic robots somehow getting military programming and running amok so that a human has to kill them all. But I’m not hopeful. This looks like a “Frankenstein Syndrome” movie through and through. It’s beginning to look like the episode of _The Outer Limits_ may be the only halfway decent Asimov adaptation we’ll ever get. ---
**Author:** ![Papermache\_Prince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f05b48/32.png) [@Papermache\_Prince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Papermache_Prince)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/58 "2004-07-09T15:12:28Z")
Which _Outer Limits_ episode was an adaptation of an Asimov story? The _I, Robot_ episode was an adaptation of the 1939 story by Eando Binder. More details [here](http://www.nationmaster.com/encyclopedia/I,-Robot). ---
**Author:** ![Kaitlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/73ab20/32.png) [@Kaitlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaitlyn)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2004, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/59 "2004-07-09T15:50:01Z")
That’s the one I was thinking of. I guess we’re left without any decent adaptations of Asimov’s work. The problem may be that Asimov’s stories were about ideas and were usually dialog driven, while sci-fi movies tend to be action-adventure stories with more in common with westerns than literary sci-fi. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2004, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104/60 "2004-07-10T23:14:37Z")
I agree it doesn’t look good. The whole point of Asimov’s stories was that people were **irrational** to fear robots. If the movie ends up basicly saying “yes, we SHOULD be afraid of robots”, it’ll make _Starship Troopers_ look like a masterpiece of ironic genius. So what could the “twist” at the end be? The only thing that comes to mind would be the robots somehow deciding that they should frame themselves, and trick humanity into destroying them, because in the long run humans would be better off without them? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-robot-will-not-suck/252104.md?page=4)